hakuna matata

alritey. am really rested. haha. almost 12 hrs!! ugh. can't believe myself. i woke up at 8.30 initially but thought i'll sleep 1 hour more and ended up waking up at 12.15. well well. wat to do.

anyway ahh i just forgot wat i was going to say. it was something about australia though. hums. ohh!! yes sydney opera house. it isn't that wonderful really, i think esplanade is more impressive. esp the concert hall. sydney opera hse's concert hall isn't very awe-inspiring. it was quite funny though when the 2nd half started and the orchestra players all came out wearing tinsel/attaching tinsel to various parts of their instruments, and the lady behind us exclaimed very loudly between chuckles "they're being rather silly!" haha. the soprano was awesome though. first time i've ever heard actually. but yeah. wow.

and i'm so sorry to admit to abusing one of the wombats at the featherdale wildlife park to make it come out. i felt quite bad about it lar. but i really wanted to see it walk around! gah. and it still didn't come out of its hole. so i guess we din do it much harm. fat lazy things. they're supposed to graze in the day quite often even though they're nocturnal. but the echidnas were really cute though haha waddle around like sea slugs on the seabed. okay that doesn't sound v nice but when my bro sends it over to me everyone will see wat i mean.

and the koala that had bad aiming! haha. it was feeding time so the koalas were scrambling towards the eucalyptus leaves.. and one of them, when jumping from one branch to another, almost fell over. quite funny:p

saw a lot of amazing things there. mostly animal-related though haha. i should go do something related to animals huh. my dad was saying last yr i was so enchanted by the dolphins at siegfried n roy's secret garden that i wanted to bring one home, and now i want to bring a wombat home. haha. but it's so cute and fat. wish i'd been able to see a platypus though. we did get to see it in the movie but it's different when it's right in front of your face i guess.

lemme see. yes. the cow which tricked me into walking into a cobweb. the farmstay! so i was standing on the verandah and then suddenly this cow which was grazing looked up and stared at me. so i wanted to walk closer and stare at it and then ended up walking into a cobweb. grr.

and feeding the farm animals! haha. hungry cows galloping was hilarious. my brother couldn't stop laughing at their greediness. and was so appalled when the big bull licked his hand. and then brucie the pig who put her two front feet into the food trough while eating. (and then this lady who was watching told her husband "don't talk to me abt table manners nxt time!") and then brucie somehow ended up losing her balance/decided to lie down and overturned the food trough (its round-bottomed, made up of a barrel cut longitudinally) so the food spilled onto the ground.

i saw alpacas! pity they were shaved the day before we arrived though. i have a pillow at home which is made from their wool/fur/watever u call it. bought frm vegas last yr.

umm. oh i really liked the house tt we stayed on at the farm. it's so tastefully decorated. maybe cos its new.. 1 yr old only. but i got the pink room! haha. took lots of photos of the rooms cos they're all colour-themed, really pretty:) and it so happens the pink room had a queen bed so i got the whole bed to myself. but the other rooms had queen beds too lar so not much diff anyway.

the only problem was the abundance of insects around. in the houses and outside. so many flies!! ugh. got so annoyed. dirty things. and i've gone off horse-riding a bit. maybe cos i forgot most of wat i learnt last time.. got to take lessons again maybe. or maybe need the correct footwear haha.

okay i better hurry up with my uni app forms.

alright. am back. and really tired. i woke up at the singapore equivalent of 5am. augh. and watched like 3 movies in a row on the plane. SIA movie selection is really good.. plus the music.. u'll never be bored.. but not good for eyes yeah.

christine's house is so so so nice!! can compare with denise's liao. just that she doesn't have a pool table haha

i dun think my brain is working v well at the moment so i shan't attempt to say much abt my trip. besides the fact tt i'm sick of hot sun and looong drives. and that it's so fun seeing kangaroos on the road! haha. and i always appreciate spore much better aft holidays abroad heh. and it was hilarious with my crazy bro around. nobody'd believe he's 22 and i'm 18. even i don't believe it most of the time.

anyway, since serene so kindly reminded me, here is the story of the emergency lever. which i don't doubt she has told most of the world, seeing that I always find out about how she's told the whole world various events which I don't remember telling many pple.
check-in counter
guy asks my mom : how old is ur daughter?
mom : 18? why?
guy : oh.. its okay.. underaged children aren't supposed to sit next to the emergency door
mom starts getting worried : 18 isn't underage rite?
guy laughs : no.. its just that some stewardesses don't allow.. they're afraid they (children) will play with the lever..
i'm in a state of disbelief and shock. sarcastically : rite.. so i'm going to start playing with the lever later..

when i'm more free i will type more quotes. like how my bro was so fascinated by the accent that hong kong pple have when they speak english. esp the guy who was explaining opals to us.

alright. off to australia tonight.. back on 27th night. i don't suppose anyone will be writing xmas cards this year rite haha maybe i'll write new year cards or sth hmm.

heh i'm here doing last minute essays n my parents are doing last minute planning for holiday. yay.. the last minute lin family. anyway they keep talking about "coomba" which sounds so much like "kumar" haha. which reminds me he still owes me my 3 SAT books. i forgot this classic quote from the french movie on sunday.. may not be v accurate though i don't remember exactly wat happened

gal hears squeaking and scratching at night : what's tt?? -huddles in bed-
guy : i don't know, i'm not an expert on animal noises
squeaking resumes
gal gets more frightened : can u get up and see wat is it??
guy doesn't want to, wants to sleep : mouse, rat, giant roach, ...
gal shrieks in fright
guy sighs in resignation and gets up and checks under the bed : nothing. it's beneath the floorboards
gal, v agitated : but wat IS it??
guy, annoyed : bambi
gal is stunned : wat?
guy : bambi! since u want a name, i'm giving u a name..

so i was just thinking of a fawn in the floorboards. most amusing haha.

haha lunch was fun. cheukka and her "softshell crab isn't crab wat!" "oh. i thought it was something like crayfish" various other things which i forgot.. and kai with her silly jokes.. whereby the only thing that is funny about them is her laughter after every joke.

and the movie was.. well.. unexpected. i didn't know there was going to be singing in there but i was v happy haha:D opera singer! woah. so cool.. tho the actress was really fat. but that camille deveux or watever her name was looks really good.. plus good voice too.. unless that was dubbed. in which i'll feel so disillusioned.

ooh i like my new phone haha. tho i felt rather guilty buying it. hope it'll serve me (and my bro, i assume) well. explorer has conked out on me. grr. now for essays. esp stanford. aargh

ah. 5 hour sleep. but somehow it was a little fragmented. and woke up feeling a bit achey. anyway.. chalet was quite fun. though a lot of stuff could have been done better lar could've thought about food and etc beforehand? but really must thank andrew for coordinating everyth.. esp when u've a class which is as laidback as ours. maybe not laidback but hmm can't be bothered? think slightly more than half the class appeared which is not bad. now to wonder when to have that combined bbq.. aahh. maybe i'll call everyone and ask when they're free. quite difficult lar sigh

anyway ohh yeah pity the weather only cleared up today morning.. past two days was like light drizzle all the time.. quite cold. okay. cool. so ended up playing a lot of bridge. must get changmou to teach more card games.. just that i wun remember how to play them if he's not around haha. that sheepheads thing or watever was really confusing tho i dun blame siewjin for needing a calculator to keep track of points cos i needed one too haha:p maybe dinos are lousy at mental calculations oops

hmm let's see.. oh pool on monday night was rather sad haha kept fouling all over the place.. was really horrendous. at least i think i redeemed myself on tues. i suppose i've gd and bad days. anyway the charge was really crazy.. i wun have gone on monday actually but since everyone went then just go lar.. then second night dun care about the charge already. shud really learn to spend $$ more wisely. n i shud've learnt frm chorale camp that food always gets left over. ah well will try to remember nxt time.

pity didn't get to swim.. apparently the jacuzzi was v nice. and it was nice rooming with aud:) and funny when i woke siewjin up for her soccer match. she mumbled some stuff which i cudn't hear. and i was so puzzled. and ended up asking me " 4 1 2?" or sth like that. was most queer. and amusing.

wait i was going to say sth.. ohh yes really pity shaun haha come to chalet just to get diaoed by all the guys -and- ser. i think the latter is the worst. dasheng probably will agree haha. and we met ms jeanne tan in the downtown east carpark. her take on it? "i thought i saw familiar faces but the guys were acting so childishly so i wasn't sure.." haha.

various quotes. i can't remember other various funny things dasheng said tho.
ser "every morning i eat a piece of milk"
ser on m dremaux her sec 4 french tcher "ses oreilles bleues" [his blue ears. she meant to say his blue eyes]

dasheng, explaining why he was still quite awake at 2sth am even tho he only slept 2 hrs the night before "took a shower then okay already lor"
and apparently he wasn't supposed to sleep yesterday night
so candice suggested he take 40 minute interval showers
dasheng "wah then i'll become a prune lar"

oh and the cat invading our compound. i bet it thought we were trepassing on its territory. so dasheng threatened to strangle it. so when i told mrs cheong she sed "tell dasheng that he may not be able to pay for dead cat" haha. cos he has nets card and was supposed to pay for any damages. rather amusing.

ah i think this is long enough already. shall start worrying about essays again. it was nice to forget abt all that for a while and just slack:) days of mugging seem far behind. tho possibly unforgettable anyway.

i think i've less than an hour before i've to go off again. haha. and my eyes are still half closed. don't think i'll wear contacts today liao. so tired:s now i realise having stayovers consecutively isn't a v smart idea.. oh well. but was quite fun lar haha lots of amusement..

wah and yesterday full day frm 9am to almost 12 is really too much. and still went out walking around aft tt couldn't walk straight anymore. ohh the food at the tea session was the best yet haha. tho i'm still not v tempted to apply to join saf. it was good seeing cheukka tho:p although the hair was shocking. and found 2 nice shops at raffles city! tho i probably can't afford/bear to buy anyth frm there actually. but well. nice to look at.

then grad nite. haha i'm so glad pam was prom queen:) tho now she'd better treat me n chris for standing us up partly to sew her gown. and everyone looked so glad. i half wished i went to do my hair properly too but actually no time also.. i like tiff's curls! haha. but they've disappeared already so sad. and it was quite surprising i ended up taking photos w pple i haven't spoken to for the past 2 years but at least we did lar. quite nice after all. food was okay didn't really like it that much.. but i'm picky. and the deejay's not bad. albeit mean at times. quite happening..

ah i'm too tired to type anymore and i've to pack. and think of wat to get mrs cheong. i hope there's no more mascara left *frowns* although i think i've washed my face like 5 times. the trouble with make-up.

ohh! i forgot to talk about incredibles on .. saturday. haha jack jack is so funny. at the end of the show he scared the bad guy and the family all din noe wat was going on. i was saying violet's lucky cos she has 2 powers [and they seem to be the more useful ones] while the rest have only 1 but maybe tts to make up for her self-esteem heh. and it's somewhat like x-men. powers and fighting bad guys who have powers too. and the machine thingy is like the octavarian guy or watever his name is in spiderman 2. but besides tt it was quite fun:)

arrh i think i'll fall asleep in the car on the way there. gnite zzzzzzzzz.

wahh. poor tired clar. and i really should learn my lesson about doing last minute things. today ate dinner at like 10+ because had to do last minute shopping. at least i've finally gotten all my stuff. one day before the prom? haha. well done clar.

lunch was hilarious.. was really glad lyd came:) provided much amusement. and jane u've the funniest comments/actions. and i finally returned poor chris her saltimbanco vcd [thanks for being so patient:p] always comfortable to be around gd frens:) yayyy happy day. tho bad pam didn't come hmph i will scold her tmr.

anyway. i have to go dig out the quotes from my phone.. here're some i remember anyway
lyd wants bread
jane "u should go to olio dome"
lyd didn't hear her properly "wat?" -bread skids off the tray- "oops". -uses tongs to put bread back-
jane "u should go to olio dome"
lyd looks bemused "but i'm here!"

lyd suggests giving chris an iron for her housewarming
chris "why?"
lyd "aren't u spposed to give useful things for the house at housewarmings?"
chris "oh. i thought u were u insinuating my clothes were crumpled"

haha. so cute. my dearest sec 4 classmates [okay fine jane's not a classmate but as good as lar]
i must organise another outing just for lydia before she whacks me again the next time i meet her.

alright better go pack and everyth. tmr's one busy day.. hope we'll have a fun time. and my uni essays are still half past six/not done.

haha i just browsed thru my blog archives and found that I wrote this on 16 June : “mugging is so tiresome and boring. how i'm going to last until november is a mystery to me.” and it's the start of december already. how time flies. it always seems like forever until it's over and then where has the time gone?

how do i find something unique about myself? sometimes i don't even feel like i know myself. okay these are quite useless questions haha time to think.

haha i just watched save um's on playhouse disney for fun and discovered the show was on a dirty baby dino! haha was most amused. baby dino played in mud and then got all dirty and unhappy.. so its baby sitters had to call the save um's for help. after some fruitless scrubbing, baby dino cried and its tears washed its face clean so yippee they realised water makes dirt turn to mud so its easier to clean off! haha. it was really funny lar. i think i'm deprived k nvm. light amusement.

aiyah. i feel so unoriginal and cliched when i'm writing my essays. i need a better brain. so much for instilling creativity i don't feel like i've any in me. grr. maybe if i buy myself an opal and stare at it the changing colours will inspire me haha. pathetic excuses.

ooh. finally got berkeley app done [terribly last minute i must say, like a lot of things i do:s] and got my gown! haha. i really have expensive taste *shakes head* but was quite funky lar the designer was there and advised on how to wear the gown and stuff like that.. for the moment i felt so rich and pampered haha got personal advisor.. anyway i still have to get necklace and i think i'm done! yay..

anyway. i must say i really don't like last minute thingys. i remember waking up and feeling this horror at the fact that i'd have to get up and face my essay [which is still unsatisfactory actually] AGAIN. oh well at least it's done.. hopefully it got in on time and everyth'll be fine n i didn't waste my money.

and i was the latest for a*star oops. at least i went. better late than never? i hope so anyway. and hardly saw many pple i knew.. looks like most pple are interested in firefly/psc rather than a*star huh. but they're really very sciencey. n tt gal ended up telling us abt illinois instead of a*star.. like trying to promote US education.. like anyone needs to do tt.. everyone wants to go already. i think i've said that b4. oh well. and then i was thinking they really don't bother much about leadership stuff.. some of their presenters were SO soft.. could hardly hear them speaking lar. which makes quite a change from the normal scholarship requirements.

ah i'm so glad taufik won:) he's really versatile. and his voice control is terrific! heh. i thought the show focussed too much on the 2 of them tho i was getting really bored of seeing them only.. wanted to see more of the final 11.. i mean like we've been seeing these 2 for 6 months and the rest for maybe 3 only or so? on average. was nice to see all 11 take to the stage though. miss jeassea and beverly and david. they're really good lar. besides the fact that beverly doesn't seem v gd with public relations heh. anyway i thought jeassea n bev did the independent woman song quite well..

owch. neckache. i shall do more essays tmr. and i shall break the cycle of sleeping past 1am tonight hopefully

ooh. tired. i've been out 3 consecutive days [well, half days?] and i'm quite tired. will be just glad to stay at home tomorrow n sort out my stuff.. and get rest.. haha..

anyway.. planning movie outings is so difficult!! sigh.. okay lar its prob cos i went to sign up for all manner of scholarship tea sessions n got stuff on n etc tts why. no lar actually the fri outing was quite okay. partly cos lijia helped me msg py n joon:) and nxt fri was quite easy too just call all 3. but now i dun even noe if the movie's showing aiyoh:s nvm lar we'll still have fun bumming around:) the good old french immersion days.. scotch-tape cutting skills anybody? ah but none of them read my blog so nvm..

today ah.. ooh i liked lunch loads haha:p it was good eating w everyone:) too bad aud, candice n chelsea weren't around.. wud've been more complete in a way. umm lemme see well pool was funny.. my aiming a bit off today tho heh must be the lack of practice. i wish i had a table like denise [choong]. haha. and her wonderful resort house. but that's out of point. fiona's so cute haha. and ser u're actually quite okay wat i dun see why u keep saying u're lousy.

anyway. yay. tmr is a day at home finally. so funny.. nvm i shall attempt to compile my quotes hopefully. and have a nice slackish time. aiyah am not thinking already.. somehow writing uni app thingies is interesting in a way but tedious in other ways.. i guess it's been a long time since i sat down and wrote non-gp essays haha.

wow. i'm free. it hasn't really set in fully but i'm so glad i don't have to come back and hit the books anymore. for a few months haha:D but chem s wasn't fantastic lar. i shouldn't have spent so much time vacillating about which qn to do and end up leaving so many marks blank. sigh. and i should have done organic 1st instead of panicking at physical cos mind wasn't v clear to start with. hope everyth goes fine tho *prays v hard*

anyway had a few interesting discussions with eunice today while walking around trying to find mom's present. [unsuccessfully i might add]. like how sometimes u don't know if things u remember are just the snapshots that u took, or that u really remember wat u saw there in ur mind. i don't really know how to explain it. and sometimes when you have dreams that are so real, u start to wonder.. what is reality anyway? or i do sometimes at any rate.

and i was telling her that i feel so sorry for children today.. it's like all those pre-school nurturing classes and wat not.. and have to cultivate entrepreneurial spirit so they've to start doing stuff and come up with business ideas and all sorts of rubbish.. there's no joy in being a child! where's the fun gone? do children still know how to play? i mean i remember things like my mom letting me go visit my neighbour and play at her house for a while then must come back n do work later.. or going to the cc with my brother n neighbours to play badminton and stuff like tt.. it doesn't seem like pple do tt nowadays. [okay these i really remember, nothing to do with photos] and they're all stuck to computer games and wat not. but again since i don't have a younger sibiling or anything i wouldn't really know wats happening generally but the impression i get is really sad.

anyway. feels good to be free. i can finally sleep without worrying [hopefully] and wake up anytime i like! woohoo!~ i have been forcing myself to sleep less for these past few weeks i think. out of desperation. i really hope it pays off. sometimes i really think wat emilyn said is right: here, mediocrity is a sin.

ok lar shouldn't be so melancholic. ka [new show by cirque du soleil] opens today! woohoo!~ maybe that's a good sign for me:) i shall order their cd. or maybe i should make my bro buy for me haha perhaps shipping within usa is easier. anyway. happiness! for now anyway;)

argh. horrible biotech paper yesterday - i was laughing while thinking of how to explain for 3 marks how one colouring is extracted from a named organism. i think the girl sitting nxt to me frm 3e i think? must have thought i'd gone berserk. anyway i ended up writing something really vague about crushing cochineal beetles so maybe they'll be kind and gimme 2 marks for that? haha. crazy cambridge lar how'd u expect us to know.. maybe if we write something halfway sensible they'll be satisfied.

now for math s. sigh. i can't believe how stupid i was.. not to realise how to do integration by substitution until time was up. and forgetting mr chan's nicely-stapled paper on my stats assignment! crumbs.. tt'd have cost me like 5 marks or sth. this is not a time when one can afford to forget things, given i didn't do that many marks in the 1st place. anyway. i'm just praying i get an m at least.. sigh. shattered dreams. there's only chem s left to dream about. and work for.

so i've 4 more papers. and then i'm finally free! but there's physics to get thru 1st, bio to pull up my so far horrendous papers. aahh. disillusioned. i think i'm going to get constant nightmares about horrible results. which hopefully won't materialise. i'd prefer my results to be a pleasant surprise thanks very much.

but it was nice to see yongjeng today, been ages since i met choir j1s.. tho i kinda pity them for 5 o'clock pracs during holidays heh. but again they've the whole day to slack so why'm i being sympathetic? haha. and can go for supper aft tt somemore. k it's not such a bad deal aft all.

ohh i had this weird dream about choir 2 days back i think. j2s went back to join j1s and then din memorise songs properly so the lyrics all disappeared. it was quite terrible actually. and i thought ms low/mr toh were going to start scolding and then i can't remember wat else happened. and yest's weird dream was connected to the 7o'clock ch8 show. and somehow there were labrador/golden retriever puppies featured haha. sth like quill. very queer.. must be my overstressed mind.

hmm. i think i'm very harsh on myself. i was really really fuming at myself some time after the malay woman said no more writing.. cos i realised how stupid i was putting an obviously wrong answer for the zinc+acid thing. gah. then later whined to serene and fiona whined to me then felt bit better knowing i'm not the only one who screwed up. haha. anyway. last week! it's [to quote ser] a frightening week though. as it was yesterday i was suddenly thinking wat if nxt yr i go get results and end up with b's n c's then i'm done for. aiyah. everyth's worrying. just pray and pray and pray that everyth'll end up fine.

yeah. frightening week of bio paper 3 + phys paper 3 [i really hope these go better than the paper 2] + 2 s papers + phys design [i hope these go better than prelims if not i'm done for also] + bio mcq. sigh. i foresee a stressful week. at least after that we'll be free. in a way. haha. then i'll have to do berkeley apps already:s super last minute lar oh well wat to do.

and then i shall go buy myself lots of cds haha:D and new clothes and such. oh yes and i'll have to get myself to exercise if not i can't fit into my clothes anymore with all the snacking.

oh i heard the ben1 track frm sun yan zi's new cd on the advert.. it's a bit rockish or sth? i should really learn to differentiate btwn the genres. anyway it's so unlike her. but it's different. quite interesting.

ooh i've also decided i like songs frm musicals.. this is the moment frm dr jekyll n mr hyde! that taufik sang yesterday.. oh sly's performance of music of the night was really sad lar.. cannot make it lar go sing chinese pop.

okay since i haven't blogged since saturday here i am. wasn't planning to blog actually but nevermind. physics was rather nightmarish. okay it wasn't that bad but wasn't fantastic. maybe cos i didn't prepare v well hum. and was slightly panicky. and rusty. and therefore unsure of answers.

anyway like i always say, ignorance is bliss. how'd you know the majority's correct anyway? i think tt was my philosophy for o's and recently readopted thanks to weiying's advice haha:D to quote her she "always runs away after exams" so can't compare answers.

ahh. i want to go out. i decided peiying's way of looking at everyth is quite good haha. she told me while waiting for parents to come. there's only one week left! and after that we've 9 months before going back to school haha. [even tho i was predisposed to taking the gloomy view and telling her we've to do biotech n s papers this weekend]

yesterday was napping at 1+ [pm] and didn't wanna get up! so comfy:) and then it started raining later. hais. but i had to get up cos my physics was half baked. i'm not sure it isn't now sigh. it's such a joke sometimes all you learn for 2 years and they don't test u on half of it anyway. maybe they should come up with other ways besides exams to gauge abilities and i don't mean project work. i remember this essay in the gp bulletin about how exams aren't a true reflection of how well the student will be able to cope in the working world. so so true.

anyway enough of exams.. freedom! sigh. lucky candice's sister.. her last paper is tmr! incidentally it's also chem mcq. i think i'll always remember 26 nov. end of o levels in the afternoon. and now end of a levels in the evening too. of cos it's also candice[cheng]'s bday haha. haven't seen her in ages!

oh surprisingly i think i'll miss rj. kind of. and our crazy lessons n teachers n classmates n lecturers. not in that order though. i shall compile my quotes. oh here's one i found rather amusing [sorry ser:p]
in sec 4: bio teacher mrs lee asks "wat precautions should you take while counting bubbles?"
ser "don't blink"

lemme go dig out a few more to amuse myself
ohh here's another. during farewell assembly i was sitting with sarah n her bball fren then mr chan [math] walked past. n sarah's fren asked "Mr chan why checkered shirt today ah?" then he replied [quick as lightning i might add] "graph paper"
it was really apt cos it was a white shirt with black (or grey or sth) lines criss-crossing. ah basically it really did look like graph paper with huge squares haha.

one day during bio lect: ser "don't you think candice looks like a christmas tree in red (her sweater) and green (RJ skirt)?"
candice turns around "i HEARD that"
me "being angry won't make you look any less like a christmas tree" [at this pt fiona i think scolded me for being mean. but let me defend myself, i didn't agree with ser, i was just making a point:]

eunice while presenting current affairs about civet cats with SARS in china [this was last yr]
"you kill it while it's alive"

last one for the day.. mr chan [bio] 's view on our Mt Sinai campus being used for NUS High Sch or whoever it is.. "it's a mighty big school for 100 students.. you could literally stuff one student in each toilet!"

was extremely annoyed this morning.. i think i woke up at 6 and then 8 and finally 9.30. was terribly annoyed cos i couldn't sleep properly due to itchy mosquito bites.. got up.. my mom made me eat sweet potato for breakfast [and i absolutely hate it] and then i went to put on insect repellent to prevent repeat of the mosquito bites.. ended up getting some on my watch which caused part of the strap to dissolve.. which served to anger me further.. there's really nothing like waking up on the wrong side of the bed. anyway so i had to avoid touching anything plastic and was getting v paranoid abt stuff. and very frustrated.

at least i think i'm fine now after eating my ice cream n listening to some music [i shall go buy somemore cds aft a's! haha.. have just discovered nice new site - www.soothingmusic.com i haven't figured out wat the track playing is though]

aiyah! i'm so annoyed at math... can't believe i just assumed it was finding inverse instead of derivative and didn't realise even when wondering why the range was asked only later.. ugh.. sometimes i'm SO smart. bah. and bio was not nice. i figured i mite end up with 71 for the paper! groan. this is partly audry's fault for worrying and influencing me. haha.

yay i finally got lots of sleep for the first time in weeks, decided if i dun sleep i mite end up sick n tts certainly not good. i suddenly feel melancholic too haha. i want to buy all the cirque du soleil music cds. well maybe not all lar only those which are good:D

was listening to e piano concert cd frm eons ago.. such memories haha. okay wasn't eons lar but 3 yrs is quite a bit. i havent' played piano for months i realise.. better practise hard after a's haha. i think my fingers have lost any agility they ever possessed.. typing is just not the same.

alright better stop slacking. on monday night while mugging bio/math i suddenly felt like going shopping! haha. but then when i go shopping i'll be bored anyway. weird clar. and then last night i was reading excerpts frm gerald durrell on the nice food and started thinking i wanted to learn how to cook yummy things n told my mom then she sed i wudn't feel like cooking if it's just for myself so i should go be a chef. which is true so i think when i want nice food i'll just buy it haha. so lazy. oh well. but true it's not efficient to spend all the time/energy getting ingredients and cooking and having to wash up then only one person eats.

feel v restless. and my bill is going to be astronomical this month! augh. as it it i've passed the 300 mark and it's only 10th of nov. partly cos i get bored. haha. then suddenly i'll get sick of smsing. and then my phone buttons aren't responding properly particularly the 7 button. most annoying. time for new phone! after a's

aughhh i dont know wat i'm going to do if results're not good lar. sigh. and it's not like i'm not trying my best. i think? haha. dunno lar. and i miss everyone. how tragic.

ugh i seem to have a problem with my sleep pattern. nap in afternoon, spend one hr slacking b4 i sleep, end up waking up at 7.30 cos it's so freaking bright, get v angry n refuse to wake up so early, try to sleep until 9sth, wake up still v unhappy. i shall attempt to change that today if not i'll be annoyed the whole week. i mean, when one can't even sleep in peace it's time to do something about it.

i suppose i kind of slept my worries away but i think they' re going to come back today when i rediscover my incompetency in tackling a level problems. sigh. no matterin which subject. very tedious. being cooped up within 4 walls does things to you. and yes i know it's my fault for not wanting to exercise either haha well.

anyway so cool! yahoo has a special banner for halloween. if that's wat u call it. i saved the pic yay:D quite a funky gif.

i was just thinking about "o" by cirque du soleil. it is truly a work of art. and then i'm thinking why isn't it possible not to work and just enjoy. but i guess one'd get sick of it after a while. and i think my perceptions of work are too hollywood-based. the power of the media. and sometimes when i'm pessimistic it feels like happiness wasn't meant for me. but of cos tts only cos i'm stuck mugging for the nxt month as usual.

wat a train of disjointed thoughts. so what has 2 yrs of jc given me? i really wonder.. esp tt day i was reading my autographs. i think i've said it before though. i seem to have changed. and not necessarily for the better. so much for never-ending patience and such. or maybe pple just write things that sound nice. nowadays i get annoyed at the slightest things so easily. though i may not necessarily show it. well maybe i'll be fine after everyth is done with.

comment on spore idol: it's quite pathetic actually.. the judges are like solitary individuals sitting there.. they've no camaraderie so it's really boring when they're commenting. i mean the show's about the singers [who aren't actually that wonderful either haha sadly] but it's also about the host [who isn't fantastic but probably one of the best one can find here] and the judges and how they interact. big problem: they don't interact. in my opinion anyway. i was trying to figure out why idol gets stale. and the themes are boring/singers can't bring the style out v well.

okay i should stop complaining. i think chem prac gave me a headache.

i'm so dead. kinda like equate not finishing a paper to suicide, especially when it's a's. i hate double indicators.. didn't know where the end point was.. am just praying that i estimated correctly.. the 2 tables make up 15marks lar if my accuracy's gone i'm done for.. esp when i didnt' finish both designs.. which is like 8marks gone. and i dunno if my qa is correct, anyhow whacked.

alrite i feel a bit better after complaining to lots of pple. thanks everyone:)

blah. these few days i've not felt like waking up. just want to sleep and sleep and forget about all the nasty things. dont' feel like doing anything. maybe it'll disappear after monday.

but really after a's i'll be probably stuck at home doing uni apps/scholarship apps anyway. bleah. it'll never end. oh and yesterday i suddenly thought of the shops at metro stations overseas [actually it was specifically those in france] and missed france + immersion all over again. quite weird the way things just appear in my mind sometimes. i want a holiday again! heh. wishful thinking. there's a long way to go before holidays come. hais.

oh and i've been in the "i'm studying for prelims" mode for so long that i still keep thinking its prelims. although i think somewhere in the back of my mind i noe it's a's.. but the 1st thing tt comes to mind is still prelims.

the pure cinema chillout cd my dad got for free is quite nice!:D recognise some songs frm opera band/bond though.. the way they copy songs is scandalous. okay i suppose it's called modifying but watever it just seemed like copying to me at the moment.

i think i'm never satisfied. that's gd and bad. rowls. i've realised taking photos is actually quite fun.. memories and such? anyway the way baoyi posts all her pics on her blog is quite cool:)

bio prac was disastrous. i don't think i was thinking v clearly. if not i wudn't have drawn the wrong genetic diagram.. can't believe how stupid i was. and started panicking. this paper was kinda unexpected somehow.. only 1 slide. somehow feel like prelims were better. which is not good. esp cos this prac had a lot of open-ended qns, meaning there's a whole lot more room for deduction when u don't explain enough. which is v likely to happen given how i always miss out on main points/keywords.

yeah. and instead of drawing tissue map i drew in the nuclei as well.. forgot lar. totally screwed. let me see wat else.. my tube 4 didn't change colour so i faked a bit at the end. watever lar. not my problem it didn't wanna change. and then all the explanation things.. yeah.. possibly will minus quite a few marks. and that explaining why rice grains don't have same length. i forgot sec 4 work lar stuff abt how it's frm diff plants and wat not. just vaguely talked abt e minor genes and environmental conditions. totally sucky. sigh.

that just about sums it up, some parts of each qn are all screwed. yup. so lovely.

hum. i will learn to do things more in advance in the future. this always happens. but anyway farewell assembly was alright lar. not fantastic. tho i dunno wat i expected. it was so so hot in the hall.. boring.. and i was getting a headache towards the middle of the thing.. but john made a really gd speech though. at least my interest was held. or maybe i'm biased. but whatever it is i think he'll achieve a lot.

umm. yeah. spent the 1st part of the evening rushing about madly getting last minute uni app stuff done. and now i realised something else which might give me some problems. baah. pray for help. worries abound! what to do.

i hope my photos get developed soon. haha pity the one with the guys is in the new roll and won't be developed for some time.. hope it turns out nice! dunno if we moved when serene took the picture. and i think sarah sed me n mrs cheong look alike. humm. i suppose it's the ponytail haha.

today was a bit awkward actually. also partly cos i was sleepy [dunno how come though]. haven't talked to them for a long time so felt a bit weird. anyway i came home and slept a LOT. sigh. my energy level leaves much to be desired.

oh! i din noe smrt took over trans island oops. anyway. the doorbell or watever u call it on the bus was getting on my nerves.. its so loud and jangly and ummm cacophonous. dissonant! yeah that was is. here i was trying to sleep [the seat was rather uncomfortable too i shud bring a pillow w me everywhere i go haha] but every few stops i'd be rudely jarred awake. now tt doesn't sound grammatically correct but nvm. dinnertime. wish i hadn't slept so much if not maybe we'd had gone out to eat jap food. heh.

ahh. haven't found time to sit down and blog abt yesterday. apart from slightly screwing up sats and very uptight while doing the papers it was a nice day!:) whee~

mamma mia was wonderful!!! haha. -goes into ecstasies- come to think of it i can't really pinpoint wat was so good. but i dunno.. the energy level was v high.. e singers/actors were superb [altho i din like the guys playing the dads] and i figured esther hannaford played sophie cos it was matinee performance.. but her voice is nice! and she's a really gd dancer.. wud have liked to see kellie rode act too tho o well can't have everyth..

anyway like i was telling candice i was disillusioned by the cd! sigh. london cast doesn't sound as good as australian cast:( maybe cos of the way it's recorded or sth.. quite sad. but now i'm hooked on abba songs haha they're quite funky actually:D yay

thankew everyone for ur bday wishes!:) and presents! haha. clar is a v happy gal:) [apart frm worrying abt a's / uni apps]

ooh. pleasant surprises:) didn't expect half of my presents.. but thank you everybody:)

unfortunately i woke up worrying about my sat 2s cos i don't feel particularly well prepared for them and i cannot deprove from may sats. bleah. and then mrs lim says she's overloaded with recommendations and can't write for me. or rather, will only write if it's absolutely necessary. therefore i am in a fix. which is of cos, my fault as usual. and as usual, i regret a lot of things. really the amount of things i regret is innumerable. and now i'm wondering if amount is singular or plural.. aaargh.

nvm tmr i'm watching mamma mia! whee~:) n there's this dim sum thingy which i don't know when it will take place [somehow that sentence sounds grammatically incorrect to me too] i shouldn't be such a busy person.. oh well. wat to do. i should go and do something constructive. been sleeping the week away!

humm. i guess i'm satisfied. just pray they won't moderate such that my grades drop. yeah. of cos it would be nice if they moderate phys by a LOT. but i guess that isn't going to happen unless i'm really lucky. so well. i'm okay i guess. not fantastic but passable.

so. everything's done and its back to mugging. seems like we never had much of a break. but what can i say.. such is the life of any jc2 student right now i guess. i shall go swim. for once in dunno how many weeks. or months.

how now brown cow. i'm wondering wat a merit for chem s is now.. to miss it by 2 marks would be hell. if only i could transfer marks from math over to chem s/phys/chem in that order of increasing marks needed. so much for the math mark.. it doesn't seem to make up for everyth else. i don't know lar. tmr bio n math s. wat's betting i'll end up with another ungraded. it's so unfair. but what else did i expect come to think of it.

aiyah nvm i guess i'm just full of ill feeling. tho yes, it probably won't matter in the long run. but how'm i going to apply to uni like that? bleahhh. its not good to expect too much of urself sometimes. disappointment is too severe. fall down frm the clouds with a huge plop. the harsh sound of reality.

maybe i should go think about maths. but wat's the pt? aceing math c doesn't equal aceing math s. ah watever it's all decided already anyway. hopeless. watever. i'll go do something else. and am extremely tired n headachey. why in the world i chose to do sats this sat is a mystery to me. horrible bday week.

the aura of depression. i suppose my marks were actually quite okay but its more like wat else i'm going to see tmr. worried for phys and bio. and s papers:s i guess i can't really do anyth about them. but am really quite relieved for gp. n chem was. well. expected i suppose. given that i realise i spent most of my time on phys/bio. hope i do fine.

and there's something else which is bugging me. which i can't exactly blog. but well. i wonder if we really deserved that. i hope it doesn't affect my recommendations hmm not that they're going to be spectacular in the 1st place. dunno how also lar probably end up staying here n doing med/law at the rate everything is going.

had a fun time w lyd chris pam py yest:) luckily i don't think i'm burnt haha cream helps:D if not i'd end up with a red nose/cheeks/forehead today.. i wanted to see dolphins tho! oh well. but cost like $17.50 n i dun think anyone else wud've wanted to spend the $$. pity.

lyd's so cute.. cos we saw lots of dogs at siloso beach n i was delighted at seeing this v cute labrador in the water n she sed "i'm sorry u dun have a dog.. nxt time when i'm rich i'll buy u one.." something to that effect anyway. n candice thinks she should buy me one for my bday too. oh well. and there was the lyd-bullying-pam-into-buying-subway-cookie for us and lyd-whining-at-pam-to-buy-her-mango-pudding incident..

really silly. while me n chris had to listen to pam's silly taxi driver ghost story twice and peiying throwing her cherish tissue at pam. the cat-stuck-under-the-wardrobe story was funnier than the ghost story i think. i've a bunch of sec sch classmates as silly as i am haha:p nice feeling. pity joon n lijia n claire didn't come..

feeling rather out of sorts. lots to think about. i figured i only think when i'm sitting in the car actually. okay fine during journeys.

quote from church bulletin today. "those of great minds discuss ideas, people of mediocre minds discuss events and those of smaller minds discuss other people" frm god's psychiatry by dr charles allen. interesting isn't it. room for discussion alright.

let me go try cheer myself up. i think its the anticipation of my impending doom that has affected my mood. hmm.

hmm. finally free. and i don't feel any happier. worrying abt wat i'm going to get for chem s. and normal chem. feel like i left a whole lot more blanks than anyone else. dunno lar. and i forgot wat i studied. how typical. dread nxt week:(

anyway.. so went w eunice to town n had lunch.. haha i was spouting so much rubbish i bet she'll be complaining on mon to candice abt how crazy clar was :p oh well. post prelim stress. anyway was v tempted to buy a harp or a choral cd. but couldn't decide [wat's new] so gave up the idea.

hmm. okay i finally bought my hair stuff.. which i've been needing for months but never got round to it cos i've been cooped up at home. the only times i leave the house = sundays to go to church or to go to sch on exam days/mugging days.

quite bored actually. think reading will alleviate that. and for once i can watch whole of spore idol tonite! yeah!!:):) haha. i keep calling it american idol somehow.. dunno.. out of habit i sppose. oh well. i like daphne!:) she has a unique voice anyhow. hope she sings a nice song tonight:) maia n jeassea are funky too.

oh i saw the ad for shark tale! if that's the name hmm. it looks quite cute:) and i saw the storybook at borders.. but i wanted to see the pics more than read the story.. too wordy. haha. but it seems too much like monsters inc/finding nemo. dunno. will see how. i never intended to watch finding nemo until i read the review. oh i saw the quill vcd at kino!:) v happy:D haha. oh princess diaries 2 looks promising too. but i bet it'll come out during a's sigh will be stuck at home mugging AGAIN. so sick of it. but it doesn't seem like i've been doing much. so how? hais.

oh yeah and was talking to eunice on the bus.. figured that all the tv shows and movies are so formulaic nowadays. like. reality tv shows are the only things showing and i really hate them. besides idol. haha. and then shows like white chick. it's not the 1st time u've guys cross dressing.. now skin colour changes too. quite sick.. and pathetic toilet humour.. really doesn't cut it.

the most impt thing and i forgot!! i was utterly horrified today... at borders.. i really shouldn't wander around bookshops alone in sch u hmm.. anyway.. i was trying to look for some wodgehouse book to see wat's it all abt.. and then while staring at the bookshelf.. this face suddenly popped up in front of me and started singing. how absolutely ghastly. i was wondering why this psycho had to approach poor defenseless ME of all pple and looked around desperately for help. i had this vague idea tt maybe some assistant could get rid of this nutcase for me. but anyway.. after a while i recognised the tune of the sch song and therefore laughed politely and retreated back one/two steps. and this guy bombarded me with all sorts of qns :
"pre u wat?" "on scholarship?" "going to apply for scholarship?" "going to university?" "wat course?" "how many 1's for o's?"
he looked like around 50 to me.

wasn't really intending to blog but clicked wrongly n ended up here so i guess i'll blog anyway haha. woke up at like 10.30 (such a pig) went to sch to mug. woahhh my knowledge is sadly lacking.. feel it more acutely when i'm sitting nxt to yz who'll probably top the chem s paper with flying colours.. i told him i'd pay him to take my papers for me:D

i just can't apply knowledge. failure student. haha. so much for education in the correct sense. actually maybe i'm just too lazy to think. which is very probable. costs too much energy to exert myself. haha. okay i sound like a real pig. which i am sometimes. oh well. must switch.. where's my fairy godmother when i need one?

ohh. and pple are scary. restarting mugging so fast. when all i want to do is burn up all my files and never look at them anymore [unless its to compile quotes:p]. but i suppose when i get back my prelim papers i will have to mug whether i want to or not. sigh. an interminable 2 months [minus 2 days] left.

i need a change in attitude fast. how bout a break? i think tt'll work. just wait till thurs.. and sat! haha. gd ole lyd. so cute. let's go rollerblading! ok! and we're settled. i can't believe aud sed she has to get back by 12 to watch liu xing hua yuan tho. at least she isn't a fan of f4. reminds me of tt incredibly bad joke dr chan made last yr during chem prac abt "wat's half of f9?" or sth like that. if only i had such a gd memory for academics.

i think i want to eat waffles [w ice cream! haha bet cheukka will laugh she sed i'm such a little gal.. always wanting to eat ice cream. oh well. its nice wat:] on thursday.. ooh am listening to tracks frm candice's acapella cd. the harmony is so lovely.

alrite i have to go read organic chem again. my lack of knowledge is really appalling. and i really don't like inorganic chem. eew: =shudders=

oh. joke i found on my chem s bklet
eunice "i think i'm going nuts!"
raphael "then squirrels will love you"

haha. math s. wat a joke. i wanted to walk out of the hall at 9.30am/just give up. looked all the qns all can't do! how? also managed to make a whole lot of spastic mistakes n totally confused myself. well done clar. and surprisingly i managed to rush out the vectors qn in like 15mins and i think it's correct. *prays* most of my qns were half done. or less than half done for that matter. let's see. i finished the qn 1, 5 and 11. that's about it. yay.

i just hope i don't get ungraded.

now for chem s. the list of organic reactions is so long i regret not studying earlier. regret is a terrible feeling. which has been plagueing me since prelims started. wat a lesson to learn. at least s papers are slightly less stressful than main papers i think. hmm. tho very much harder such that even if you have the time it isn't always helpful

haha today's class was funny. i feel quite bad actually keep laughing and not listening properly. but i can figure out for myself wat he's trying to say. and i write down watever which makes sense/answers the qn. and then i dunno lar.. just don't like it when tchers don't prep properly b4 coming in and then end up with us all confused. okay to be fair i think he did his best but well just realised i get quite annoyed by inept tchers. i suppose at least if you try yr best that'll be the minimum to do.

anyway i really wonder if they didn't laugh that much last week. and if so because i wasn't around. oh well. but really.. it's not my fault eunice comes n tells us about her picture bible with the picture of the beam in a boy's eye a.k.a. a branch sticking out of the boy's eye with LEAVES! hahaha. daryl decided it'll be a tree. so i asked "where'll the roots go?" and they came up with all sorts of gruesome possibilities. like roots wrapping around the eyeball and all that. they're so cute. anyway the laughing put me in a gd mood haha so am happy now! now to attack math s. hais.

oh i suddenly dreamt of rg last nite must be cos of em's post. anyhow i miss mrs kwan so much. i think it's because she really cares. and she believes in you when you don't believe in yourself. which happens so many times in jc it's difficult to count. when everything comes crashing down. even tho we used to complain abt her nagging in rg now it's different. not that mrs cheong's not nice.. she's probably the best ct one could hope for:) oh n i miss laoshi too. all the times i had extra lessons with her heh.

anyway better take advantage of my good mood and go attack my math s with a vengeance. thanks to everyth who msged to tell me to take care! feel much much better and can eat properly liao tho still not v much:) which is also good. haha.

hmm. i wonder wat everyone's doing now. for at least half of my batchmates' prelims are over.. it doesn't feel like that to me. anyway. i must say i derived some sort of sadistic pleasure [for a while.. after tt it got too painful haha] frm seeing the numbers on my thermometer skip and wondering how far it would go. so the highest i reached was 39.1! fantastic huh. and half the time i don't even noe when i've a fever. most interesting. like i'll just be thinking "okay my head hurts wat's new" and then mom will come n touch my forehead and exclaim n make me take my temp.

oh yeah and wed nite was awfully torturous, stomach was so queasy i couldn't sleep properly.. for the 1st 4 hrs formulae were chasing themselves around my head.. dreamt tt i cudn't do my chem/math s prelims nxt week.. so finally woke up and ended up vomitting. spontaneous expulsion. and after that still couldn't sleep properly cos my feet were numb. weirdly. finally went to see doc the nxt morning cos i cudn't eat/drink anyth w/o vomitting..

injection helped, medicine did too. the wonders of medicine. within 15mins of taking the fever medicine my temp went down! ah. anyway. hope bio was alrite even tho i was still slightly woozy:s i spent most of yest sleeping i think. had to wake up early to study [with a headache again n didn't noe i had a fever until mom came along haha i'm quite hopeless]

spent most of yesterday and today sleeping. haha. such a pig. o well.

i wish i could just throw down everyth and go somewhere else. WHY does this have to happen.. i can practically see all the horrible grades now.. it also doesn't help that shaun told me tt paper 2 chem's spposed to be harder than paper 3. which was actually supposed to be easy. therefore i'm even more dead. and chem s? haha. forget about it. i can see why serene wanted to get into an accident b4 prelims haha.

biotech. it also wud have been okay if i'd looked thru industrial biotech last night instead of flipping thru this morning. n focussing so much on med last nite. cos i ended up mixing up the microorganisms. so my essay's totally screwed. and i din write abt disadvantages of enzyme immobilisation. but how else? i dunno if i cud have remembered 8m worth of seed bank or crap out 12m worth of ethics in biotech. maybe i cud. then there's another wrong decision. seem to have no lack of them nowadays.

i really dread the weeks after prelims. which equals to time to get back results. i can't bear to not improve frm last common tests but now it seems so impossible. talk about nightmares of all the worst case scenarios. n i'll still have to pull myself back to study for sats. actually if i get horrible results there won't be much point doing sats. hmm. waste $$ only. n i'm in desperate need of sleep.

this is not the 1st time i wish we cud fast foward to nxt yr sept in an ideal situation: time to go off to some nice uni.

bah. so far i think math was the only okay paper. now that i think about it, i've no idea wat i've been doing for the past 2(?) months. i thought i was revising but can't seem to remember much, everyth's so fuzzy.

chem was a disaster. was really in the depths of despair yesterday. bio wasn't much better. even though i thought it ought to have been better after all the time i spent catching up [and neglecting chem and i'm going to pay for that. a really high price. considering i conveniently forgot chem dept sets the most killer papers] my stupidity astounds me. i really don't noe wat's wrong.. maybe i didn't practise enough or sth. then wat've i been doing? don't know.

yeah and now time management problem is back. i thought i'd figured that out for the last 2 common tests but now its a whole new format and everyth's back where it began. last yr's common test. my prelim grades had better be much better than those grades though. it's like zhini said. u walk out of the exam hall and "rite. so that was a prelim paper." a.k.a. superbly dead. don't know what to do. all the papers seem so screwed up. n i still have 2.5 more weeks to go.

and s papers! haha. those i'm even more dead for. i really need divine intervention... wanna quit sch now

bah. don't feel particularly well yet my thermometer tells me i'm fine. general malaise. maybe it's the haze haha. everyone was sniffing today. well alot of pple anyway.

anyway i felt kind of sorry for bible class tcher today.. his 1st time teaching us and the lesson seemed to be turning into a joke. he was teaching on sin and suddenly came up with a proverb on how "you can't stop the bird from shitting on you but u can stop it frm building a nest on ur head". now what that was supposed to illustrate still eludes me, but it was really funny somehow. and i wonder where it originated from [if it is a true proverb hum] if anyone knows please enlighten me

and then later he started talking about how an egg has microscopic holes in the shell.. for wat? jasmine ventures an explanation : to respire? which set me off in a fit of silent laughter again. partly cos i didn't noe why he suddenly mentioned an egg, and partly bcos i suddenly visualised this egg living and breathing [excluding the embryo i mean]. sort of reminded me of tjh's qn in sec 4 abt whether babies had gills to breathe.

anyway so later one of my bible classmates remarked in an undertone "does he like birds a lot? just now talk abt birds, now talk abt eggs". helpless laughter. n e fren nxt to me [who happens to be called daryl haha] apologised for killing me [by making me laugh at various silly things such as complaining tt she was hungry aft he mentioned eggs and wanting to volunteer to read verses in a dramatic manner - apparently she's in drama club so hmm okay]

yeah i thought we weren't being v gd students. like. were laughing at his pronunciation sometimes which actually is kind of unfair but o dear cudn't help it. enticed became "enteesed" and such. feel quite bad abt it lar i cudn't stop laughing half the time. hopefully he didn't notice:s

oh yar and last week another tcher told us about how some pple have mysterious lord's supper. they apparently have lord's supper in a garden. they go and hide in the bushes. and run out and take the lord's supper and rush back into the bushes. cos last time christians were persecuted they had to hide in the caves [somewhere in hebrews] so they commemorate it or sth. his description was quite graphic. said they find it very exciting.

i guess my imagination was particularly graphic cos i was the most amused. i mean. thinking of pple crouched in the bushes, bright and beady-eyed like chipmunks waiting for their chance to steal nuts, scurrying out and back into the safety of the bushes.

okay i hope i didnt insult anyone here. one never knows.

ohh the french choir show was quite nice.. tho i thot they shud have gone for a competition like sister's act but well. yeah. kinda similar to sister's act actually. and when i heard the choir.. was swamped by this bout of choir-sickness. and the boy sop! ahh. i mean not perfect but so crystal clear.

hais. bio was actually an okay paper. if i'd prepared adequately for it. and read instructions properly. can't believe i didn't suspect something was wrong with the hydrogen peroxide-filter paper expt and ended up faking results. [faked wrongly sort of.. given that my timings were totally off] well maybe they'll give me sympathy marks.

seem to be taking this as just a prep. but i can't do that! bcos it matters! which my bro was trying to drill into me that day. aagh. i shall go take a nap. cheukka's rite, prelims wun matter nxt time. but rite now it certainly doesn't seem like it. esp when i manage to screw up everyth possible.

its so funny how pple used to say they wish i had my self discipline/patience. i don't feel like i possess either of these attributes anymore. maybe i used to 2 years ago. but now? nvm.. off i go to sleep

haha. so it just gets worse and worse. did i actually expect otherwise? *hollow laughs* well done clar u're definitely staying in spore if this goes on.. i'll probably have to get full marks for the rest of my papers rofl. which is impossible. so i'm done for. haha. yay!

oh raphael was hilarious.. while we were waiting for our shift in the hall then he was saying sth abt committing suicide if he couldn't do the chem prac.. [i.e. can't get the gas] break the burette and slash his wrist.. then fiona sed drink hexane.. haha.. then raphael said he'll switch on the gas tap.. "if i can't do the chem prac nobody will!" then later he improvised and said after switching on the gas tap he'll light the lighter [if that's the correct word] and boom! haha. no more sch. yay:)

anyway. so i made a superbly stupid mistake which will cost me at least 6 marks unless there's e.c.f. which is quite unlikely. and didn't finish the qa design. i think she sed we weren't spposed to write no visible reaction but i had no idea wat else to write. so maybe that's more marks gone. and then dunno how to present properly for kinetics reaction. qa didn't fill up quite a few of the deductions cos dunno wat's going on.. i've never seen bright green ppt in my life.. i mean okay fine there's blue frm copper and then wat else?? i don't think i've ever felt so desperate in my life [unless it was during phys prac last fri] when i got n = 34.

freak. i'm so dead. time to celebrate.

hmm most interesting day. firefly purposely puts the talks on education on germany/japan/china 1st so pple're forced to listen to them.. and then psc has like a 1.5 h video plus "talk-show by scholars" thingy and oh we're left off to have tea [curry puff n eclairs]. the ironic thing is that they keep trying to persuade pple to go overseas. of cos everyone wants to go overseas its a question of who can get in/who can get the means to go there... sigh.

and didn't really get to know about wat they actually do in the psc or in their various depts. okay besides the police guy who was quite detailed. ah. anyway.

after firefly mom picked me up and informed me that this guy came to get his comp repaired [apparently dad responded to some qn on a forum.. this guy wanted spare parts for a psion or sth] and brought his family along w/o informing my dad prior to it. actually i found it rather amusing at 1st tt my mom was faced with 3 extra pple to entertain but tt certainly changed when i got home.

so. opened the door and found 4 strangers in my house. -mildly annoyed- i mean isn't it like basic courtesy to tell pple [esp pple u don't even noe] u're gonna bring 3 extra pple along.. i've never heard of people bringing their family along to a stranger's hse.

so here we have 2 little boys [4 n 10 yrs old] who have nothing to occupy themselves with and therefore argue about which tv channel to watch [and make a lot of noise in the process] and a mom sitting on the sofa reading newspapers and a dad sitting at the dining table fiddling around with his phone. my house has been successfully invaded.

and then there was nothing for them to eat or drink or watever cos my mom din noe they were coming. n heard one of the boys say he wanted to open the fridge and find something to eat. erps. rite. at least they went off to the playground for a while. ended up eating lunch in bro's room. bah. on a side note i realised the illiad is really kind of hard to plough through. the overall storyline seems easier to understand heh.

anyhow they finally disappeared. yay. haha i sound so unhospitable. but really.. this is too much. like violation of human rights haha. maybe that's not the right word but i can't think of it at the moment. maybe i feel too strongly about stuff.

oh and i noe why i thought abt cirque du soleil. its like performance at its finest. but of cos behind the scenes there're lots of problems too just that you don't noe when you watch the show. all you see is the final product that has been honed to perfection. something i remembered from when i watched the making of varekai.

okay i've blogged such a long entry like there're no prelims better stop soon. am reading the nat'l day rally online and boy is spore gd at acronyms.. i've found 4 acronyms which i don't noe what they stand for.. and i'm hardly halfway thru reading. gets kind of annoying sometimes.

talk about a disastrous prac.. nightmare!!! arggh. i don't think i've ever had a worse one. stupid pendulum.. spent 20mins trying to tie the stupid thing [while sweating profusely cos fan wasn't on cos it was oscillations] and couldn't so i gave up n drew the table 1st.. went back to attacking the string and such.. in the end made so many mistakes.. such that after i discovered them i wrote them down so i'll remember not to do such stupid things for a level pracs. sigh.

watever.. i hope i do decently.. my dreams seem to be slipping away already with one exam down. haha. well done clar. oh and like andrew said.. phys prac is usually spposed to be the easiest.. and they kill us for it.. wat're chem n bio pracs gonna be like? n i haven't studied yet. *hollow laughs*

but it was quite cool lar today while we were waiting in LT5 someone frm jane's class taped singapore idol [hmm i keep typing american idol somehow] last nite n we watched a bit of it b4 being released. somehow i was thinking abt cirque du soleil. run away and join the circus! haha.

suddenly feel like listening to my enigma songs again. there's sth abt the drums/bass beat or watever u call it. wish i knew more abt music. ah well. i musn't be distracted now. having already screwed up 1 paper. oh and the guys sitting behind me were most annoying.. every sentence had to be punctuated with f- this n f- tt. unless i was imagining it. anyway i was tempted to throw something at them. like cursing and swearing is so cool. most disgusted. maybe cos the gp video was full of swear words too. watever..

just when i thought i'd gotten over it mom had to come and remind me of everyth all over again.. said she talked to my bro. which is so true. i don't have much to offer n for that i kind of regret. maybe i should just resign myself to my fate haha. moral of story [man i was going to type morale.. too much of dr chan.. haha] make e most out of jc life n don't regret at the end of your 2 years. i've never realised that so acutely until it really matters and it's too late.

weird how a few months before i'd just think i'll have a go at it and hope for the best. and now it seems so impossible. delayed reaction. maybe cos the prelims are so near and i'm so unprepared. and i noe i've said u shouldn't give up b4 trying if not half the battle's lost b4 u even begin & i do believe tt but sometimes it's unbelievably difficult to put it in practice.

it's times like these when i really wish we could just fast forward to nxt yr sept or sth n we'll be happily going off to uni [assuming best scenario]. maybe it's not good to want something too badly cos you'll be doubly disappointed when you fail.

of course i hope i'm worrying unnecessarily. is it possible? to turn a dream into reality.

ugh right speaker isn't working! so weird to have music just coming out from the left side.
feel so sorry for li jia wei. newspapers are full of how she cried aft the match and apologised and blah. and really i don't think we're in much of a position to critique the games in detail just after watching a couple of games. if that makes sense. i don't noe why i was so affected either.. maybe cos i agree w wat the preacher said yesterday abt it's easy to say stuff when u're not playing and not feeling the pressure and all that.

it was gd seeing [tan] jh pam n lyd today tho:) miss them lots. n funnily enough seems like mugging w classmates leads to more bonding somehow. come out with all the interesting questions that u need to rack ur brain to find ans to. or clarifying concepts at least. quite good:) at least company makes mugging less dreary. guess wat ruijie said that day was right. at least if i can't go out w my frens i still can see them ard sch/mug w them. better than nothing.

at least there's friends tonight. shall go eat dinner maybe food therapy helps haha i dun like eating much nowadays. unless its dessert:p

and i just remembered the word is inadequacy. i mean i remembered it some time ago but am only online to check the table tennis finals results.. at least china won. haha. today's bronze match was really the sound of inevitability. okay maybe not the sound. but i just felt tt it was inevitable somehow. oh well. it's over.

haven't blogged for a while. sigh. suddenly i'm reminded of my inadequateness [if there's such a word]. how? can't snap out of it. unhappiness probably compounded by yesterday's semi-finals heh. its funny how i'm so affected by olympics. mom's v puzzled as to why i'm suddenly watching olympics all the time. i guess its kinda like the epitome of perfection in sport. n i appreciate perfection. and my quill show was so sad.. i mean the front was nice n cute n funny but the back parts were tragic: but now i feel like getting a puppy! haha. get it when its a little baby.. so cute:)

okay tt made me feel just a teeny bit better. phys prelim prac on friday. i think i need divine intervention.. every prac i manage to screw up something.. chem qa is a disaster.. phys i always manage to do some calculation carelessly or sth.. bio.. always cannot finish. and i think i'm sinking deeper into this abyss. main papers? haha. my revision is half done. and am forgetting everything.

nvm maybe music'll help. but only for a while. and reality will come crashing back down. rite. talk about self pity haha so pathetic. shall stop it. shall try n get back to work.

haha i think i must be too dazed frm the whole day or sth.. can't believe i looked at serene's earthquake tag and wondered how come there was an earthquake in bishan. [tremors from indonesia?? hahaha. and bishan's in the middle of spore somemore. i'm really insane.] oh dear. well just means i need sleep:p which i'm not gonna get cos i've to go send the 3 m's off tmr at like 7-sth. groan.

ah anyway. yesterday. was actually fun! haha. w junwan n lijia n pingying:) have various quotes stored in my phone. ohhh how bout this..
py doing her s6 on jw's insistence "u didn't tell me u need MF11!"
jw, triumphantly [and v helpfully] "u need MF11!"
and in swensen's when we were having lunch.. [yeah went swensen's again cos i wasn't satisfied din get to eat topless 5 the day b4 haha:p] jw decides we should eat 3 topless 5's to get our money's worth cos the usual topless 5 costs $7. so lijia says "i noe how we can get home! walk!" haha. to burn off all the calories. but anyway it was really fun n hilarious:)

yeah. and today. was not bad i guess. given that the whole time they [3 church frens frm canada] were here i didn't go out with them oops. and the beginning part when they just arrived was quite awkward since i haven't seen them for 2 years. but today was quite okay. yup. i liked reading sherman's lagoon comics at mph haha. lots of mirth:D until jason [church fren frm rj choir! 3 yrs ago or sth.] decided i shud go there more often to destress. haha. and the village was kinda freaky at some parts. eeks. but it isn't that bad lar.. contrary to wat i heard.

oh yes i saw this movie advert at lido with this really really cute n sweet small lil puppy i shall watch the show!:) yay:) it's called quill or sth like that, coming out on 19th august. yippee~

just back. sigh i shudn't have called back so early.. then could have gone to eat icecream with the rest of them:) oh well.. another time. the food was quite good lar but the rest of the circumstances weren't. like. waiting for 1hr+ for food is not really something you expect.. and poor lijia n junwan. cold food and wrong order. hais. until don't feel like watching movie.. nvm hopefully the ice cream will cheer them up:)

anyway. i think the only thing good was extra-ing at lt3 with candice in the morning:) ditched our class gals to go watch them sing. and sang dravidian and tt swedish song [forgot the name liao but its quite a pretty song:] with them! haha. they're all so happy. so nice. kind of wistful. but it was lovely watching anyway:) on a side note, i really have no idea how my beaver got to darryl/jinjie and got sadly abused hmph.

oh pam carrying jh [my class not choir] on the way to holland v was funny:p reminds me of some other photo.. ohhh yes aud carrying a tracker i think. n i still owe chris saltimbanco oops.

haha mugging with jan around is always a hoot. she does such crazy things:p oh and yesterday when jan n jiahui were there it was even funnier.. jan drops her water bottle cap and flings it around and then decides its clean. jiahui "sometimes i wonder if u're a bio student" [sth to tt effect anyway].. since aft learning med biotech we shud noe how hard it is to get rid of bacteria n etc.

yeah. its quite fun i guess. albeit a bit noisy at the start usually. today also. jan's various antics. too bad we can't film everything. n the way she n alvin "quarrel"... and we could hear the j1s singing mayila n rasa sayang frm where we were sitting.. haha rasa sayang reminded me of all the times we sang in italy [esp in ethnic costumes]. bet val sitting in lt5 was laughing at the high "kang kong" parts. sounds like those clocks which have cuckoos inside which pop out and go "cuckoo!" oh and horrible darryl who said i was 2 yrs old *glare* if i'm 2 then u're 1 k

wonder if i should have tried applying to uk. after seeing all the pple who went for the talk at 3.15. oh well. wonder how many pple are applying to both. oh and wat mr chan was nagging at us today was like totally everyth i was telling myself last week. which is good advice. but whether i can follow it is another thing.

ah well friday should be a gd day yay:) 413 lunch! yeah!:) get to eat nice food:):):)

back frm grandma's bday dinner. there was live music! haha. quite funky lar. chinese singers and piano/double bass/sax accompaniment. and really, i think the nasal sound is so kteristic of chinese opera singers. if that makes sense. oh well. kind of reminded me of mayila haha:p

and college day. was so terribly boring. well besides kp being ridiculous haha. and i remember how i don't like waking up early on saturdays haha:p 6 days of sch a week mite not be so wonderful after all even if i get to sing. and i didn't noe sicheng's going stanford! aahh. sigh. can't help but imagine wat will happen nxt yr in march when a lvl results come out and in april [i think] when uni app results come out. but i guess tts still quite some time away shud bother abt prelims 1st groan. i need to stop being so lazy.

don't think i've felt out of sorts like that for a long time. since before italy i think. sorry if i was grumpy today.

wah. i think i just spent almost an hour talking to my bro. i'm v happy i have a bro haha:) well at least i think i have a better idea of uni stuff now. less clueless. though still need to decide quite a lot of things. hais this uni decision thing is so draining. talks and talks and talks. and thinking. abt wat course and wat uni.

and i got to see chernise n darryl n jinjie n kaiping just now! yay:) haha their names are consecutive in alphabets: cd n jk. anyway. miss them lots too. at least i get to mug with choir j2s now and then.. hardly get to talk to j1s. 

law talk was interesting. though i think it sounds a bit dry to me. haha. wat ever sounds interesting anyway.. probably sth tt doesn't need memorising.. which probably doesn't exist. bleah. i think i shud have gone for medicine talk too darn. shall hafta go check out the website sometime..

been sleeping so much lately! or rather staying awake and not doing work. aargh. better make sure i prepare better for phys prac than i did for chem:s quite a disastrous test there. oh! for the 1st time i sort of listened during bio lect yay:D tho it was really really -really- cold. and raphael tells really spastic jokes [e.g. bio remediation is for pple who fail bio cts]. and morbid things like how to kill serene in the most gruesome ways possible. -shudders-

heh i feel like i'm living in a time warp or sth.. i still feel like its the 1st semester and find it so weird when i start hearing about signing up for ssef when it seems like its been just a few weeks or so since i went for/signed up for ssef.. yeah. just keep thinking its like maybe april or so and doesn't feel like the end of yr's coming so soon. maybe i'm like blocking out the dreaded prelims/a's. ugh. the way my mind managed to block out that 7mark qn for maths cts. bah. haha ok i noe i'm nuts for still remembering tt but well.

and i'm trying to write my gp essay and suddenly i realise that my examples are all half-baked. i kinda forget everyth after i read it. like maybe i find it interesting for the moment but if u ask me to use it to substantiate my points in an essay i'm a goner. hmm. not good. i really think i have a problem with details.

sigh well. after feeling guilty for happily wasting my weekend away i think i can start doing my work heh. esp when the new tuts just came in ugh:( and i have a prob with bio lectures too don't listen somehow. [serene its all ur fault :p haha]

haiyah i think bio cts were quite pathetic.. anyway various quotes from the post-mortem..
 
for qn on fermenter which had twigs inside [so bacteria can be immobilised on them]
Raphael : the twigs are to poke anyone who tries to enter the fermenter
 
the page with the biosensor qn
R: which ocean is found on this page?
ans: the specific (pacific) ocean
[i think its funnier if its asked and answered aloud tho. and if you see the paper.]
 
for essay on microorganism spoilage and how to prevent it
ms lee
- " some of you can heat milk at 95oC for 30mins.. can boil soup already.."
- " and you blow steam thru milk, not milk thru steam" [had this vague idea of a nozzle spraying milk through steam and wondering how they collect the milk after sterilising haha]
- " for canning you've to heat and then seal it, not seal before you heat!  if not the factory will explode!" [r: we love exploding factories!]
 
ah maybe i just found them funny cos i was in a crazy mood but well. thanks to raphael for the amusement. and its also funny wat students can do out of desperation/stress:p i.e. maths/phys cts as well i think. can't remember. 
 
n i realised its not so gd sitting in the back row for bio.. no. 1 cannot see wats on the board.. no. 2 its super cold. -furry purple jacket to the rescue!-

haha happy day!:) went to venezia w lijia n joon.. msged chris n got her to come along.. met tinky candice n sheila there who were ponning college day rehearsal [tsk] it was really fun tho like a mini 413 reunion:D yay!
and of cos the ice cream reminded me of italy. sigh.

talking abt uni/scholarship apps = superbly depressing. plus i don't noe wat i wanna do in uni either. very vague. nvm.

haha yesterday was fun too got to meet relatives i haven't seen in 8 years. or possibly more. and another cousin who's a scholar here. she's so cute:p n looks so much happier/prettier. its a wonder what taking off braces/putting on contacts does. haha.

din listen during bio lect at all! ahh. somehow its so easy to slack in the back row. although its super cold. thanks jan for the chocolate haha:p

okay in a crazy mood i ended up walking home from the mrt. instead of taking bus. i figured since i made a wrong decision [to take mrt home frm orchard inst of bus] i shall have to bear the consequences. okay that sounds ridiculous but nvm. and i figured i didn't want to take another bus/wait for the bus/still wud have to walk even after taking e bus. and i thought it wud take the same amount of time but boy was i wrong... overestimated myself/underestimated the distance.

nvm i am now very thankful for a car haha:p started regretting halfway when i realised there was still such a long way to go.. and when i had to walk up that slope.. ugh. haha. anyway.

farewell! it was really good seeing everyone again:) i was like 2nd last to go haha came back too tired to do anything. given tt i slept only 3 hrs the previous night cos i slept in the aftnoon and was writing my numerous notes at night. wanted to sleep as early as possible but i ended up rereading all my notes and the journal..

ahh yes denise's house is really lovely. i was wondering if i'd stepped into the wrong house or sth.. it looked so posh and like sth u'll see in a magazine.. words can't describe it.. and i was wondering where the doorstep is cos i cudn't see any shoes anywhere. haha.

anyway.. got there early.. talked to hk.. then pple started coming.. i realised i don't really noe the j1s v well.. except for a few:) sigh. later on the sharing session.. and the song.. the lyrics were so sad.. and it's such a beautiful song. and when hp started singing his solo part.. reminded me of so many things. oh and kp's piano playing.. 1st time i've seen him play a full song.. really impressive:) go take ur frsm la:p

yeah but really must thank the j1s for such a wonderful farewell:) i don't think we were that nice to our j2s last yr hmm also don't think we were as close to them though.. the trip really did a lot. thanks for the presents and the notes and all:)

watching the video brought back somemore memories.. and hearing the songs.. =big sigh= am glad i stayed for as long as possible anyway. somehow it seems so final once there's farewell. i dunno. hopefully not lar. anyway being me i'll probably crash a lot of pracs n be super extra haha

ah i better go do work finally.. haven't done work since wed this is so terrible:s

ahh. nice day:) nice enough anyway.. had lunch w choir pple.. missed italy plus choir all over again hais. but anyway it was a funny lunch.. jan's new fren is now her chai tow kway.. cos she was saying/doing sth stupid [i forgot wat it was.. anyone care to enlighten me?] so jh me n alvin all decided she wasn't our fren anymore so she sed she still had her chai tow kway.. so alvin was like yeah.. say hello to it and then it goes into ur mouth rite..

various silly things today.. while waiting for jan who was waiting for whui for her biotech bk she was calling whui i think n decided that i shud become her elbow rest.. so i've upgraded from being a pillow to an elbow rest hmm. or downgraded? and tiff being too lazy to go to the toilet to change.. and jan arguing w alvin over where tiff put the stuff she photostated..

and while mugging aft lunch.. jan "how many l's did i write? i can't see!" [she wrote "it'lll" n i took a photo of it with her phone haha:p]
and she was happily twirling my scrunchie with her pen.. likening scrunchies to doughnuts: "doughnut holes must be put there for a reason! its to twirl them!"

yeah well. it was fun:) and jan went to get her fav pencil back frm caroline.. so heard them practising the barber of seville overture.. its such a lovely song.. so unfair we dun get to do it! hmph. nvm. like chernise says must go for concert nxt yr then.

woo~ i love freedom. haha. just can't savour it enough. like yesterday i wasn't doing anything constructive at all [well except for that 2 hrs or so at night which gave me a neckache] ah. and finally i can take my time eating breakfast without worrying about what time i'm gonna start studying. yeah... n i still feel like playing pool.

anyway. haha. let me post hc's bio essay qns here. i'm so thankful our bio dept isn't that creative.

Q1a) "lala and her friends were crossing the road. suddenly, the green man turned red. lala decided to beat the red light. describe what happened all the way from when she saw the red light to when she ran across the road." [u're spposed to write about nervous system, how the signals get transmitted]

Q1b)"what if lala was on drugs which prevent neurotransmitter breakdown? what would happen?" [apparently some pple wrote she'll go on running forever, some wrote she'll go into convulsions]

Q2a) "tom dick and harry are good friends. they all go to a restaurant to eat. tom orders fish and chips. while harry orders a chocolate milkshake. describe how tom's body carries out cellular respiration after a meal of fish and chips."

Q2b) "harry is diabetic. do you think his choice of food is correct? if you are dick, what would you advise him to eat/do?"


am really thankful our qns are normally phrased and stuff.

yeah! last paper today! whee~ happy clar:) chem was okay i guess. really needed the revision last night tho i'd forgotten everyth in 3 days.. quite horrifying.. and i looked at the nmr qn "freak! why're there so many c's and h's! wat crazy cpd is tt?" but luckily i think it was alrite..

hmm.. walked around.. had lunch.. i really really want to see everyone's photos again! talked about italy for a bit:) oh when i read the article on the non-stop flight to new york and the place for passengers to gather i was thinking of our flights there n back.. we'll meet pple at the toilet actually. but sigh.

yeah went heeren n borders. wanted to buy cds but cudn't decide which one to buy so din buy. actually i dun even noe wat i want. quite confusing.

oh yeah spiderman was quite gd actually.. even though i dun really like spiderman. but yeah. little jokes everywhere.. a few cheesy lines though esp for mary jane.. and the theme was a bit cliched even if it may be true. overall not bad. yup.

oh!! on the way back.. this guy behind me was french.. it was like.. suddenly i hear a "t'es ou?" behind me and i turned around. super cool. reminded me of anne-laure's [my french corresp] house and everyth abt immersion. bcos of the slang i guess. yeah. it was nice tho:)

bio was okay for the amount i studied i guess.. at least i sort of knew wat they were asking.. it wasn't as bad as the lecture test anyway. which isn't saying a lot since i barely passed that one but well.

math! ugh!! i can't believe myself.. somehow my mind managed to fool me into thinking that i'd finished qn13.. like i just saw it as part of qn12 n i finished it already or sth.. so i went straight to qn 14 n din realise until time was up and they sed "arrange ur script in order of qn" and i saw "qn 12" then "qn 14" then huh? did i write wrongly? -truth dawns- crap. well. will teach me a lesson i guess.. ugh.. 7m wasted... stupid..

humms. didn't like physics. probably cos i can't do data analysis/am too lazy to think. its quite terrible. i remember looking at the qn and thinking "can i give up?" and then scolding myself for wanting to give up before trying. really. i think i need counselling. and then din learn the gold foil/spectral lines thingy so i was crapping on the spot. started panicking during mcq, can't remember why. ahh. i just hope i do fine.

and bio. feel like giving up too. its crazy.. i mean i noe the general idea but if u ask for details.. i'm a goner.. and bio is all about details if not u don't get marks. everything is "be specific!" and how do you "be specific!" if u've no content in ur brain! ugh. ... sorry to all those pple i whined to, thank you for putting up with me:)

haha i just got back frm mugging w jan chris tiff alvin mz. missed everyone lots esp cos of italy.. then when i was walking to macs i saw ronnie [aka chris' ex and jh's current] outside and cudn't stop laughing cos i remembered all the descriptions they gave to enlighten kp.. "in desperate need of a tan" and such.

surprisingly quite serious actually until after lunch we took a break and were crapping for a while.. and then tiff was whining abt not wanting to study so i told her to look at e giraffe on her animal-printed tissue paper [which chris kindly gave to us] and be happy.. then she realised there was no unicorn on hers [but there were 3 on mine so i offered to donate one to her] and started whining somemore haha. i like the tissue paper:) okay i sound quite demented here. oh yes n i had a surround-sound system cos on my right jan was singing and on my left mz was doing percut/singing.

oh yes i became jan's permanent pillow once again. quote her i'm "comfy". if i get another shoulder ache tmr i noe who to blame:p

and on the bus i fell asleep [reminds me of all the long bus journeys] and then almost missed my stop luckily e person nxt to me was getting off too haha:D if not i'd have to walk a looong way.

haha i was watching the bonus features for cirque yesterday and this is like the quote of the day frm one of the acrobats.. "its the best job in the world.. u get paid to kick ur bro's ass!" cos he n his bro are a pair doing this acrobatic stunt thingy.. he lies with his feet upwards on this special chair and the bro sits on his feet and does somersaults. okay its kinda hard to describe.

its the last week. i hope i finally get that firmly imprinted in my brain cos all my stuff is really half-baked. want to buy cds frm HMV! sigh.

right. i think i fell asleep at 9+ yesterday. wat a pig. therefore i effectively didn't do much work yesterday. hais. oh well.

anw. yesterday. bday lunch w peiying lijia n chris! [afterwards ting came] was fun meeting them again:) felt like sec 3/4 days. oh.. my new preferred mode of buying pple presents is to go shopping with them. haha:D advantage: pple get sth useful/sth they like. disadvantage: no surprise. well well.

and i went to run again heh:p maybe that plus walking around for 3 hrs made me v tired. though tt sounds quite pathetic.

dinner with bao n chris n tinky.. quite interesting.. all the reminiscing and bao's new anecdotes.. really funny:p can't believe mrs prama believed baoyi's explanation abt her dyed hair.. tt was really hilarious.. its amazing how she can crap up stuff on the spot like that. and hmm lou's giving stace math tuition tt's new..

mugging is so tiresome and boring. how i'm going to last until november is a mystery to me.

haha yesterday i had mushroom soup and was thinking of room 234. hais. and i was watching cirque du soleil! so lovely:) though actually i got a bit bored later on. but overall i think their shows let u bring something away from it. i haven't figured out wat. but anyway i think the reason why i like them so much is cos their performances are really seamless. like all the difficult stunts and all.. they make it seem so easy. and everything is really in unison. i bet their director is perfectionistic too haha. oh and i love their soundtracks!

hmm. i've never been that angry before in my life i think. at least i don't remember feeling that furious. like just sat there and could feel my temperature rising. very interesting. though on retrospect i wonder why i was that mad. hmm. maybe just keyed up or sth.

the good thing which came out of is that i got so frustrated [not just with one person/event but everyth on the whole cos the aircon pple came n my mom was arguing with them n making a whole freaking lot of noise] that i went to the gym:) haha. and ran. and ran. and ran. so i guess tt cleared my mind too. and gave me exercise. [which i rarely do]

am now slowly cooling off heh decided the fan makes me too cold! shall go bathe. and cool off somemore. have gotten a scolding for not doing much work the whole day.. sigh i never feel like waking up in the morning

hmm. just back frm class dinner. it was gd seeing everyone again.. pity lijia n pam weren't there tho:( and like the one of the 1st few times ser was actually around.. haha.. silhouette photos are fun! peiying n chris quick send me:)

oh and watched harry potter! the overall tone is quite dark. really wonder wat the show's going to be like by the 4th/5th books hmm. anyway.. i didn't really imagine dementors to be flying all over the place.. i thot they just glided on the floor. and the sucking thingy was overdramatic imo. found the image representing the soul interesting.

let me see wat else i din like.. oh lupin looks quite ugly. and the werewolf too. i thot werewolves look like real wolves hmm. this one looked like an overgrown gollum. k i shall stop complaining.. the show was quite okay.. maybe 3 or 3.5 stars yah ser:) oh yeah the patronus also din look like wat i thought. but anyway i guess i've learnt to take a step back frm my own imagination n appreciate wat the movie has. after LOTR. haha.

ah my aircon's finally working:) yay! kinda miss sleeping in my own room.. though surprisingly bro's room isn't that musty. okay i guess i haven't got that much to say so off i go

hmm. i think i'm romesick too. and was addicted to photos last night b4 sleeping. and today i was trying to get some stuff done but didn't succeed particularly well. :( at least tmr i get to see my sec 4 class:) plus one/two tchers:) and watch harry potter:) yay!

oh and i was watching e video my mom/dad took frm concert [though like half of it is kinda messy n cannot see faces] but can hear.. hais. i should really realise there's no more time left.

n i just koped this frm shenting's blog in a moment of boredom.. hilarious.. have a gd laugh.. haha.. its like everything i'm not..

C	Charismatic
L	Legendary
A	Adventurous
R	Refined
I	Irresistible
S	Stunning
S	Spunky
A	Awesome

Name / Username:

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hmm.. went for the church singing thingy today.. was a far cry from chorale.. like duh rite but well.. i guess i'm conditioned to serious practices and high expectations from mr toh's drilling.. which i really am grateful for:)

anyway. i got my photos! woohoo~! yay yay yay:) was at the fujifilm shop and checking for anyth wrong cos of my screwy cam.. was so scared half the photos wouldn't turn out but but they all turned out fine! yay!!!:):):) yeah.. anyway so i was looking thru and laughing to myself.. the woman must have thought i'd gone mad.. o well:) lovely memories:) kinda regret not having taken more photos.. but got quite sick of it after a while.

the only problem was that the last few photos looked like they were taken by a contractor or someone who'd found sth wrong with their house toilet cos those photos were of room 234's crazy toilet:p [which jiahui tiff chris jan had to put up with.. any mushrooms growing yet? i'm sure spore's hot n humid climate is more conducive for mushroom growth rofl]

haha.. was just looking at all the photos pple uploaded.. feel happier somehow:) oh kudos to jan the gown looks really good:) but hope my photos turn out man.. stupid screwy camera:( and then i was looking at the photos chernise took for concert programme.. feels so weird to see choir pple in sch u after seeing them in long sleeves/jackets for the past week.

okay i kind of revived after sleeping a bit in the car on the way home. i have become v good at sleeping on moving vehicles [excluding planes] after going to italy. on boring bus journeys just end up sleeping. [and that happens quite a bit]

rather sad about everything. like. haha. coming home is supposed to be a happy thing n we ended up coming home crying. hais. that journal is really heartrending. esp when reading all the memories. n personal notes. so on the flight frm hongkong to spore when i read the book i started crying. n finally realised how everything is over. guess it didn't really seem that real until the last flight. and even though i kept telling myself that life is kind of full of meetings n partings n still has to go on it didn't work v well. just was wallowing in misery i guess.

just feels so weird to not have choir pple around anymore. that week didn't seem like a week at all.. more like a month. i don't know why though. maybe bcos each day was so packed full of stuff:) the 1st 4 days full of late night concerts when we were all falling asleep [but luckily not for the last night!] and the rome extension days when we took horrible public transport n the late nights in room 234:)

wish we had this trip in the early part of the year.. i think it did a whole lot for bonding that nothing else could have done.. so then i was thinking oh next time when we're having break outside lt4 it'll be more fun.. and then i realised.. those days are over. i've just grown so used to lt4 and choir it seems so weird that it's all over. i guess at least now's holidays.. so it won't be much of a difference.. but when sch reopens.

yeah. and i got to noe kaiping n darryl my dearest buddy whom i'm "super bad" to haha. n jinjie with his primary-coloured caterpillar with 2 heads:p they really provided a lot of amusement in rome:) spent a lot of time w tiff chris jan candice jiahui ben.. v amusing time:)

really hope my photos turn out fine. and we must make sure we bring photos to j2 farewell to order frm each other.. i'm quite sure there're quite a few photos tt i din bother taking with my lousy camera..

okay this is like a really mopey entry but can't help it. there's this sense of inevitability.. everything's over. and all we [j2s] have left is to mug the rest of the year.

oh i wanted to add something. which i suddenly forgot. bah. nvm. another time will do. oh i think our food is infinitely nicer than italian haha. everything is pasta/pizza. or maybe cos of wat we chose but o well. ohh! i remember now. it was like a retreat.. no internet n hardly any smsing.. okay. i shall finally bathe n sleep.