okay since serene complained... haha. actually i guess i was meaning to blog about my job stuff and so on but the whirlwind of spring quarter senior year + commencement caught me and swept me up.
so, quick summary of job stuff: God has provided most abundantly even though his timeline was clearly quite different from mine. haha. all those consulting interviews in fall quarter.. i guess they built up my confidence. getting final rounds. even though there were multiple let-downs and disappointments when i didn't get offers. and i also learnt (thanks to serene's honesty, i appreciate that) how much of a monster i can become when it comes to being competitive... quite shocking, really.
winter quarter, i was kind of tired of interviewing and submitted a few resumes for the sake of it, heart really wasn't in it. lazy. unmotivated.
spring quarter, i realized just how little time i have left, and things like air tickets etc have to be settled. fasted that one meal which was quite a big deal since i was eating literally all the time during that period. was quite bad, really. so i tried my hardest, contacted alumni to help. got a couple more interviews, two rejections and this one i was a little iffy about, given the odd location (the shopping complex where college students do their grocery shopping! i didn't even know there was an office building) and also the fact that they called me in directly for final rounds (i.e. a full day of interviews) without any preliminary phone interview. also, lousy website means i couldn't find out much about the company.
went there, met the people. liked the good-natured joking i saw between people, kind of reminded me of last summer (bluepulse). the last guy i met was the CEO. i thought it was ok but it seemed like he wasn't so interested at the end and i had this sinking feeling in my heart. decided it was time for retail shopping. while driving to macy's, told God i was so tired of interviewing and trying to tell people how good i am etc. why is a job so hard to get?! and then 1 hour later, the CEO calls me and tells me i have an offer... cannot believe it man. later i thought about it and was wondering how much i get paid... gotta wait till i get back to find out. get back, find out that it is a really good offer! and at that point i was already ready to settle for anything. plus i get to start whenever..
that's a pretty short summary as it is. but i have been greatly blessed.
sigh
i wonder what, if anything, i ought to be doing about this. for the (however many)th time this quarter, i wake up to my roommate telling her boyfriend what's wrong with him. ok normally she does that at night, but i'm just kind of amazed at how he manages to put up with constantly being told how he's lacking! <-- this was at 9:20am+ after i got woken up. i REALLY wanted to whine about how i've had enough of this and what not, but... (continue below)
at 9:40am my roommate comes out so i decided to ask her if everything's okay... and we talked a little about how her boyfriend annoys her a LOT sometimes. and how she gives and gives but doesn't receive any appreciation. actually i can't really remember what i told her anymore, but it included things like not expecting in return for giving (and then when you are appreciated that's even better!), that she shouldn't expect him to change (this, thanks to ser's wisdom after almost a year of marriage;p), that maybe she needs to ask God to change her, and she said she's always been really competitive and feels like she has to mould everything. i also said something about trying to remember that everyone's a reflection of God and when friends make us happy, He makes us happy too. anyway, after talking to her i feel more sympathetic about the whole situation, more peace i guess.
frantic econ outline writing. ok, not that frantic since i wasn't THAT clear-minded at the moment. but i forgot about it. oh, and then i printed out jackie's creative writing stuff (SO many pages! i did not realize... haha). i wonder how she managed to write so many pages in a week. anyway, i don't usually like poems that much but hers are beautiful. and short stories! very cool. love the language. love good writing.
so i go and turn in my econ outline thing and i saw other pple's stuff and they were so much more detailed and seemed much more advanced in where they were! i guess i did pretty much change my research question last night, but i don't know if my TA'll be nicer cos of that. eeps. i can only trust. and pray for grace. mrarrrr.
anyhow so i went to the post office, got my EAD card (i look like a BALL in the picture, i am not kidding). i'm like whatever, as long as it serves its purpose, i'm never looking at it again. :p
and my roommate comes back from lunch and says she loves talking to me. given my sleep-deprived state, i immediately forget what she said to me (or i guess i was somewhat dazed so it came in one ear and happily wafted out the other), but it was along the lines of how the things i say are true/wise, and that i make her a better person. i was like awww! -melt- that was really unexpected and quite touching. from what she said it sounds like she spent most of her time in the library thinking about what we talked about instead of reading. but it's kind of cool, i hope it did help...
anyway ok, now it's time to pick a passage for bible study. it's really funny, last night i was thinking about it and i was like hm i think i should ask people to think about things that surprised them this week/where God might have been working and then this happens to me today...
some amazing praise notes i had to throw out:
1. extension of deadline for my econ paper outline! i was getting stressed out about it last night, realized i had two interviews to prep for plus a concert tmr night etc... and i had no data set at that point (still working on it). today i went to class and the prof says to us, "i don't know if this will help, but i can give you a tiny extension..." and at this point i'm staring at her with huge eyes like she's just given me a great treasure. anyhow i feel like a huge load has been lifted off (but also i guess less stress means i will procrastinate on it a while more :|) and i can concentrate on interview prep and all that.
2. i feel like God has given me favour with people.
a. i emailed a prof about the data set thing last wed and she replied thurs morning; emailed her last night and she replied this morning (i was frankly VERY amazed), and then i find out from another classmate that she also emailed this same last fri but hasn't received a reply. i'm like wow. maybe my data question is easier to answer, but still..
b. i emailed an alum to help with my job thing (which led to my wed interview, more praise!) and today as i was talking to another friend, i realized she emailed the same alum but didn't get her resume internally referred. perhaps my email was more explicit/sounded more desperate, but also wow...
3. strange coincidence. i guess i was thinking about the EAD card (which allows me to stay and work here after graduation) since i have an interview tmr, but i suddenly decided to check on the status (i guess i'd thought about checking before but figured it was too early for anything to have happened) and so i went to fish out the letter they sent me with the tracking number. and guess what?
"Current Status: Card Mailed
On April 27, 2009, we mailed the new card directly to the address we have on file."
again, i'm just astonished. like, what are the odds...
anyhow, just feel like God's been speaking to me through these little things and He is good. i also thought about the possibilities that neither interview works out and i'm back to square one, but I will trust in His grace and His plans for me.
Mosaic!
This is on facebook but for me to remember... so pretty! and so funny that the last row = all animals.
Rules:
a. Type your answer to each of the questions below into Flickr Search (http://www.flickr.com/).
b. Using ONLY the first page, pick an image.
c. Copy and paste each of the URLs for the images into Mosaic Maker. Change rows to 3 and columns to 3 (http://bighugelabs.com/flickr/mosaic.php).
d. Save the image and post it on this note!
e. If you're tagged, pass it on to however many people you want. And tag me. :)
The Questions:
1. What is your first name? (Clarissa)
2. What is your favorite food? (Sushi rolls)
3. What is your favorite color? (Pink)
4. Favorite drink? (Mango shake)
5. Dream vacation? (Corfu, Greece)
6. Favorite hobby? (Snowboarding)
7. What do you want to be when you grow up? (Dolphin trainer)
8. What do you love most in life? (Beauty)
9. One word to describe you? (Calm)
1. Clarissa and Chi Chi 8, 2. temari sushi, 3. Water sculpture, 4. refreshingly good!, 5. Krf, Grcka (Corfu, Greece), 6. Wall #1, 7. Hawaii #16 - Baby wolphin, 8. My Girls..., 9. Savoir Vivre... hmmmmmm
fleeting days
i'm counting down the weeks. and i don't know if this is like a self-fulfilling prophecy, but after lindsey's email i'm like yes, i am stressed. she said that "this is a really emotional and stressful season, even if it doesn't feel like it", and i guess i've come to believe it even though i don't think i was that stressed before.. or maybe the overeating/constant snacking was a symptom or whatever you call it.
anyway, after today, i'm just like i'm so tired, why the heck did i not plan my classes properly so i wouldn't have to take so many freaking classes in my last quarter. and even then i don't know if it would make a difference... although i'm tempted to drop either accounting or the research thing. but i feel like i can't drop research since i talked to her and all that, and it is, sort of, a full-time option even though i haven't talked to her about that recently. psych paper due today, i don't think it was fantastic so praying for favour with graders, i have to write another 2 page thing for econ due tmr and i'm tired... there's a career fair tmr and thurs, oh look, here's the job thing coming up
counting down the weeks, because with 7 weeks left, i can't even figure out whether i should be enjoying myself or trying to find a job. because those two are, i think, quite contradictory and both take time. one of them has to come first and i don't know which one. if i don't end up getting a job here and i spent most of my last quarter here trying to do that, that would really suck.. as opposed to if i knew i was going to go home and making the best of my last weeks here. and i still have those 18 units worth of class... but again, i guess if i stay i'll have weekends to play. but now, trying hard doesn't equal GETTING a job. sigh.
i guess it's still possible to take a break after graduating like daryl/junwan did. but.. dunno. my mom seems to assume that i'm going home too, she asked me whether i was going to start shipping stuff back. AUGH. i hate life decisions. ok, this is sounding so angsty.. probably doesn't help that it's so windy and cold:(
and it's not that i don't believe God will provide. because ultimately, He will. and i just looked at the resurrection passage. because He rose again, we have hope! the only problem being i don't feel very hopeful at the moment and i'm just tired. but oh, i just found this. 1 John 5:14 Now this is the confidence that we have in Him, that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us. just for me... haha.
update: yay for friends, had dinner w annie & yeye (my little from akpsi) and i feel better! even though, the problem is still there, i feel better about life. talk about moodswings... man.
crappy
my roommate was arguing with her boyfriend again (on the phone) and i could hear her raised voice and it just made me feel so uncomfortable. uncomfortable isn't even the correct word.. antsy? i have no idea. i am extremely extremely conflict-averse. as are most people, i guess. i don't know. and the whole raised voice thing happens so regularly (well, frequently enough) that i'm just like are relationships supposed to be like that?? i thought you're supposed to be happy most of the time..
and then i check my zipcar account and realize that i got charged $50 for returning the car late. i really should've made sure we left on time to get the car returned on time... i feel bad making the student group pay for it, but i don't want to pay for it either. sigh. this is what comes of not being insistent enough.
not so crappy anymore, just puzzled
okay, talked to my roommate about her bf issues. i am unbelievably ill-equipped to give relationship advice, i wonder why i've been finding myself in such situations. i never wanted to go through the whole heartbreak thing, but it almost makes me feel as though i would be better able to relate to people when they tell me about it. like my roommate was like "it's hard to let go, i took 1.5 years to actually break up with my last bf" and i'm like okay... given that i've never found myself in that situation i don't quite know what to say.
but even then, actually, i think i'll just be thankful that God has kept my heart whole since that's what i always wanted anyway. or at least, i THINK it's whole.
now, how to add empathy to the picture... hm.
oh man, i just realized that another friend i'm meeting on wed sort of has issues of the heart too. why can't our world be perfect... i guess that's what heaven is. rawr. light please?
a Somebody with a nobody
so I'm subscribed to this weekly study on the names of God (mostly old testament, i think) and i really liked the bold part:
God tells Moses that he has seen the misery of "my people" and states his intention to rescue (nāstal) them and bring them back to Canaan. He concludes, "So now, go. I am sending you to Pharaoh to bring my people the Israelites out of Egypt" (3:10). Now Moses begins to protest. His first objection is that he is a nobody. God's answer to the excuse of being a nobody, is that a Somebody will be with him.
"But Moses said to God, 'Who am I, that I should go to Pharaoh and bring the Israelites out of Egypt?'
And God said, 'I will be with you. And this will be the sign to you that it is I who have sent you: When you have brought the people out of Egypt, you will worship God on this mountain.'" (3:11-12)
afresh
alright, i sat and thought about it and i have resolved to be a better student for my last quarter. and i will also apologize to my mom for being so bratty. God's grace is enough even though I'm so wretched sometimes.
sigh
the one time in a long while my mom decides to call, and she calls to tell me that i need a wake-up call to stop slacking and work harder in my last quarter. cos i told her i just came back from playing cards at joseph's. i guess she's right that that isn't the best use of time, and also it IS true that my undergrad gpa has been dropping since fall quarter and my econ is quite terrible, i think i got Bs for my last two econ classes. i wonder where my work ethic has gone... and it's no good being flippant about it, i really did use to work harder.
anyhow, i guess at that point i was just focused on how pathetic/disappointing it was that the one time my mom decides to call, it's to express disapproval. and then i felt bad that i was giving monosyllabic answers. but it's 2am and i'm tired from the day, plus you've just finished reproaching me, how do you expect me to be able to chat with you cheerfully when you've just made me feel crappy about myself? and now that just sounds so self-centered..
unfortunately, negative things do have to be said by someone else i'd never know. poor mom. has to bear the consequences of scolding me for my own good. a bit like how Jesus had to die for our sins huh.
the beginning of the end
that is totally koped from yx's gchat status, but it is true. i don't know why people always say "you must be glad to be graduating right?" nothing could be further from the truth! ok granted assignments & midterms & finals aren't exactly fun, but really... being able to arrange classes so i don't have class on fridays (if i don't take social dance 2) is quite cool. haha.
it was quite a packed day, involved quite a lot of food after dinner (bad!!!) but i have BAKKWA! i have never been so excited. ok i probably have, but you know... oh wow and i just realized jackie's going to feed me too. MACARON!!! and i forget what the other thing is. i guess it's a good thing i went with dayoung to yoga-pilates and abs&glutes today. yoga-pilates was still ok, surprisingly, cos the last time i went i remember feeling very inept at all the stretching and crunches and what not. so, hopefully i am more fit now! haha. or maybe the aches from snowboarding eclipsed everything else so it didn't matter.
abs & glutes... gosh. oh, i met tomi & christina & jessica (my frosh dormmates!) which was cool, and then we all suffered together. the instructor was seriously crazy, 67 years old and still so lithe and wiry and FIT. as christina was saying "i'm 22 years old and i can't do half the things he's doing!" anyway... after that dayoung & i couldn't walk properly, climbing the stairs is painful, i thought my thighs were going to start spasming with all the squats and other things he made us do. gosh. but if we do go for the rest of the quarter i'm sure we'll be very toned by the end... haha.
alright. i am going to go to social dance tmr... oh i still have to figure out what camera to buy. and i really hope i didn't bring any bed bugs back from puerto rico...
contradictions
my church sends out the electronic version of the weekly bulletin so i got this thing called the christian's checklist. anyhow, i got to this one where it gave the verse 1 Cor 3:18 Let no one deceive himself. If anyone among you seems to be wise in this world, let him become a fool that he may become wise.
and then it reminded me of other verses with "the first shall be last" and "my power is made perfect in your weakness". and it just occurred to me that i love those contradictions somehow, because they are so unintuitive.
the faces of music
just watched my friends perform their guzheng/pipa, it was pretty amazing... i felt like i was in china in some palace courtyard or something, like royalty being entertained by court musicians. or in some chinese movie... quite surreal.
and then i realized how similar the guzheng is to the harp. sound-wise and the way you play it, kind of. the glissandos are pretty alike! and knocking on the wood part for extra sound effect. v cool! and then saw a bunch of other chinese instruments i hadn't really heard before... so interesting! music can be produced in so many different ways.
alright, back to my 3000word final.
exciting!
i was able to pray for my roommate who's been having bf issues... i don't even know why i feel excited about it and i feel like i've to tell someone. still debating on whether i should email people. or whether that's like boasting or something.
anyway, she asked me how i never get angry, cos she flares up pretty easily and throws tantrums (her own words, not mine). and esp so when her bf doesn't react in ways she expects and then she's disappointed (or rather, angry). i think to begin with, we just have different temperaments, i'm just more zen or something. but.. yeah, i was asking her about her relationship and stuff and it just felt so much like she had so much on her plate to handle and was so stressed. so i was just sharing that knowing that God's spirit works in us is so freeing because it takes away the pressure of me thinking i've to achieve everything on my own. just being able to trust is good. and i asked her if she prays.. (she's catholic so it's a little different) and then i prayed for her.
anyhow, although i'm not quite sure i had an answer to the anger thing (or maybe the solution was prayer), but she said she felt much better after praying so that was really cool. i guess i felt so glad that i was able to serve her and serve God at the same time :) which makes me think, it kind of is a testimony huh? but i wonder if my wanting to tell someone is craving man's praise... hm. the tale of the pharisee and the tax collector comes to mind.
end quarter blues
last night, at the last bible study for the graduating chi alpha people, my christian fellowship pastor glen was praying for us and a phrase just stuck in my mind - "as they take their last classes at stanford next quarter". i mean, there was definitely more to the whole prayer but since this is something i've been thinking about for a while, that's the phrase that stuck. it is so surreal. i've probably repeated this at least three times this year but i still can't get over how fast 4 years have flown by! i guess i did realize every year when i came back and had to adjust to being a "sophomore", then a "junior", and now a senior... it's kind of like getting older. somewhere in jc i kept thinking i was 16 and always had to count to figure out my age (happens sometimes now too) and i also cannot believe i'm turning 23 this year, it's scary [sorry to people who've had birthdays already :p]
and my pastor also told us that we'd be having a senior farewell sort of thing at the last chi alpha next quarter and that we should think about what we'd say (share) with the younger 'uns. haha. the irony is that i think i did spend time hanging out more in my sophomore/some of junior year, but not so much this year, unfortunately.. even so, my spiritual growth here has far surpassed that at home thanks to all the people i've come in contact with. and i guess the most important lesson is still the one from freshman year, when sean told me that if i just carve out that time for God, things will rearrange themselves in the remaining time. the way i see sunday morning as taken, that can be so for other things too (like chi alpha). actually that can still be applied to many other things.. but oh well.
i have no idea why i'm feeling so odd today. i think i need to sleep. hopefully that's it. and eat more oranges and less fried/sweet things. i am honestly so terrible at discipline when it comes to food. i blame america for this. and the dorm buffet dining system. haha.
in need
i really haven't the foggiest idea why i've been so tired this week. i slept 9 hours on sunday night and yesterday night. i guess monday i was okay.. today i was tired in the afternoon. maybe it's the dsch project draining me... i've seen my team practically every day and we struggle with the same questions and it's just so tiring to keep diverging and converging and getting feedback which changes stuff and we go back to square 1 and repeat the process. i don't think i can be a designer, it just takes too much out of me. or maybe i'm just saying that cos i'm tired now.
and i guess i was also somewhat annoyed because i thought we were okay with the project and i could go to tahoe. although now, given that i'm doing that microsoft visit thing tmr it's probably not very possible since i'd have to somehow finish my 500 word essay (which is very unformed) in like 1.5 hrs before going to chris tomlin and all. sighhhh.
alright, i think i just need to sleep and all will be better tmr! although i do have a packed day, as usual. i haven't not had a packed day since... i dunno when. oh wait, sunday. i don't know why it's felt like it's been so long... hm. clearly, there is something wrong. ah well. bedtime!
friday night!
so i watched confessions of a shopaholic with selene, which was fun!!! haha. there were so many *gasp* moments though. i felt like i was making so much noise. anyhow... on reflection it really is a little like 27 dresses. girl is in denial about (insert flaw), meets guy, falls in love, guy finds out about said flaw (and oh no, trust is broken, -dramatic drumroll-), they break up, girl steels self to address said flaw, they meet again as guy finds out that girl has changed for the better and happy ending! yippee... haha ok that sounds so cynical in a way. but it is somewhat formulaic... the green scarf thing was kinda sweet though.
oh, on another note with being cynical. today we had a guest speaker from IDEO for our organizational behavior class, and half the products she talked about i had already heard about from my dschool class where one of the IDEO founders is on the teaching team! and i was just sitting there being okay... been there, heard that. it's quite amazing how much they've achieved though, relatively small company and so much coverage! i guess they do have a tie to Stanford with the dschool so that helps. but the guest speaker (who incidentally was the marketing head) was right, you can't do a graduate course at Stanford without hearing about/watching the shopping cart video. haha. but again... lyd said she watched it at SMU so i guess it's not just masters!
and last note. i really never thought about the abraham-sacrificing-isaac story very much, but since i've come here (i don't know when was the first time i really thought about it thanks to chi alpha prodding or something or other), it seems to have come up so much! especially recently, i guess. since i'm reading it in hebrew for biblical hebrew class, and then today at clare's bible study thing it was the passage... it is good though. to think about idolizing things/people/ideas and having an almost warped sort of love (to do with the whole idolizing thing again). or obsessive. i don't know. but it is so easy to fall into.. for me anyhow. okies, bedtime!!! what a crazy day.
the return...
of the work monster!
so i thought i was being on task by finishing my 261 pset early (for once. maybe twice.) and then today after dschool stuff i realize i have TONS of stuff to do. it's amazing how much time dsch stuff takes, i must rethink whether i want to apply to do another dsch class next quarter, it being my last quarter. man, that sounds so sad to say. but i have determined to fill it with fun stuff! well ok i have to find people who want to do fun stuff too but hopefully that won't be a huge problem.. although one of those things does include doing pearline's otter kayaking thing.. hm.
and tonight's chi alpha was quite powerful. including the fact that the guest speaker (dick schroeder) repeated something that i remembered so clearly from highway during the summer. that we must learn to accept and let go with open palms, instead of clenching to hold on and not being able to let go. and that relates to selfishness. it's funny though, i always thought i wasn't selfish until i realized all the little things which demonstrate how incredibly self-centered i am sometimes. i learnt to care for other people by seeing how jackie cared for her friends (her boys, as she calls them), to genuinely care about how other pple's days went instead of just asking it for the sake of courtesy. chi alpha helped with that too, i saw that with esther & company as well.
anyway... he gave us this sheet of paper contrasting selflessness (the embodiment of God) and selfishness and how one spirals outwards like the sun radiating its light outwards and leads to heaven, while the other spirals inwards like a black hole and leads to hell. very thought-provoking. anyway, i decided i needed to stick it up on my wall to remind me to not be so self-centered. and just now i could share in my roommate's joy of rearranging her room (silly as it sounds) and it felt good! better than just being like oh, cool, good for you.. it was fun to really care about what makes her happy too. :)
alright. now i have to go back to finishing 22 pages of reading for a case. ahhhh. pooft.
the power of a song
so i just felt like listening to a certain chinese pop song which i hadn't listened to in a while (寻友启示 - 明道/许孟哲) and it was a song that i had on replay a lot during summer. it brought back so many memories of walking down the streets of downtown san mateo to and from work, running/wandering along sandhill road and being at jackie's apartment. oh, and my first attempts at cooking, that was definitely interesting. it's amazing how much a song can bring to mind.
i guess i tend to replay songs over and over during a certain period of time and then it gets associated with whatever happens during that time.
update: feb 22 sunday. ah. 1000 years by kang eun soo (from the movie innocent steps) reminds me of freshman year cos i got hooked on the movie when i was on the way home - it's this korean dance show about this girl from china who gets "imported" to korea to learn to dance and falls in love with her teacher. but anyhow, i watched that show at least 4 times on the way back from SFO to SIN and so that song is forever associated with my first trip back home and that winter break. it's actually quite amazing how i can get so obsessed with things sometimes. rather unhealthy. what happened to moderation?! that's probably why i get these eating frenzies.. just like a shark.
metallica
so now i'm somewhat confused as to whether they're heavy metal or rock, but whichever it is, i don't really like it very much. but after watching almost 2 hours worth of the documentary (which i have to analyze for my organizational behavior class midterm), i think i actually appreciate the music somewhat (horror of horrors). i mean, they are pretty skillful, despite the fact that it is SO loud and they're always cursing. electric guitars are kinda cool. i think i still have about 20mins more to watch... the power of familiarity. it's kind of the same for highway (my current church) too, i didn't use to like the music very much but now i think i've kinda gotten used to it. although i still miss campbell's acappella sometimes.
anyhow, it was really quite amusing when i (very surprisingly) recognized one of metallica's songs while watching the video. like what are the odds right, since i really don't like that sort of music. (jackie: quick listen to smooth jazz to soothe your frazzled soul!) and then i decided to google the rock band songs (since that's the first thing that the video reminded me of) and i realized it's enter sandman i.e. dewen's & pearline's fav song to play on rock band... haha. it is really a challenge to watch 2+hrs worth of music i don't really like though, i must say.
it also doesn't help that this video is kinda about how dysfunctional the group is, so there's lots of conflict and such. being a very peace-leaving person, it makes me feel so uncomfortable. i guess i would do a lot to avoid conflict if i can.. anyhow. yes, so the combination of not-my-fav-music + dysfunctional group dynamics = bad.
which suddenly reminded me of how i think recruiting is so bad for the soul. i guess anything competitive is, really, in a sense. my roommate was saying that she's not used to failure, and after putting in so much effort into preparing for interviews and not being able to do well in them, it feels crappy. and it does, i've been through it twice. after you're past it it doesn't really matter anymore, but while you're still in that place, it feels terrible. and somewhat determinant of self-worth, which is a really bad idea but happens anyway... maybe that's called character-building, haha.
this weekend i'll be freeeee! as a bird! i feel like i ought to go do something exciting but don't know what that is. maybe i should go go-karting with akpsi... hm. but i don't really feel like it either. and next week's freeee too! but i've to figure out my job. ugh. i really hope i have an offer by the time i graduate so i can go home for summer and see everyone... pray hard.
random bible study note
so i'm doing this study called 'how God called his servants' which my pastor gave us.. and i was reading the front part of Ezekiel and somehow it just struck me as to what weird creatures people saw in their visions.
Ezekiel1:10 Their faces looked like this: Each of the four had the face of a man, and on the right side each had the face of a lion, and on the left the face of an ox; each also had the face of an eagle.
like, seriously? creatures with 4 sided faces? that sounds kinda far-fetched man. those old testament prophets definitely saw some weird things. but anyhow. guess it goes to show how we've been so socialized to what's normal. it's like in sophie's world (jostein gaarder) where they give the example of how kids come into the world without much idea of what's supposed to be normal.. e.g. if they looked up and suddenly saw mom flying around the room, they wouldn't be very surprised but dad would probably freak out. cos dad has been in the world long enough to know that people mostly stay on the ground... kinda interesting. oh philosophy.