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wow it's almost been a week since i last posted! but this quarter is so crazy. actually every quarter's crazy. hmm. yeah. plus double ski trips.. which means my weekend is effectively gone.. oh well. boarding is always fun, except for the long drive there >.< and this time i somehow wrenched my left leg or something, it really felt dislocated yesterday.

so here's the story (which is going to sound so stupid but well):
so after getting off the lift for the beginner slope (of all slopes! ugh! was going to help out my dormmates cos it was their first time boarding) i think i skidded on an icy patch and then landed on my side. in which i felt this sharp pain on my left side (similar to wat happened to my finger last week at heavenly as well - talk about jinxed). and i wasn't going to get up for a bit but i was blocking the path and this guy helped me up.. anyway it was so so painful (still is actually) but i could still board (although it was still kinda painful) so i'm like heck i'll just continue

so when i unstrapped and had to walk my board along it did hurt, kind of, but when i was actually boarding it wasn't so bad.. thankfully. but when i stopped for lunch. !! that was a nightmare. really could NOT walk at all.. i kept wondering whether i fractured something. and it was so torturous i was thinking about calling Peling (my long-suffering RA) to come pick me up earlier. but then i thought about the $50 lift ticket and the 5hour drive and i'm like heck.. i'll just go on.

it was fun though, going on the nevada side properly (instead of getting myself stuck there like last Sat and having to rush down the slopes to get down in time). the snow was much better. and i did blues! yayy. but yeah, after that i was begging Reid (my other long-suffering RA) to let me take the car up the hill cos there was no way i was going to be able to walk up. and he actually offered to carry me cos Peling was going to be driving the equipment up.

oh what happened was that our house was on this hilly part where the bus couldn't enter cos it wouldn't be able to climb the hill.. so we'd to walk about 0.3miles in (according to Peling) - on the first night it definitely seemed REALLY long esp cos 1. it's uphill and 2. it was so cold. but yeah, Peling made a second trip down to the bottom to get me so phewwww. walking from the ski lodge to the bus was already so painful as it was.. everyone was really nice about it though.

and i totally suck at CS.. okay well i guess this is really my fault (as usual). didn't start doing my assignment earlier.. and then i fell asleep on thurs night cos i was so tired from getting up at 6:30 to go to SF for my interview and then company talks at night.. so no time to code. and had to take two late days (we get three 'free' late days for the quarter) cos i couldn't hand in by fri at 5 cos we left at 3 to go to tahoe.. and over the weekend i didn't do coding either (i need a freaking laptop man) , did a little on the bus but coding without testing it out never works.. so i just handed in a buggy program. which really sucks cos i hate doing things like that. :(

i hope my leg is fine by tonight. okay, more realistically, by tomorrow.

sigh i don't know why i'm in such a bad mood nowadays. okay maybe not nowadays.. aiyah. i hope it's just a passing thing! i keep thinking about how glen said if your religion hasn't made you a better/nicer person, nothing can.

anyway. so while i was typing this halfway cs n jon came in and 1. started marvelling at the (rather horrible) state of my room and i was telling them stories of how 1. i got 'stuck' on the nevada side of heavenly ski resort this weekend and 2. seihout (one of my snowboarding buddies now) went down a black diamond and called 911. haha. now that is a really succinct summary which sounds hilarious but the details are really ... wow.

but i feel better now. wangning's bday dinner was hilarious.. daryl and bertram are such a pair! well of cos daryl's much sillier but still.. they are so ridiculous.. at least i can still laugh with them. and of cos with jackie, wat would i do without that girl esp at night when we're both tired and not making much sense.. haha. oh yes. tonight i'm going to wear the antlers and amuse her (and myself). jon was trying to persuade me to bring it to the dinner but i'm like no! in the privacy of my own room, fine.. at dinner, no!!!! oh the antlers are this hairband thing which came with a burger king happy meal (which i had before leaving)

alright i shall try to cleaan up my room and i'm quite sure i have lots of things to do.. including the last part of settling $ stuff for the snow trip which was such a nightmare:|

sometimes i just want to quit school. and do what, i don't know. it's been such a long day, i am so tired, and it isn't over yet. actually i guess i could sleep. oh no i have to write that thank you letter first. okay actually my spirits just lifted a little cos Still by Hillsongs was playing and thinking about God's majesty helps. and Seihout finally returned my call so at least I know he's going tomorrow.

anyway, to puff off some steam, it's just so tiring to think about jobs (internships), planning stuff (ski trip is such a nightmare), i haven't really thought about the studying bit, guess that's the least of my worries since most things are structured. hah. alright i shouldn't really dwell on these things cos they'll just make me more depressed.

but the summary is that i didn't get much sleep last night cos was prepping for interview, ditto today.. and after my interview i had various meetings (including some akpsi-only mckinsey info session and all these recruiting things are very intimidating), was reminded of the lack of initiative i have wrt sas, definitely could do a lot more and i don't know where the new year resolution went. and ski trip is really really such a nightmare, i really pray that everything works out and we'll have a good time.

masters students make up the bulk of the participants, and i didn't send out the word early enough about the trip so they planned their own and booked their own place. so we ended up with very few people and lack of drivers. i guess it's not that huge a problem.. dunno la.

maybe i just wasn't cut out for all this. but no, my parents are spending so much money and i'm just tired right now. so so tired. i should sleep. at least there's only cs tmr. and the first week of school will be over.

so i'm back! man i'm still kind of tired.. not really ready to go out and face the stanford world. haha okay that sounds so dramatic. but didn't get much sleep on the plane, my room is so comfortable i don't want to go out, and, as i was telling jon, have to be nice and social. sometimes its the fear (or inertia) that's worse than the actual thing though. many times, in fact. blah.

but i'm sort of unpacked! so that's good. and my expensive black jacket is nice and warm so i'm happy:) at least it was money well spent, i hope. alright i need to stop procrastinating! and i actually kind of miss jackie's aircon cos its a bit hot (it's more like fall weather rather than winter, isn't that crazy? not complaining though).

okay! to work! work work work so i can sleep in peace!

augh. i am in such a weird mood today. i can't even figure myself out! anyway.. it was nice meeting sean n joel again. haven't seen them for so long. haha okay not actually that long but well.. much less often than last (academic) year. i also realized i'm not all that plugged into the christian community there.

we ate SO much though.. the kolo mee was pretty good. and then milo dinosaur! haha. i actually haven't had a milo dinosaur before but well. it was good:) it's so weird to think joel's engaged already! and thinking about marriage and saving up. it's like having to grow up too fast.. i dunno. sort of like mrs cheriyan saying yesterday that she felt so weird when her student came back (years later) pregnant and she had to take a moment to accept that fact heh.

and then island creamery! and sean gave me a lift to orchard, so nice of him. and it was starting to rain so i was v thankful for the lift heh. tea with chris n lyd was fun!! chris got us such nice earrings from HK.. i'm wondering how come i never saw such nice things. i need to find nice shops online to buy stuff for pple man.

oh and we were playing some board game.. was kinda fun haha. poor lyd kept (in her words) 'visiting tourist attractions and having to pay', and it sort of reminded me of that crazy monopoly game we played during thanksgiving where we ended up in two huge alliances wondering who'd go bankrupt first. so ridiculous.

charlotte's web was so cute. but kind of sad at the end when charlotte died. i think i was kinda sad too when reading the book (a looong time ago). and somehow in the middle of the movie i was thinking about how i only have like one day left here. i really thought i'd got over the whole leaving thing already, but i guess when i really realize it after brushing it off for the most part it's worse??

and during dinner lyd was asking me if i thought my ability to make friends was 'handicapped' by the fact that i don't drink. maybe it is.. i dunno. aiyah. some things i just don't really want to think about.

anyway.. oh yes. so i guess all my mixed feelings built up to this point.. and then i ended up taking it out on this random guy who approached lyd (while she was talking to me too, how rude!) and wanted to get to know her. and apparently it's happened before so she's kinda used to it. after she said no, he wanted to either give her his phone no/get hers. and but i think i was kind of at this breaking point and something just snapped in me and i snapped at the guy 'she said no! leave us alone!' actually i guess that wasn't a very nice thing to do, but the guy looked =so= sketchy and i thought he was going to continue pestering us or something. i still don't really know what got into me but lyd was like ok u're really in quite a bad mood, that was so unclar.

notable event of the evening haha. nice spending time w lyd though, pity didn't have as much time to hang out w chris. sigh.. i will get one-suite or something so i can call people. oh daryl recommends futurephone.com, must go check it out too.

pretty long day again! man it's been so long since i stayed out that late last night.. (thurs night that is) so on thurs: went out at 1ish to shop. attempt to shop would be more accurate, since i didn't find the low-priced long-sleeved shirts i was hoping to find, so not a very successful trip.

and i was very tired of walking by the time i met lyd so i was like !! time for food! haha. we had a very nice late-lunch-tea meal at tcc though:D i think i spend too much money :| and then it proceeded to rain!!! so heavily! :( ah well.

meeting jm and eunice was interesting.. one from uk one from australia and me from us! kinda cool. and rather different. i didn't know the NUS bidding system was so annoying.. poor people! very thankful that stanford doesn't really run out of spaces for important classes.

so i got back pretty late and (for once) was quite tired but i stayed up reading seabiscuit (again), one of my fav books:) and then i didn't really feel like going out today but i'm glad i did:)

so much fun! ms tan is hilarious.. never fails to amuse me. really love annoying her haha:p although i felt a bit weird cos i just went back in july (or something) with serene.. but serene talks so much. and i also forgot peiying was in ms tan's form class in sec 1. haha.

and you also don't realize how much teachers gossip (or talk about us) until you're in there listening to them:p but it was interesting anyhow.. and meeting mrs deborah tan was so weird. she told us we must set up an emotional bank account (i.e. build good feeling) so you can ask pple for favours next time. aiyah i think basically it's networking la.

anyway. i am beginning to feel the force of the oncoming quarter.. i think if i don't get into my introsems i'll take 17 units and preserve my sanity and hopefully by God's grace get a good internship. aaahh.

haha this is the 601th post. anyway yay, this shouldn't sound as depressive as the last. and i finally saw shaun after two years (hello shaun! if you happen to read this). i guess he is right though, if you don't see people for a long time you've a lot more things to say. or it could also swing the other way and you'd feel really awkward and have nothing to say. i wonder which happens more often. feels like the latter wouldn't really happen as much but you never know.

yay i finally managed to upload my hongkong photos on facebook. link on the left! thinking about changing my template again but lazy to find a new one.. actually given that i'm so free i shouldn't be, but when i feel like i have to do things i'll procrastinate on them -_- blargh.

oh! so i have a mentor (stanford alum) and then i kept pushing back writing an introductory email to her until tuesday, and then when she replied she said she literally just left singapore. sigh. i could've actually met up with her!! augh. i need to learn from these things. and missing deadlines. blagah.

and on mon/tues night i was clearing out one of my drawers and i found all manner of interesting things.. including this sheet of notepaper where i wrote down a couple of quotes. so i think this was in apr 04, and my dad said to me, "nobody will care if you don't do well in your SATs/can't get into a good university. the choir's not going to come together and sing you a song." i think at that point the issue was that i was spending too much time doing choir stuff. i guess they (parents) just weren't used to me actually spending time on CCAs, given that automation was so slack.

new year. i didn't really feel like going to church but i'm glad i did.. one of the youth (or 'yout' as they call themselves haha) was giving one of the messages, was pretty cool cos i've never seen him serve! and his msg was pretty good although i dun really remember a huge chunk of it cos i didn't have my notebook to write stuff down. and by the time we got through the second exhortation and one hour's worth of praying, my mind was quite fried. oh and the hour worth of praying was thanksgiving for the past year and requests for the new year.

grar facebook isn't letting me upload my photos! !! bah. oh i can upload a church photo here. and photos of the stuffed toys that my bro won at ocean park (two of those game thingys where you're supposed to throw balls into holes).


so i met up with candice and fiona today.. so good to see them! and it was easy to talk to them. cos it's like sometimes with other people it's awkward and have to think pretty hard to find stuff to talk about. actually that happens really quite a bit more often then i'd like it to. i'd also like to believe that's cos i'm always meeting new people but that's probably not the case.

really depends on my mindset at the moment i guess. whether i'm in the 'ooh we must meet people today and it's fun!' or 'aw man this is going to be such a chore' mode. anyway.. yeah. i guess it also helped that they're good frens so they can like bounce off each other. if that makes sense. and candice when you read my blog you ought to tag so i can 'talk' to you since you're never online! -sulks-

oh and church was kind of interesting. i've never really felt like part of my church, which is quite tragic. i also like to blame my parents for that but if i'd had my priorities right when i was younger i guess it wouldn't be such an issue. dunno la. i miss chi alpha though. and campbell. so i think i ought to go for thanksgiving service tomorrow but i don't feel like it cos i know i'm going to feel so awkward. yup. that's me. awkward.

okay this is starting to sound slightly depressive. it shouldn't! happy new year! haha. i am so lazy. need to find something better to do with my time. i keep pushing everything to next week (well, this week, already) telling myself i don't want to think about school stuff while it's 2006. procrastinate. ahhh.

yay it was good meeting pam today:) she got me wondering though. whether pri gep was really that influential. i mean i did really like chinese then, we had so many fun games and chinese was really cool:) and a lot of my closer friends now were fr pri gep but maybe that was just a self-perpetuating sort of thing.. we'd already been through 3 years so in sec sch it was pretty normal, just a continuation?

anyway. and she was saying she's not very good at a group friendship sort of thing.. and i totally agree for me too. prefer one-on-one. although sometimes i wonder if pple get bored. but yeah.. the group friendship thing. is kind of like draw groups hanging out.

alright hopefully i'll be back in the shopping mode next week cos i do need to buy stuff. and i hope the sales last oh dear. ahh. anyway tomorrow is stay-at-home day, will potter about and just enjoy being home:)

i think i may be overdependent on the internet. no actually it's just because i was trying to get on the sms website last night. i think. anyway.. so i was rather annoyed yesterday when the taiwan earthquake rendered our internet quite slow and useless! therefore i went to bed. okay la i was tired too.. long day.

haha i always laugh so much when i'm out with rachel. even though at first it's a bit awkward cos i haven't seen her in so long (same with everyone else i guess) after that i always end up laughing really hard cos we're so ridiculous:D yay squishy squid 2! oh i forgot to bug you to do your credit card application.. let me msg you now. haha i can't believe you stored my number under 'squishy squid'! -sulks- and we forgot to take a photo:( nevermind i'll come to TLL and disturb u n christine sometime.

and it was such a pity that we couldn't watch night at the museum at vivocity! but that place is ridiculously crowded.. -_- oh well. lyd's laugh is so happy, i wish i could bottle it up and bring it with me wherever i go. well i would bottle up lyd but since that's not very possible, the laugh goes just as well:)

it was nice to see chris (on tues night now) after so long. need to hang out another time! i can't believe it's been a year. i think i need to be better at calling up people to keep in touch.. new year resolutions:) the only thing being that now the sch year and calendar year don't coincide so it's really weird. new sch year or new calendar year resolution? guess i can have both.

some things are just very confusing. i suppose i think too much cos i'm too free. haha. and now i don't really feel like shopping! shopping overload from hongkong. oh it was so interesting, when it started raining last night 心雨 by jay chou came into my mind. kind of apt huh? even though i guess the 心雨 isn't really literal.

oh yingheng's story about his tuition kid and learning new words was hilarious.. so they're supposed to write down words they don't know and find out the meaning (to expand their vocab). and one day one of the kids came up with this four-letter word which means a small rock with mould on it. and i couldn't stop laughing because for crying out loud, why in the world would you ever use that word so why would you write it down? but it was hilarious:)

yayy i'm home! finally. i think a week in hongkong was too long. or maybe cos i was longing to come back. i like familiarity. and having my stuff around (i.e. so i'm not really completely happy cos i'd prefer having my own computer:p) but it's still good!

anyway i really went crazy with the photo taking and video taking, i didn't think i was going to use the whole 1gb memory card for my camera, but right now its at like 900mb 0_0 the power of expanding watever you call it. umm. expanding to fill whatever you have (or in this case, expanding to use the entire memory card:p)

but i don't know if i'm going to transfer stuff out cos firstly i'm supposed to install the driver. we'll see.

it's really good to be with my family again though. i wonder what the europe pple are doing now though heh. ie cs jon bertram etc. and what serene is up to. maybe i should use trillian instead hm.

and i can't sms properly anymore!:( my US cell phone keys are so much easier to press than my sg cell:( haha i'm sure i'll regain it with practice:p oh well.

oh and i'm now in love with bo luo baos:) yumyumyum. they are SO good. especially if the dough is good.. sigh! can't believe i didn't discover them earlier. maybe daryl will go crazy over them too haha. as compared to egg tarts, which are really good too!

alright. i don't know if i'm still up for more shopping.. hongkong shopping was, as dawn said, pretty stressful cos there're so many choices!! augh. and it is so hard to find xmas presents. i totally agree with this column in monday's straits times about how it's so forced to have to find presents for xmas. like if i don't see stuff that i think they'll like it's kind of hard to force a present! maybe i'm just making excuses though.

kk. maybe i'll go take a nap.

ahh. i guess i'm calmer today. thank you god. i believe he will be with me and help me through this crazy crazy time. and yay for colin who was pretty calming. and for jon (who albeit went on and on about his crazy courseload last semester while i'm like okay.. i'm kind of half-resigned to my fate and want to sleep soon_ but he was still pretty encouraging). i guess reading shaowei's blog about drawing closer to god in times of trouble is kinda true.

and of cos for dearest jackie.. i was like 'wat do you do when you're totally freaking out?' and she made me close my eyes and described a 'happy place' for me, which was hilarious (stress-reliever yeahh:) because it started off with a forest (i just knew that was gonna be it!) and then i would've been pretty satisfied with a forest and cute cuddly animals but she went on with descriptions of money (and dulce de leche cheesecake) growing on trees and cities with goodness knows what else, i don't remember.. and the crowning glory of 'hot men' - at this point i was like okay, i think i was quite happy with the cute animals.

so.. i'm gonna rock this final! (and the next, and the next, and the next.) there. that covers all four.

but anyway.. the real point of my doing a quick blog (study break, haha - philosophy drains my mental faculties). it was kinda hilarious really, jackie went to sleep after i got up.. well done girl. yesterday she got up at ~6pm and i'm like. you do know you completely missed daylight? and she was like well actually i saw some of it before i went to bed. ... haha.

alright to the point! a package came for her (while i was figuring out the mysteries of life, no less. rofl) and i was just thinking i never really knew the joy of receiving packages until coming here! it is so fun.. like little presents. i mean, even if it's just online shopping.. when the stuff comes (like my camera :D yay) it's just great!

anyway. couple more hours and i'll be done with philo woohoo!

woahh. that just completely blew my mind.. i definitely did not know my bro's very good fren's now at goldman.. anyway. i really need to stop procrastinating so much. and i have also decided (after various mishaps) that i work better with a paper planner (as compared to electronic calendars) so i'm going shopping for one during the holidays! whee~
(typed that a couple of days back but never posted it)

this is today:
AUGHHH damn stressed. okay actually this is really my fault for not doing my studying earlier but yeah. still stressing out anyway. so i just whined at poor chuansheng. haha. so for philo at least i've looked at all the stuff (i am SO so SO thankful for the study grp if not i would never have gotten anything done) but thinking of objections and counter objections and reconstructing arguments all take time, of which i have a severe lack of.

bio should be fine i think. but econ 52 is going to take me a substantial amount of time given that i haven't read some of the chapters and i need to prep for the essay stuff. and econ 102a i really need to prac, of which that requires time TOO. help help help. it also does not help that i'm reading about stress stuff for bio (or i just finished doing that). at this point praying also does not help me very much, i'm just panicking too much at this point.

wow. god is really great. i can't remember at the moment who else's testimony i heard.. but it's just stories like that which remind me how in power he is. and the power of prayer. okay that probably didn't come out sounding too right since i'm not particularly coherent but well.

crazy event of the day: so me n jackie were trying to figure out about going to paris for spring break.. and i was like oh i have the calendar i'll check the dates of spring break. so i came over to my table.. and i picked up my calculator instead of my calendar.

it was quite a classic moment, really. but i must say in defence of myself that usually my calendar and calculator are like next to each other/one's on top of the other so i'm slightly justifed..

i decided to post a pic of my pretty snowboard! here it is:)


it unfortunately looks much worse now. but plus cute traction bits that jon pasted for me! whee~

and all the people i met!

the girls: liana (jr), joon (soph), me


the guys: jon (jr), yongji (frosh), andrew (frosh), zhixiu (jr), yf


more of the guys: nick (on exchange), ryan (he's really like the uiuc-version-of-daryl haha), dominic (soph), josh (soph)


random pics of my room

forever friends bedspread!


yay forever friends poster from ser!:)


my slightly messy desk


front part is jackie's half


i should really do my work. and it was so tragic, chris decided to nominate me for akpsi secretary and i'm like. oh. oops. i don't have a laptop! but anyway i don't think i could handle an ecomm position this year. hopefully i'll be something next year though. will see what god has in store for me.

simps playdate thing today was kind of awkward.. i don't know why. i thought it would be somewhat like a regular class, just go in and play games. but somehow the connection was missing (like kenneth said). things weren't very funny.. maybe energy not thre? or just awkward cos it was like.. simps vs 103ers. oh well.. reiterate last sentence of last para. if it's meant to be it will happen, i believe. i tried my best.

dead week and it doesn't feel like it at all. or i'm still slacking around.. i don't understand why i need food so much when i'm here. like during thanksgiving i wasn't very hungry or thinking about food all that much. didn't really snack. or maybe cos snacks were so easily at hand it didn't matter that much. but when i'm back in my dorm room.. it's just. food. food. food. ! so bad:(

man today is one crazy day.. but yay! i have my license! which just prompted me to call my mom and say happy bday, thanks to the wonders of the chi alpha calling card. she's so cute, she sent me this encouragement card sort of thing with my airticket home.

so yeah, i wasn't sure if i got my driving test time right.. and then yinnah's car malfunction light came on and i wasn't sure if the driving test pple were going to be okay with that.. and then we had to wait so long for the test. but phew, thanks for God's grace, everything went fine. and i passed! woohoo~ i saw the examiner who failed me last time, thankfully this time it was a guy and he was much nicer.

oh and while waiting for my test jh calls me and says that they decided i'm part of the team for the JPMorgan competition thing and i'm like !! i haven't done anything for it! man. feel kinda bad about it also but it'll be great experience if we get through.. so then i have to think about looking at resumes/personal statements/writing my own.

and the concerto thing was such a fiasco! man. that was seriously one of my worst nightmares. like i knew i wasn't particularly prepared.. but that was just terrible. the tempo was so much faster than i'd expected and my fingers can't move that fast.. lack of practice/skill. i guess i should've just called jon (aow) up earlier and admitted defeat.. but i still thought i could manage it but i practised like mad tonight/tmr. and then after like 50mins i could tell they thought i was hopeless and i also knew it was hopeless.. really thank God that jon was free/can manage it.. actually i was pretty sure he'd be able to, am just so grateful though. cos i already wasted the guy's and his teacher's time.. don't wanna ruin his performance as well. so phew.

anyway, am feeling so much better. yay for being online haha i sound like i'm addicted. oh well. time to do silly econ pset. and it's so freaking cold nowadays!:( i forgot how depressing winter is =sulks=

aaahh. i'm so tired. or at least my eyes are, i think. i don't actually think i got more sleep during thanksgiving break cos the place i was staying at (with junwan & frens, no less) had skylight-ish panels which allow morning sun to shine right into the room and wake me up! so i got up at like 7ish almost all the time. oh well. gotta make up for that soon.. after tonight's black friday shopping heh. and i also need to figure out my driving test:| augh. i wish i'd passed the first time, it would've made my life so much easier!

anyway, had lots of fun in colorado, am very glad i decided to go join joon! yayyy:) her friends are all so nice.. actually jon (goh)somewhat reminds me of sean, i guess its the way they interact with/care about people. and i really wish i had sean's knee pads. haha. arrgh! poor knees. actually poor snowboard, it definitely got chipped by ice/rocks/something. -sob- oh well.

pics on facebook..
http://stanford.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2046548&l=da600&id=213134
okay i don't actually know if the link works but we'll see. maybe i'll dump them in shutterfly when the rest send the other photos along or something.

sigh! 86 emails to plough through and i have to return to reality (i.e. having to think about classes/work/jobs/.... moooo.) laundry calls soon. and practising for this bass trombone concerto accompaniment! man i really hope it turns out fine.. help.

i think the hot tub does help. or at any rate, me n joon n liana were trying to figure out how come we didn't ache as much yesterday.. as compared to the days before. alright. need to get stuff done! its nice to just slack around.. hm.

boohoo. clar is like half sick. i guess i just refuse to admit i'm fully sick. but i'm not! okay, in denial. but anyway i kept hiccuping yesterday cos my throat was dry and everytime i coughed that kinda triggered it. 0_0 . oh well.. at least today should be better.. i wish i was completely well though, how to go snowboarding otherwise?? and i wish we'd booked a later ticket so i can go to the burton sale and get a snowboard. :( . i guess god will provide..

so yesterday's chi alpha worship was quite magical. sicheng was telling esther 'i think we brought back something from that trip!' [they drove 4 hrs to redding over the weekend, i dunno wat was happening at the church but that's interesting]. i still have a tiny suspicion about whether my experience was partly because of my sleep deprived state.. philo paper due yesterday, that is. and bio midterm today and i haven't read anything for econ essay, die!! gotta rush that during lunch or something :|

but wat colin said was good and timely. god will give you exactly what you need. i like the phrasing too. somehow that just reminded me of sean, i wonder why. maybe the big-bro-christian-encouragement thing. which is good. haha man this is like a spillover from my philo paper about "the human good". aahh!

it was so uncanny yesterday cos during improv there was this static scene involving a bicycle, a squirrel and a nut (i.e. the bike was about to run the squirrel over). and then while i was furiously biking (like the wind, no less, as jackie likes to advise me when i'm hard pressed for time/late in handing up stuff which unfortunately happens rather often) to turn in my phil paper, this stupid black squirrel (with a brown nut! augh!) ran directly across my oncoming path!! i was like wth!! wat's ur problem! outraged. haha. i wish i had a picture of that though. i really thought i might've run over the stupid squirrel. :p

sigh i feel so stupid. so jackie's taking a nap and so i was working with just my desk lamp.. and then i turned it off and attempted to make my way to the door to go for dinner. and -taadaa- i tripped over her suitcase or something and hit my head on the fridge corner. very very painful. my first thought was like i want my mommy haha and then after that i got paranoid that this knock has addled my brains. cos i'm doing this bio course on intro to brain and behavior and there're lots of stories about how if certain parts of your brain are damaged then it'll effect some behavioral effect and i was thinking wat if i knocked this part which unblocks all the childhood inhibition thingys and i start behaving like a kid. 0_0.

i hope i'm being paranoid at any rate. and it somewhat reminds me of bertram's story earlier about how some SJI kid got knocked by a shot putt (imagine that! poor guy) and apparently became a genius after that. haha. oh well. thankfully for peling my poor RA who walked to wilbur to get ice for me.

it also doesn't help that i'm not feeling too great.. nose clogging up and swallowing hurts. augh! i will not get sick! more smoothies. yay for jamba juice and late nite.

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