wahh. poor tired clar. and i really should learn my lesson about doing last minute things. today ate dinner at like 10+ because had to do last minute shopping. at least i've finally gotten all my stuff. one day before the prom? haha. well done clar.
lunch was hilarious.. was really glad lyd came:) provided much amusement. and jane u've the funniest comments/actions. and i finally returned poor chris her saltimbanco vcd [thanks for being so patient:p] always comfortable to be around gd frens:) yayyy happy day. tho bad pam didn't come hmph i will scold her tmr.
anyway. i have to go dig out the quotes from my phone.. here're some i remember anyway
lyd wants bread
jane "u should go to olio dome"
lyd didn't hear her properly "wat?" -bread skids off the tray- "oops". -uses tongs to put bread back-
jane "u should go to olio dome"
lyd looks bemused "but i'm here!"
lyd suggests giving chris an iron for her housewarming
chris "why?"
lyd "aren't u spposed to give useful things for the house at housewarmings?"
chris "oh. i thought u were u insinuating my clothes were crumpled"
haha. so cute. my dearest sec 4 classmates [okay fine jane's not a classmate but as good as lar]
i must organise another outing just for lydia before she whacks me again the next time i meet her.
alright better go pack and everyth. tmr's one busy day.. hope we'll have a fun time. and my uni essays are still half past six/not done.
haha i just browsed thru my blog archives and found that I wrote this on 16 June : “mugging is so tiresome and boring. how i'm going to last until november is a mystery to me.” and it's the start of december already. how time flies. it always seems like forever until it's over and then where has the time gone?
how do i find something unique about myself? sometimes i don't even feel like i know myself. okay these are quite useless questions haha time to think.
haha i just watched save um's on playhouse disney for fun and discovered the show was on a dirty baby dino! haha was most amused. baby dino played in mud and then got all dirty and unhappy.. so its baby sitters had to call the save um's for help. after some fruitless scrubbing, baby dino cried and its tears washed its face clean so yippee they realised water makes dirt turn to mud so its easier to clean off! haha. it was really funny lar. i think i'm deprived k nvm. light amusement.
aiyah. i feel so unoriginal and cliched when i'm writing my essays. i need a better brain. so much for instilling creativity i don't feel like i've any in me. grr. maybe if i buy myself an opal and stare at it the changing colours will inspire me haha. pathetic excuses.
ooh. finally got berkeley app done [terribly last minute i must say, like a lot of things i do:s] and got my gown! haha. i really have expensive taste *shakes head* but was quite funky lar the designer was there and advised on how to wear the gown and stuff like that.. for the moment i felt so rich and pampered haha got personal advisor.. anyway i still have to get necklace and i think i'm done! yay..
anyway. i must say i really don't like last minute thingys. i remember waking up and feeling this horror at the fact that i'd have to get up and face my essay [which is still unsatisfactory actually] AGAIN. oh well at least it's done.. hopefully it got in on time and everyth'll be fine n i didn't waste my money.
and i was the latest for a*star oops. at least i went. better late than never? i hope so anyway. and hardly saw many pple i knew.. looks like most pple are interested in firefly/psc rather than a*star huh. but they're really very sciencey. n tt gal ended up telling us abt illinois instead of a*star.. like trying to promote US education.. like anyone needs to do tt.. everyone wants to go already. i think i've said that b4. oh well. and then i was thinking they really don't bother much about leadership stuff.. some of their presenters were SO soft.. could hardly hear them speaking lar. which makes quite a change from the normal scholarship requirements.
ah i'm so glad taufik won:) he's really versatile. and his voice control is terrific! heh. i thought the show focussed too much on the 2 of them tho i was getting really bored of seeing them only.. wanted to see more of the final 11.. i mean like we've been seeing these 2 for 6 months and the rest for maybe 3 only or so? on average. was nice to see all 11 take to the stage though. miss jeassea and beverly and david. they're really good lar. besides the fact that beverly doesn't seem v gd with public relations heh. anyway i thought jeassea n bev did the independent woman song quite well..
owch. neckache. i shall do more essays tmr. and i shall break the cycle of sleeping past 1am tonight hopefully
ooh. tired. i've been out 3 consecutive days [well, half days?] and i'm quite tired. will be just glad to stay at home tomorrow n sort out my stuff.. and get rest.. haha..
anyway.. planning movie outings is so difficult!! sigh.. okay lar its prob cos i went to sign up for all manner of scholarship tea sessions n got stuff on n etc tts why. no lar actually the fri outing was quite okay. partly cos lijia helped me msg py n joon:) and nxt fri was quite easy too just call all 3. but now i dun even noe if the movie's showing aiyoh:s nvm lar we'll still have fun bumming around:) the good old french immersion days.. scotch-tape cutting skills anybody? ah but none of them read my blog so nvm..
today ah.. ooh i liked lunch loads haha:p it was good eating w everyone:) too bad aud, candice n chelsea weren't around.. wud've been more complete in a way. umm lemme see well pool was funny.. my aiming a bit off today tho heh must be the lack of practice. i wish i had a table like denise [choong]. haha. and her wonderful resort house. but that's out of point. fiona's so cute haha. and ser u're actually quite okay wat i dun see why u keep saying u're lousy.
anyway. yay. tmr is a day at home finally. so funny.. nvm i shall attempt to compile my quotes hopefully. and have a nice slackish time. aiyah am not thinking already.. somehow writing uni app thingies is interesting in a way but tedious in other ways.. i guess it's been a long time since i sat down and wrote non-gp essays haha.
wow. i'm free. it hasn't really set in fully but i'm so glad i don't have to come back and hit the books anymore. for a few months haha:D but chem s wasn't fantastic lar. i shouldn't have spent so much time vacillating about which qn to do and end up leaving so many marks blank. sigh. and i should have done organic 1st instead of panicking at physical cos mind wasn't v clear to start with. hope everyth goes fine tho *prays v hard*
anyway had a few interesting discussions with eunice today while walking around trying to find mom's present. [unsuccessfully i might add]. like how sometimes u don't know if things u remember are just the snapshots that u took, or that u really remember wat u saw there in ur mind. i don't really know how to explain it. and sometimes when you have dreams that are so real, u start to wonder.. what is reality anyway? or i do sometimes at any rate.
and i was telling her that i feel so sorry for children today.. it's like all those pre-school nurturing classes and wat not.. and have to cultivate entrepreneurial spirit so they've to start doing stuff and come up with business ideas and all sorts of rubbish.. there's no joy in being a child! where's the fun gone? do children still know how to play? i mean i remember things like my mom letting me go visit my neighbour and play at her house for a while then must come back n do work later.. or going to the cc with my brother n neighbours to play badminton and stuff like tt.. it doesn't seem like pple do tt nowadays. [okay these i really remember, nothing to do with photos] and they're all stuck to computer games and wat not. but again since i don't have a younger sibiling or anything i wouldn't really know wats happening generally but the impression i get is really sad.
anyway. feels good to be free. i can finally sleep without worrying [hopefully] and wake up anytime i like! woohoo!~ i have been forcing myself to sleep less for these past few weeks i think. out of desperation. i really hope it pays off. sometimes i really think wat emilyn said is right: here, mediocrity is a sin.
ok lar shouldn't be so melancholic. ka [new show by cirque du soleil] opens today! woohoo!~ maybe that's a good sign for me:) i shall order their cd. or maybe i should make my bro buy for me haha perhaps shipping within usa is easier. anyway. happiness! for now anyway;)
argh. horrible biotech paper yesterday - i was laughing while thinking of how to explain for 3 marks how one colouring is extracted from a named organism. i think the girl sitting nxt to me frm 3e i think? must have thought i'd gone berserk. anyway i ended up writing something really vague about crushing cochineal beetles so maybe they'll be kind and gimme 2 marks for that? haha. crazy cambridge lar how'd u expect us to know.. maybe if we write something halfway sensible they'll be satisfied.
now for math s. sigh. i can't believe how stupid i was.. not to realise how to do integration by substitution until time was up. and forgetting mr chan's nicely-stapled paper on my stats assignment! crumbs.. tt'd have cost me like 5 marks or sth. this is not a time when one can afford to forget things, given i didn't do that many marks in the 1st place. anyway. i'm just praying i get an m at least.. sigh. shattered dreams. there's only chem s left to dream about. and work for.
so i've 4 more papers. and then i'm finally free! but there's physics to get thru 1st, bio to pull up my so far horrendous papers. aahh. disillusioned. i think i'm going to get constant nightmares about horrible results. which hopefully won't materialise. i'd prefer my results to be a pleasant surprise thanks very much.
but it was nice to see yongjeng today, been ages since i met choir j1s.. tho i kinda pity them for 5 o'clock pracs during holidays heh. but again they've the whole day to slack so why'm i being sympathetic? haha. and can go for supper aft tt somemore. k it's not such a bad deal aft all.
ohh i had this weird dream about choir 2 days back i think. j2s went back to join j1s and then din memorise songs properly so the lyrics all disappeared. it was quite terrible actually. and i thought ms low/mr toh were going to start scolding and then i can't remember wat else happened. and yest's weird dream was connected to the 7o'clock ch8 show. and somehow there were labrador/golden retriever puppies featured haha. sth like quill. very queer.. must be my overstressed mind.
hmm. i think i'm very harsh on myself. i was really really fuming at myself some time after the malay woman said no more writing.. cos i realised how stupid i was putting an obviously wrong answer for the zinc+acid thing. gah. then later whined to serene and fiona whined to me then felt bit better knowing i'm not the only one who screwed up. haha. anyway. last week! it's [to quote ser] a frightening week though. as it was yesterday i was suddenly thinking wat if nxt yr i go get results and end up with b's n c's then i'm done for. aiyah. everyth's worrying. just pray and pray and pray that everyth'll end up fine.
yeah. frightening week of bio paper 3 + phys paper 3 [i really hope these go better than the paper 2] + 2 s papers + phys design [i hope these go better than prelims if not i'm done for also] + bio mcq. sigh. i foresee a stressful week. at least after that we'll be free. in a way. haha. then i'll have to do berkeley apps already:s super last minute lar oh well wat to do.
and then i shall go buy myself lots of cds haha:D and new clothes and such. oh yes and i'll have to get myself to exercise if not i can't fit into my clothes anymore with all the snacking.
oh i heard the ben1 track frm sun yan zi's new cd on the advert.. it's a bit rockish or sth? i should really learn to differentiate btwn the genres. anyway it's so unlike her. but it's different. quite interesting.
ooh i've also decided i like songs frm musicals.. this is the moment frm dr jekyll n mr hyde! that taufik sang yesterday.. oh sly's performance of music of the night was really sad lar.. cannot make it lar go sing chinese pop.
okay since i haven't blogged since saturday here i am. wasn't planning to blog actually but nevermind. physics was rather nightmarish. okay it wasn't that bad but wasn't fantastic. maybe cos i didn't prepare v well hum. and was slightly panicky. and rusty. and therefore unsure of answers.
anyway like i always say, ignorance is bliss. how'd you know the majority's correct anyway? i think tt was my philosophy for o's and recently readopted thanks to weiying's advice haha:D to quote her she "always runs away after exams" so can't compare answers.
ahh. i want to go out. i decided peiying's way of looking at everyth is quite good haha. she told me while waiting for parents to come. there's only one week left! and after that we've 9 months before going back to school haha. [even tho i was predisposed to taking the gloomy view and telling her we've to do biotech n s papers this weekend]
yesterday was napping at 1+ [pm] and didn't wanna get up! so comfy:) and then it started raining later. hais. but i had to get up cos my physics was half baked. i'm not sure it isn't now sigh. it's such a joke sometimes all you learn for 2 years and they don't test u on half of it anyway. maybe they should come up with other ways besides exams to gauge abilities and i don't mean project work. i remember this essay in the gp bulletin about how exams aren't a true reflection of how well the student will be able to cope in the working world. so so true.
anyway enough of exams.. freedom! sigh. lucky candice's sister.. her last paper is tmr! incidentally it's also chem mcq. i think i'll always remember 26 nov. end of o levels in the afternoon. and now end of a levels in the evening too. of cos it's also candice[cheng]'s bday haha. haven't seen her in ages!
oh surprisingly i think i'll miss rj. kind of. and our crazy lessons n teachers n classmates n lecturers. not in that order though. i shall compile my quotes. oh here's one i found rather amusing [sorry ser:p]
in sec 4: bio teacher mrs lee asks "wat precautions should you take while counting bubbles?"
ser "don't blink"
lemme go dig out a few more to amuse myself
ohh here's another. during farewell assembly i was sitting with sarah n her bball fren then mr chan [math] walked past. n sarah's fren asked "Mr chan why checkered shirt today ah?" then he replied [quick as lightning i might add] "graph paper"
it was really apt cos it was a white shirt with black (or grey or sth) lines criss-crossing. ah basically it really did look like graph paper with huge squares haha.
one day during bio lect: ser "don't you think candice looks like a christmas tree in red (her sweater) and green (RJ skirt)?"
candice turns around "i HEARD that"
me "being angry won't make you look any less like a christmas tree" [at this pt fiona i think scolded me for being mean. but let me defend myself, i didn't agree with ser, i was just making a point:]
eunice while presenting current affairs about civet cats with SARS in china [this was last yr]
"you kill it while it's alive"
last one for the day.. mr chan [bio] 's view on our Mt Sinai campus being used for NUS High Sch or whoever it is.. "it's a mighty big school for 100 students.. you could literally stuff one student in each toilet!"
was extremely annoyed this morning.. i think i woke up at 6 and then 8 and finally 9.30. was terribly annoyed cos i couldn't sleep properly due to itchy mosquito bites.. got up.. my mom made me eat sweet potato for breakfast [and i absolutely hate it] and then i went to put on insect repellent to prevent repeat of the mosquito bites.. ended up getting some on my watch which caused part of the strap to dissolve.. which served to anger me further.. there's really nothing like waking up on the wrong side of the bed. anyway so i had to avoid touching anything plastic and was getting v paranoid abt stuff. and very frustrated.
at least i think i'm fine now after eating my ice cream n listening to some music [i shall go buy somemore cds aft a's! haha.. have just discovered nice new site - www.soothingmusic.com i haven't figured out wat the track playing is though]
aiyah! i'm so annoyed at math... can't believe i just assumed it was finding inverse instead of derivative and didn't realise even when wondering why the range was asked only later.. ugh.. sometimes i'm SO smart. bah. and bio was not nice. i figured i mite end up with 71 for the paper! groan. this is partly audry's fault for worrying and influencing me. haha.
yay i finally got lots of sleep for the first time in weeks, decided if i dun sleep i mite end up sick n tts certainly not good. i suddenly feel melancholic too haha. i want to buy all the cirque du soleil music cds. well maybe not all lar only those which are good:D
was listening to e piano concert cd frm eons ago.. such memories haha. okay wasn't eons lar but 3 yrs is quite a bit. i havent' played piano for months i realise.. better practise hard after a's haha. i think my fingers have lost any agility they ever possessed.. typing is just not the same.
alright better stop slacking. on monday night while mugging bio/math i suddenly felt like going shopping! haha. but then when i go shopping i'll be bored anyway. weird clar. and then last night i was reading excerpts frm gerald durrell on the nice food and started thinking i wanted to learn how to cook yummy things n told my mom then she sed i wudn't feel like cooking if it's just for myself so i should go be a chef. which is true so i think when i want nice food i'll just buy it haha. so lazy. oh well. but true it's not efficient to spend all the time/energy getting ingredients and cooking and having to wash up then only one person eats.
feel v restless. and my bill is going to be astronomical this month! augh. as it it i've passed the 300 mark and it's only 10th of nov. partly cos i get bored. haha. then suddenly i'll get sick of smsing. and then my phone buttons aren't responding properly particularly the 7 button. most annoying. time for new phone! after a's
aughhh i dont know wat i'm going to do if results're not good lar. sigh. and it's not like i'm not trying my best. i think? haha. dunno lar. and i miss everyone. how tragic.
ugh i seem to have a problem with my sleep pattern. nap in afternoon, spend one hr slacking b4 i sleep, end up waking up at 7.30 cos it's so freaking bright, get v angry n refuse to wake up so early, try to sleep until 9sth, wake up still v unhappy. i shall attempt to change that today if not i'll be annoyed the whole week. i mean, when one can't even sleep in peace it's time to do something about it.
i suppose i kind of slept my worries away but i think they' re going to come back today when i rediscover my incompetency in tackling a level problems. sigh. no matterin which subject. very tedious. being cooped up within 4 walls does things to you. and yes i know it's my fault for not wanting to exercise either haha well.
anyway so cool! yahoo has a special banner for halloween. if that's wat u call it. i saved the pic yay:D quite a funky gif.
i was just thinking about "o" by cirque du soleil. it is truly a work of art. and then i'm thinking why isn't it possible not to work and just enjoy. but i guess one'd get sick of it after a while. and i think my perceptions of work are too hollywood-based. the power of the media. and sometimes when i'm pessimistic it feels like happiness wasn't meant for me. but of cos tts only cos i'm stuck mugging for the nxt month as usual.
wat a train of disjointed thoughts. so what has 2 yrs of jc given me? i really wonder.. esp tt day i was reading my autographs. i think i've said it before though. i seem to have changed. and not necessarily for the better. so much for never-ending patience and such. or maybe pple just write things that sound nice. nowadays i get annoyed at the slightest things so easily. though i may not necessarily show it. well maybe i'll be fine after everyth is done with.
comment on spore idol: it's quite pathetic actually.. the judges are like solitary individuals sitting there.. they've no camaraderie so it's really boring when they're commenting. i mean the show's about the singers [who aren't actually that wonderful either haha sadly] but it's also about the host [who isn't fantastic but probably one of the best one can find here] and the judges and how they interact. big problem: they don't interact. in my opinion anyway. i was trying to figure out why idol gets stale. and the themes are boring/singers can't bring the style out v well.
okay i should stop complaining. i think chem prac gave me a headache.
i'm so dead. kinda like equate not finishing a paper to suicide, especially when it's a's. i hate double indicators.. didn't know where the end point was.. am just praying that i estimated correctly.. the 2 tables make up 15marks lar if my accuracy's gone i'm done for.. esp when i didnt' finish both designs.. which is like 8marks gone. and i dunno if my qa is correct, anyhow whacked.
alrite i feel a bit better after complaining to lots of pple. thanks everyone:)
blah. these few days i've not felt like waking up. just want to sleep and sleep and forget about all the nasty things. dont' feel like doing anything. maybe it'll disappear after monday.
but really after a's i'll be probably stuck at home doing uni apps/scholarship apps anyway. bleah. it'll never end. oh and yesterday i suddenly thought of the shops at metro stations overseas [actually it was specifically those in france] and missed france + immersion all over again. quite weird the way things just appear in my mind sometimes. i want a holiday again! heh. wishful thinking. there's a long way to go before holidays come. hais.
oh and i've been in the "i'm studying for prelims" mode for so long that i still keep thinking its prelims. although i think somewhere in the back of my mind i noe it's a's.. but the 1st thing tt comes to mind is still prelims.
the pure cinema chillout cd my dad got for free is quite nice!:D recognise some songs frm opera band/bond though.. the way they copy songs is scandalous. okay i suppose it's called modifying but watever it just seemed like copying to me at the moment.
i think i'm never satisfied. that's gd and bad. rowls. i've realised taking photos is actually quite fun.. memories and such? anyway the way baoyi posts all her pics on her blog is quite cool:)
bio prac was disastrous. i don't think i was thinking v clearly. if not i wudn't have drawn the wrong genetic diagram.. can't believe how stupid i was. and started panicking. this paper was kinda unexpected somehow.. only 1 slide. somehow feel like prelims were better. which is not good. esp cos this prac had a lot of open-ended qns, meaning there's a whole lot more room for deduction when u don't explain enough. which is v likely to happen given how i always miss out on main points/keywords.
yeah. and instead of drawing tissue map i drew in the nuclei as well.. forgot lar. totally screwed. let me see wat else.. my tube 4 didn't change colour so i faked a bit at the end. watever lar. not my problem it didn't wanna change. and then all the explanation things.. yeah.. possibly will minus quite a few marks. and that explaining why rice grains don't have same length. i forgot sec 4 work lar stuff abt how it's frm diff plants and wat not. just vaguely talked abt e minor genes and environmental conditions. totally sucky. sigh.
that just about sums it up, some parts of each qn are all screwed. yup. so lovely.
hum. i will learn to do things more in advance in the future. this always happens. but anyway farewell assembly was alright lar. not fantastic. tho i dunno wat i expected. it was so so hot in the hall.. boring.. and i was getting a headache towards the middle of the thing.. but john made a really gd speech though. at least my interest was held. or maybe i'm biased. but whatever it is i think he'll achieve a lot.
umm. yeah. spent the 1st part of the evening rushing about madly getting last minute uni app stuff done. and now i realised something else which might give me some problems. baah. pray for help. worries abound! what to do.
i hope my photos get developed soon. haha pity the one with the guys is in the new roll and won't be developed for some time.. hope it turns out nice! dunno if we moved when serene took the picture. and i think sarah sed me n mrs cheong look alike. humm. i suppose it's the ponytail haha.
today was a bit awkward actually. also partly cos i was sleepy [dunno how come though]. haven't talked to them for a long time so felt a bit weird. anyway i came home and slept a LOT. sigh. my energy level leaves much to be desired.
oh! i din noe smrt took over trans island oops. anyway. the doorbell or watever u call it on the bus was getting on my nerves.. its so loud and jangly and ummm cacophonous. dissonant! yeah that was is. here i was trying to sleep [the seat was rather uncomfortable too i shud bring a pillow w me everywhere i go haha] but every few stops i'd be rudely jarred awake. now tt doesn't sound grammatically correct but nvm. dinnertime. wish i hadn't slept so much if not maybe we'd had gone out to eat jap food. heh.
ahh. haven't found time to sit down and blog abt yesterday. apart from slightly screwing up sats and very uptight while doing the papers it was a nice day!:) whee~
mamma mia was wonderful!!! haha. -goes into ecstasies- come to think of it i can't really pinpoint wat was so good. but i dunno.. the energy level was v high.. e singers/actors were superb [altho i din like the guys playing the dads] and i figured esther hannaford played sophie cos it was matinee performance.. but her voice is nice! and she's a really gd dancer.. wud have liked to see kellie rode act too tho o well can't have everyth..
anyway like i was telling candice i was disillusioned by the cd! sigh. london cast doesn't sound as good as australian cast:( maybe cos of the way it's recorded or sth.. quite sad. but now i'm hooked on abba songs haha they're quite funky actually:D yay
thankew everyone for ur bday wishes!:) and presents! haha. clar is a v happy gal:) [apart frm worrying abt a's / uni apps]
ooh. pleasant surprises:) didn't expect half of my presents.. but thank you everybody:)
unfortunately i woke up worrying about my sat 2s cos i don't feel particularly well prepared for them and i cannot deprove from may sats. bleah. and then mrs lim says she's overloaded with recommendations and can't write for me. or rather, will only write if it's absolutely necessary. therefore i am in a fix. which is of cos, my fault as usual. and as usual, i regret a lot of things. really the amount of things i regret is innumerable. and now i'm wondering if amount is singular or plural.. aaargh.
nvm tmr i'm watching mamma mia! whee~:) n there's this dim sum thingy which i don't know when it will take place [somehow that sentence sounds grammatically incorrect to me too] i shouldn't be such a busy person.. oh well. wat to do. i should go and do something constructive. been sleeping the week away!