hakuna matata

ooh i had a very good day today:)
unfortunately i have taken to the habit of leaving the house late. which makes me late for appointments: oops. but that was partly cos i was regaling melvyn with tales of my escapades in the heartland shops/wet-market.

i must detail my adventures at the above-mentioned places another time.. it's really quite amusing. although, of course, it wasn't exactly very amusing on monday, but the rest of the days when i was in a better mood, i could laugh at myself.

anyway.. today! lunch w lyd pam tinky kahli. in order of arrival, sort of. this is like the 2nd time i've done this.. walk into a restaurant telling the waiters/waitresses i'm looking for friends, wander around in search of them, realise with a start that they're not there yet! (or i've gone blind or sth, choy) and back out of the restaurant to call the pple who're supposed to be there. the first time it was with church pple for the twins' farewell dinner.

okay so we had a fun time.. pam's forever full of nonsense.. she and lyd were just itching to eat up kahli's share (kahli was rather late). there were a number of quotable quotes, but i'm lazy to go check my notebk.
ohh!! kahli and her pink beads!! haha. she didn't want to give lyd her "bubble things" cos -ahem- "these are taoist beads! i went to the temple to get them!"
when questioned on why they were pink, "i dropped them into a bucket of pink paint"
later, elaborating on the pains which she took to get these oh-so-precious beads, "i queued for 2 days on my knees at the temple"
pam "why not on your nephew? so biased!"

sigh.. but it was funny cos it was so silly:)

went to get my shower gel.. and marks n spencers to get stuff for tll pple. and birkenstocks to look at shoes! they're prettier than other comfort shoe brands, but more expensive.. like twice the price! sigh.
then to toa payoh to look for stuff.. was quite tired by then actually. wanted to sleep. haha. and it didn't help that the things i was carrying were all so heavy.. poor me.

and i finally decided to get my butt down to novena. was still looking around trying to find earrings for rachel/something whaley for christine. unfortunately it was to no avail, so they shall have to wait.

treading the familiar way that i've traced and retraced the past 2 months. comfortable in a way. but no, i didn't feel like pulling out the timesheet to ask fernn to sign haha. i was just kinda afraid it'd rain and then i wouldn't be able to walk to newton, but in the end i was late anyway so had no time to walk.

was anticipating shocked/surprised looks at my reappearance. no one at inner recept. pushed open the staff door.. ohh only debbie's there.. ey having class and wtc doing cover class. oh well. nvm at least i got to see zee later for a while heh. haha poor debbie's left all alone writing! maybe the choc biscuits will cheer her (and the rest) up though:)

oh phyllis' shocked look when she walked past and saw me was v funny:) then i popped into tlu to give rachel her pigs and tim-tam (which i had to go to cold storage for cos ntuc didn't have). eng seng was still around. when i look at him i think luohan. hahaha. christine's fault.
followed rachel to library. i'm kinda glad i don't have to tidy it up anymore. it got a bit boring after a bit. after returning the books, rachel decided that they were too lan4 to leave in the library so time to dump it in the lousy books box! ahaha.

pushed past the mirror door.. it was fun to see christine's and shang tyng's shocked looks:) and christine shout "have you packed?" at me thru the door. haha. so charlene opened the door for me and i gave them their choc rolls.

i really don't know how i managed to spend like 50mins there and not realise it. maybe cos of the interruptions of my phone (sms alert) and call from kai-lyn (whereby christine yelled "7pm!" and "newton!" and "dress nicely cos u're going out later!" at her when i was answering kai's qns). and call frm charlene upstairs (i can remember her extension by now, haha).
actually, i only realised i was late when christine and shang tyng asked me wat time i was supposed to go and !!! it was 6.55pm!! ahh. well done, clar. oh and i probably inconvenienced poor shang tyng quite a bit by koping her chair haha. oops.

anyway, time to go.. christine said she was going to trail me, i have no idea why. so i said byebye to debbie n phyllis and went out to paris 4 w cc to find wtc to take her dinner order. n after that byebye to christine and then to rachel.

and dinner! yumyumyum my stingray. haha. i was late. oops. a lot of hilarity, cheukka always says the funniest things. "are there cartwheels in ballet?"
kai-lyn hums part of waltz of flowers tune and -gestures- "cartwheel!"
rofl
oh and cheukka doesn't like chicken cos it comes with bones. something to that effect.

okay now i'm lazy to elaborate, shall go write my own diary.

this is very bad. i can't remember if it happened every night (okay maybe i'm in denial) but i know for certain, last night i was panicking about how many days are left and how my packing is still half-past six. at least today i got down to a little more packing since i stayed at home. and i started reading old school! i think i'm terrible at lit hmm, can't seem to analyse poems very well. or maybe i'm just too lazy (over-used excuse).

like i was telling darryl last night, sometimes i still wish i'd chosen to stay here, but actually i think once i get there i'll have a whale of a time (haha, whale). at least i certainly hope so. have so far remained blissfully ignorant with regard to career choices in the past few months after the state of no-scholarship-ness. weird to have to try to start thinking about it again. or start thinking about anything to do with school, actually.

i was going to visit rg and rj this week before leaving but well. inertia got the better of me? i know i'm too lazy to walk frm bishan mrt to rj. haha, this is why i need a gd pair of walking shoes which i have yet to get. and rg.. bit weird, i don't think i'll have anything much to talk about also except "how're u prepared? excited?". i guess i'll go back during first week of sch nxt year.

and i thought my nick was supposed to inform pple of my flight and all so i wouldn't have to keep telling pple 9.15am!! sometimes it still doesn't work. oh well.

yay i hope tomorrow will be a fun day:) seems quite promising anyway.

went out with rachel today! was good to see her:) there's nothing like seeing people in person. as compared to talking online or emailing or watever. i think i shall visit tll on thurs. though that also means i have to buy stuff before that.. maybe i'll buy after lunch w lyd pam tinky~

march of the penguins is cute! but the soundtrack is really annoying. esp the singer singing english songs! man. i wanted to get up and bash the speakers. anyway.. slightly-grown baby emperor penguins are cute! haha. so downy and fluffy. and they waddle around looking like puffs of fur. and penguins sliding around on their tummies and clumsily falling over and all.. haha. so amusing.
oh the penguins smacking each other with their flippers reminded me of the madagascar penguins! i love the madagascar penguins! they're hilarious. i want ALL the penguin clips. heh. not that i've bothered going to look for them, but nvm.

uh. lemme see. tcc is so lovely! but very expensive. sigh. the real food, that is. i guess one can go there and splurge once in a while.
and pool! rachel's actually not as bad as she claimed. i haven't played pool in a long time i think. the last time was probably with ser.

and last monday class today.. i think bruises are definitely going to appear tmr. i also think deborah's right (i -think- she was the one who said so), sufian is a bit hard on poor white belts like me. but he does teach quite well.

alright i guess i should go and do something constructive. oh introsem mailing came today! there's nothing like receiving mail frm stanford to make you feel more excited.. if not it kinda feels like you've been forgotten. haha. maybe i just like getting mail/sending mail.

I HATE PACKING!!!!!!!! ugh. i want to whine and whine and whine and whine but everyone's overseas already:( poor clar.

haha. anyway, i'm so tired, and it's not like i haven't slept enough. last night was like 0030 - 0700 (i'm still hoping by this week i can wake up later and enjoy extra sleep). then i took a nap just now 1700 - 1900. and now i'm very tired. this thing is taking a toll on me man.

had a really lovely surprise at church, bible class teacher(s) organised a sort of farewell party for me. suddenly i'm so dua pai haha. and the scrapbook was so sweet! even though i wasn't supposed to open it until on the plane, hmm. too bad. haha. i think i really don't see leaving as such a big deal until other people make a big deal out of it. then i start to realise.

maybe hk's right, i tend to be a buffer and make things less serious than they seem. gd and bad pts, of course.

well anyway, off to sim lim for MORE shopping. i realised the inadequacy of my previous research, given that i didn't know built-in mic doesn't equal to mic output coming out thru webcam cable, there usually is another extra cable. so we tramped all over trying to look for either 1. usb-sound stereo plug/jack-in/watever you call it converter or 2. usb headset+ mic or 3. webcam + inbuilt mic with all usb plugs.
bah in the end didn't buy anything, cos not sure if they're mac-compatible. i didn't know apple was so annoying. but bro says the trade-off for virus-free and crash-free computers is worth it. i guess so.

and later when we got home and i did more research, found out:
1. mac messenger doesn't support webcamming
2. iChat doesn't support usb webcam (i.e. must buy the iSight, which is US$149)
3. iChat uses AIM
4. basically, webcamming with macs is a whole lot more problematic than with pcs
so luckily we didn't get anything. i shall just get that logitech desktop mic.

okay i hope i'm still making sense.
then, i finally lugged my suitcase out. and started packing. i understand why siewjin and sarah didn't start packing that early. anyway, and to my horror! there is NO way i'm going to fit everything into one suitcase. that's the first problem. i suppose desperation will give me the ability to handle 2 suitcases of probably more than 50kg (combined weight).
2nd problem, jiunhaur has informed me there are NO lifts in the dorms! i'm dead. i'm hoping there'll be some very strong guys around to help me if not i'll probably be stuck sleeping on the grass. and i'm also hoping some nice singaporean can come fetch us from the airport. haha.

and i'm really so tired.

sleep.

i'm quite tired so just a short post to complain about unfair service:p
dinner w reggie! haha. it was fun:) one of the waitresses was so biased.. man.. not that i really minded or anything but it was rather amusing.. the water in our glasses would be at the same level, but the waitress only filled his glass and happily ignored mine.. actually i thought it was just a one-time oversight, but constant observation proved otherwise. so i was laughing while pointing it out to reggie and promptly collapsed into more laughter when it happened again for the 4th time the entire course of our dinner (and the 1st time after i informed reggie of this rather interesting fact).

oh we had a nice time browsing cds. so tempted to buy david lanz/latin or flamenco guitar but i don't know if i'll like it. even though i liked david lanz's finding paradise, i think his other cds might be along different lines. and i'm actually rather sick of shopping: bah. okie off to sleep.

okay, i woke up at 8 today. marginally better. i suppose it's gd to wake up early in that it gives me more time to do stuff (as compared to waking up at 11 and half the day is gone) but maybe i should sleep earlier then heh. would like to get nice 10hrs before i end up not-sleeping-at-stanford.

and i had a rather amusing time looking at photos of poor eng seng in the library and rachel scolding him. haha. christine is so funny.. but it made me miss everything, kind of. although i'm happy not being cooped up in a workplace, i miss annoying rachel in the library! aah. well.

anyway.. dropped by weiying's house to return her chem txtbk. then i went to nus and stoned for like 20mins waiting for M1 dna lect to end. finally fiona n candice appeared. n monmon n raphael! yay:) mini-class gathering. haha. lunch at coffee grounds. and met hweeying aft that. oh listening to raphael reminds me of all the bio lects when i wanted to strangle him due to the plethora of lousy jokes.

shuttle bus to visit candice's room.. it really looks like a condo la.. from the outside anyway.. i always liked those type of bricks.



it also has the most gorgeous view. candice says drunk international students go and wade in the fountain sometimes.

well yeah. her room was full of ikea stuff.. and not very full of stuff like my brother's. but i guess it's diff cos she gets to go home every weekend/anytime she wants.

uh. lemme see. sat around chatting. then went off to orchard to do my shopping. as usual, didn't accomplish everything i set out to do. i seriously underestimate the time needed for me to make decisions. this is why i go shopping alone. haha. even the most patient person would find it a sore trial to put up with me. the worst thing was the shoes actually. i think i spent at least 1 hr in total trying on all sorts of shoes. the salesgirl was very nice though. she got me a basket and asked if i was frm poly haha. and "isn't it boring to shop alone?" so i was like no, i take very long to decide (not that she couldn't tell that frm my indecisiveness/pickyness)

so, i figured if i'm not satisfied i shan't waste $$. at least i got the shorts n track pants at a gd price. but now i need waterproof track pants. also at a gd price. hmm. and gd cut. haha. oh and i found vacuum packed pillows! yippee. unfortunately my vacuum packed bolster has already expanded:( hopefully i can stuff it into the vacuum pack bags without much problem/deformation. and i couldn't decide which pillow was better, even though i surreptitiously glanced around before dumping them on the bed and trying them out. haha.

and i need a new wallet. i shall attempt to find one tmr or something. although i wish i'd found nice comfy walking shoes sigh. i am really too picky. i have this tendency to want to buy a lot of things which i may/may not use when i see 20% discount. haha.

anyway, then i walked (very quickly) down to borders to look for old school, but it was not to be! ugh. i can't believe it.. kiat went down to buy last week or sth, and this week they tell me they don't carry the book anymore.. saves me $$ i suppose. but really..

dinner at venezia with lijia and pam who was like 1hr late cos she severely underestimated the journey time for 67 from tampines and then ended up stopping 2 stops late, bcos i didn't tell her it was guthrie house. oops. that poor girl, i can totally empathise given that i took 67 frm bedok home. and lyd who was 2.5hrs late bcos she went to get her phone (so she could return me mine) and eat dinner w her mom. but it was fun.. and it reminded me of mugging days with lijia (and occasionally joon). they revamped the decorations though. so black now. hmm.

alright. now to think about what to do tmr. i am so not ready to go. haven't started packing, haven't finished buying stuff, haven't read my books, haven't packed my room, haven't haven't haven't. i had better make all those things "hads" soon, if not i'm done for.

i was in a very horrible mood because of all the wrong things i did today. (and the unbelievable amount of time needed to choose a new school bag/books to buy which i didn't buy in the end).

but i checked the mail and surprise! mag sent me a letter! so heartwarming:) cheered me up quite a bit at any rate. and the quote was so sweet. thank you dearie!:)

and my bill has finally arrived so dad can stop bugging me about it. it's not my fault stanford is full of idiotic things which drain money. i suppose they have the luxury of that as well as sending stuff late and pple will still go there cos of who they are. argh.

uh. oh.. something i forgot to say. i look around my room, think about the days left. so i'm supposed to leave in 11 days' time, live a different life for 4 years, and come back.

sigh mac mini is giving me problems. why does it not have an audio in??? i am so annoyed

oh i have remembered something else. on sunday i was at sim lim with my dad and bro trying to find keyboard/mouse/webcam.. it was rather surreal. now i'm drawn into the world of computer specifications and hunting down the best bargains in sim lim (which my dad totally adores) . and thanks to the mac mini not having an audio-in i'm trying to find out if there's a webcam with usb mic. all this i wouldn't be doing on my own in normal circumstances.

another transcript

cosmos - 18th sept, 0915. T2, SQ16. says:
oh!
cosmos - 18th sept, 0915. T2, SQ16. says:
it's 1am.
clar:] 2 weeks says:
well done
cosmos - 18th sept, 0915. T2, SQ16. says:
i thought it was still midnight
clar:] 2 weeks says:
you can tell time
clar:] 2 weeks says:
oh wait
clar:] 2 weeks says:
you can't
clar:] 2 weeks says:
oops
cosmos - 18th sept, 0915. T2, SQ16. says:
haha
cosmos - 18th sept, 0915. T2, SQ16. says:
i'm set on GMT +7
cosmos - 18th sept, 0915. T2, SQ16. says:
that's why...
clar:] 2 weeks says:
for wat??
clar:] 2 weeks says:
that's so silly
cosmos - 18th sept, 0915. T2, SQ16. says:
i'm just joking...

i'm too gullible. haha. anyway, that was an interesting conversation. who here thinks i act like a kid? rofl. i suppose i do sometimes, that's why rachel n christine are so amused. hmm. maybe it's a way of keeping the child within.

shopping tmr! oh i must go and check my bank account for my pay! yippeee haha

ahh. i just remembered something i forgot to say. on sunday bible class teacher was just asking the other girls how many guys will be left next year and then i just realised that we'll be moving out of the class cos we've been there 3 years already. and i still thought i just finished jc. it is rather unnerving how the year is almost over and i don't seem to realise it. maybe that is why we need to be more aware. instead of rushing along all the time. esp those working. "no time!" is the most common complaint. but so much has been said on that already anyway.

i shall go finish reading my books so i don't have to pay library fine:p

bah i still woke up at 7.30 today:( this is not gd. at least i finished writing my diary stuff and have started getting my act together. it's not very nice to look around my comfy room and think, 2 weeks left. oh well.

melvyn who likes to annoy me. and then claim that it brightens up my day. he says he is not photogenic and prefers to be photographed in a hakama and a bokken (so a more impressive image is created).

deborah the all-things-jap girl. we ate so much at sakae sushi today! it's a wonder we could still roll. haha. and i'm sure she must be a really gd hostess.. can just talk and talk and talk.. chatter-box deborah.

okay i'm too lazy to post all the pics from yest (not that there were a lot to begin with, sadly)
i am so so tired, i shall crawl under my covers soon and hope tmr i wake up with a clear head. sleeping at 2am and waking up at 7.30 is doing nothing for my sanity. not to mention spending most of the day out. groan. tmr's gonna be another long day.

debbie the deejay! haha. she won some competition so she's going to seattle in nov to represent spore! cool huh..

christine the crazy whale who insists on calling me a goldfish.. oh she predicts that i'll come back with 5 boyfriends, one for each weekday (during the weekends i'll accompany my parents and pretend to be guai..) she's hilarious:) so full of nonsense..

rachel the librarian/squishy squid 2/octopus who keeps on saying i'm mad and wanting to squish me (ser, she bears an uncanny resemblance to you in this aspect) she was also trying to coax me to buy earrings yesterday, but her efforts weren't particularly successful cos 1. i'm lazy to change earrings 2. i'm v picky

wah. i'm quite zoned out. actually i've been quite zoned out since 10 or so, rachel will attest to that. but i revived while transferring my photos. but now i'm beginning to get woozy again.

anyway. last day of work. as usual, in the morning got nothing to do.. so went to pack library and wait for either rachel/debbie to come so can ask if they need help. well and also pack up my own stuff.

and i was wondering when either one of them was going to come in cos both of them were late.. haha.. well done. =shakes head= but for diff reasons. so debbie passed me this magical creatures book.. do cloze based on the creatures inside. the stories were hilarious.. i was summarising it to amuse melvyn.. okay my brain is really non-functional now.. maybe tmr.

then lunch at genki sushi w debbie n ey. haha i didn't know they pissed off national geographic pple. and ey treated me.. so nice. i must really go and get something for them. but i'm so lousy at presents.. sigh.

hum. oh T-notes. haha. by a very happy coincidence, the L2 CW that debbie did included a beached whale. hahaha. i shan't say anymore. and it wasn't my idea.. really..

and later christine came in and dumped a package on my head. the card was so cute.. i think she draws better than i do. haha. and i actually wasn't feeling that sad before that.

so hilarious. i'm glad i have the photos anyway. tho maybe i should've taken a video.. sharks.. wat a waste. nvm i think i shall go back n say byebye before i fly off. we shall see.

2nd last day of work. rather queer in a way. and i didn't really like the ending of my 2nd SR.. but i have no idea how to keep to the length and put a moral in and ...
oh but on the bright side zee said yest during gen t meeting the teachers said my SR for the L2 topic was good! (the topic was a house burglary) cos it's a difficult topic since there isn't much action.. haha. yay.

when i listen to phyllis n rachel talk about how TLU doesn't allow them to eat together (and times them for lunch -horror-) i feel very fortunate. the trouble is that i don't know what to get for ERU. it's not like i'm very close to them to begin with (a far cry from how johann was, at any rate), i'm just glad they're easygoing and everyth, even with all the crap that jc rains on them sometimes.

oh well.. yay rachel's going to treat me tmr!:) i think. anyway, dinner should be good. and very filling.. oh i'm so happy i finally found the battery charger for the digicam.. although i should've just switched on the light in the first place then wudn't hafta msg my bro to ask. ah well. but the thing is, i found it!:):):)

anyway i'm happier. as compared to just now when i was glowering because the IMM place cheated me, i thought the scholls were supposed to be cheaper there but they were the same price! in fact, they marked up the price and told me it was 10% off.. ridiculous.. okay i shan't work myself up.

rather sleepy. maybe it's the effects of contacts in two consecutive days haha.

haha. i had my free lunch today! i must admit it was quite boring half the time, given that we had to wait sooo long for food to come. like. appetizers were instant. but then the main course took 45mins!! !!!. bah. but globetrotters was really full.. i think there were like 70 pple heh. wonder how much jc has to pay for us. oh well. it was really filling though, i had maybe 4 or 5 slabs of fish on my plate and potatoes and veges and i ate everything up. haha. so fat. grilled fish provencale!
so we were all happy, full and sleepy at 2.45pm. haha. i think i might have liked the cheesecake but i don't think i could have finished/enjoyed it in my very full state so well.

and we took almost 2 hours over lunch. or maybe more:p i enjoyed going over to annoy rachel n phyllis. haha. apparently rachel was "throwing a tantrum" cos her food took a real long time to come.. ah well. i think christine was amused w my cartoons:) she says i'm still a kid. oh well. i think so too.

man there's something very wrong with me nowadays.. i think i've been doing too much writing, when i want to use a certain word i can't find the correct word.. it just sticks in my head and refuses to form into a word. blah. feel like an idiot sometimes.

yay melvyn came today.. i think the saying that everything which goes around comes around is true. bcos i annoy rachel, and he annoys me. okay i don't know if rachel annoys anyone (maybe phyllis) or if anyone annoys melvyn. oh well. and i still haven't seen deborah in ages, she must be too caught up with her cute french manager:(

so.. 2 more days left at work. oh it was so funny, one of the teachers came back frm maternity leave and was telling us abt how she shocked pple with her huge stomach (apparently larger than is normal for pregnant women). one day she walked past mcdonalds and a malay woman nearly dropped her burger upon seeing her, and exclaimed "so big!" (in malay). rofl.

bittersweet. although today i was bored even while alternating btwn doing a compo on something that happened at the beach and shelving books. oh well.

ooh sarah's pics look nice.. also a reminder of how everyth'll be new. hmm.

ah. i actually think i enjoyed my job at tll the most. which is quite queer, considering how everyone else apparently has a lot to bitch about. i'm just glad i ended up in ERU, even though i don't talk to them that much, cos TLU doesn't sound like a very nice place to work in heh. they seem to have so much more stuff on their hands (and subsequently are more ngiao about stuff)

so, back to why i liked this job the best. i think it has to do with them relying on interns quite a bit, and so it's quite normal to be an intern and everyone just fits in. or slips in. whichever. and colleagues are mostly quite young and fun. haha. and of course the job's interesting. though i think i may cross-eyed from staring at dictionary.com for like 50% of the time i was there.

okay i'm speaking like i've already left. but only 3 more days, it's gd to reflect just before the end. ohhh yes rachel calls me squishy squid (doesn't it roll off the tongue nicely? haha) so i decided i shall be squishy squid one and she can be squishy squid two. haha. like bananas in pyjamas (tho i never watched the show) "B1, are you thinking what i'm thinking?" and so on. and i drew my cartoon garfield fish for her today and she started squealing about how cute they were. i must go dig out the garfield paper again.. i only can draw the fish facing the left.

and i went to look at sherman's lagoon yest, as usual, and found that the cartoon had to do w whales! so i printed it out for christine. let's see what she has to say tmr. haha. hopefully she'll be amused.

and free lunch tmr! wahahah. and no minutes to type, yeah.. but i'll probably end up inktrailing stuff again. inktrailing is quite mindless, poor zee. ok not really mindless, but tedious. well. bleah. i don't feel like typing anymore.. time to disappear

hahaha. i can't believe myself.
transcript of msn conversation btwn me n kiat:

cosmos says:
in exactly 21 days from today
cosmos says:
we'll be sitting in the plane
clar:] 3 weeks says:
bleah
clar:] 3 weeks says:
don't remind me..
clar:] 3 weeks says:
i think i might cry at the airport. u'd better bring tissue for me. rofl.
cosmos says:
haha okay
cosmos says:
how many boxes do you think u'll need?
cosmos says:
3 or 4?
clar:] 3 weeks says:
boxes?
clar:] 3 weeks says:
we're only allowed 2 pieces of luggage leh how to box
cosmos says:
i meant tissue boxes

[unrelated stuff has been edited out.]
i couldn't stop laughing at myself. but really! luggages are related to airport too wat..
and now the mad hatter's diaoing me about dino tears are being large so i said maybe i'll cause a flood and everyone'll die. in which now, we have seemingly discovered why i'm the last dino around. everyone else drowned. although the question remains: did i float because i was the smallest/the fattest?

how thought-provoking.

more like how nonsensical. i must have read too much bagthorpe/gerald durrell. but i'm still going back to read more, given that i must return the bagthorpe book soon. haha.

i may be making excuses, but i think it's because i get injured so often i don't take it particularly seriously anymore. and i heal fast cos i'm young. oh well.

blading today! daryl's blades are really horrible, i have no idea how she can blade in them.. i was totally suffering during the first 45mins or so and wondering how my blading could have deteriorated so much in a few weeks.. then charm very nicely offered to exchange with me cos she says she usually wears daryl's ones anyway so its okay.. thus i discovered the joy of blading in good blades. haha. although i think that poor gal may have gotten a blister:( -feels guilty again- groan. but charm's blades were so much smoother. which is gd and bad. gd cos it's easier to fall if it gets out of control.. and the slopes, although scary at first, were super fun! haha. just roll down.

and i got my vacuum pack bags from parkway. heh thanks to passerby who asked val where she got hers from.. and it's such a coincidence i read it last night (i think?) and then was going to ecp today. ladida. am rather tired again though, yesterday i just plopped on my bed and fell asleep with the lights on and woke up at 3sth to realise i fell asleep.

i think part of the reason why i'm reluctant to leave is that i've made new friends in these very short eight months. which i don't really want to lose so soon, but hopefully that won't happen. and what's gd abt going off is that i get to shop for a whole lot of things haha. fun but tiring. and i'm so glad i'm going to a pretty place (so everyone says), cos i think i'd be quite miserable if i were stuck in an ugly place.
i think i'll have fun while i'm there, but while i'm here, inertia sets in.

i hope i haven't been repeating myself online. cos i can never remember whether i said it to people in person (and can't remember whom i said certain things to, for that matter) or whether i blogged it. so confusing.

sigh i was actually quite happy until i got home and got scolded by my bro:( but i think he's right really, i'm too absorbed in myself sometimes. therefore now i am feeling guilty. maybe it's just another of my -ignore-it-and-hopefully-everyth-will-be-right- tendencies.
i think i'm trying to do that now anyway.

and i'm quite tired. want to sleep. and sleep and sleep and sleep. i brought my tendertails whale to work today to show christine. actually i realised when i thought of whale i didn't think of the real one. cos the real one's really quite ugly haha. oops. tend not to think of animals the way they look in real life. usually think of cartoon/stuffed toy ones haha:p oh well.

i'm going to retire to the sanctuary of my room. and clear up my desk. haha.

i don't know why i wasn't in a very happy mood this morning. even annoying rachel didn't help. rofl. luckily it improved nearing lunchtime:p and i also don't know why christine keeps laughing when she sees me. apparently something about me is very amusing. anyway, i printed a whale tag for her today. rofl. it was most amusing.. she was sitting at the reception doing computer stuff and then the whole world saw it.. and when they asked her why, she pursed up her lips, pointed at me and said "ask the goldfish". i so do not look like a goldfish.

and i'm rather tired now. finally, my specs are made. but i have a sneaking suspicion that they didn't check my eyesight properly. i mean, my left eye is sufficiently blurry for me not to believe that my degrees increased by 25 only.. i must go find the prescription for my old pair of specs. and as it is, this pair is quite old cos i'm sure my contacts were of higher degree.. argh. and i don't like doing eye exams cos it merely serves to remind me how bad my eyesight is:(

i have increasingly less stuff to do at work, weirdly. not that i mind, because after a while writing articles continually does take a toll on me. so i go out and help rachel stick barcodes (and talk nonsense).

i want work to end, yet i don't.
want it to end so i don't have to get up at 7.45 every morning, spend my day in the office, ... and i'll get to go shopping! woohoo~
don't because i'll miss rachel and christine and listening on tchers' amusing conversations (esp ml & lcn together) and it also means i have only 2 weeks left.

so, while i was stoning this morning, i made out a list of things to do and people to meet. i have trouble visualising how i'm going to meet so many people when my weekday nights are very unfree. hopefully i can catch them for lunch. and my brother's still confined during the week!
:( very angry me:( i still haven't shown him the ipod flea movie. oh well. i'm sure he'll have a good laugh, since he was the one who told me about how apple's success is partly thanks to the sale of accesories for their main products.

at least i think i'm going blading this week:) let's hope i don't fall down anymore. haha.
i'm really too tired. and i need to finish clearing my table/getting ready to return the books i've been hogging haha:p oops

lemme see.. i was uber-bored in the morning.. oh wait. mom woke me up, but bcos i slept at 1sth last night i went back to sleep in my slothfulness.. luckily 5 mins later mom checked on me "not going to work ah?" that never fails to work heh.. except on 10 aug:D
and somehow, i put my phone in the pouch, and forgot to put it in my bag. so i was phoneless today. it isn't such a big deal actually, just that i was supposed to meet hk for lunch, and without a phone it's not as convenient la.

oh and before that i was trying to haggle my last 2 days' pay.. so i can work less.. but it doesn't seem like that's gonna happen.. i feel kind of bad when i'm bargaining with charlene.. maybe i'm just too nice. rofl. self-confessed.

it's nice to have mutual friends sometimes. but other times it's nice to have friends who're totally unconnected.

let me see.. i forgot wat i was going to say. nvm i shall just skip on to the next thing i wanted to say. read val wong's blog.. frankly, i don't know how she can feel so optimistic about leaving. maybe it's cos i'm just being contrary and not wanting to leave when i am going to (and if i weren't, i'd wish i were). maybe cos i still have 3 weeks to go. maybe i have just too much and i haven't come to the point to let go.

in a way i'm afraid i'll change and some relationships won't be wat they used to be. but again that has already happened in the many transitions frm pri to sec sch then to jc and now to the interim btwn jc and uni. sigh. and hk asking me how often i'm going to come back.. just brings home the point that although i'll come back this dec and nxt june, probably, after that i probably won't be coming back that often. and i won't see a lot of people. and a lot of things will change.

okay i think i worry too much. and i'm a very.. of-the-moment person. which may or may not be good, really. hmm.

haha so now we're on the subject of nicknames. i have just christened kiat "mad hatter". don't you think it fits him? i do:) now i need to wait to be inspired as to wat animal melvyn looks like.

it's funny how you just click better with some than with others huh. speaking of which, i frequently pop into the library to annoy rachel and be my crazy self.. so fun:D it's a way of stress relief. and requires the correct settings. haha.

i've kind of realised next week will be my last week of work. i don't know why i'm thinking more about it today.. guess once i stop work i must start to prepare to leave. : anyway, i realised when i'm working, i don't really think about how fast time flies. although it seems like for this job, there're less times when i feel like i don't want to go to work. maybe it's cos i have rachel to bully rofl:D and christine to make weird faces at me haha. or maybe cos it does encompass things i like doing. hmm.

oh.. housing package (not really a package, envelope) came today.. stanford really loves forms man.. now i have another 11-qn form to fill up.. anyone wanna listen to me whine? rofl. but like kiat says this form is actually much easier to fill.. as compared to the academic advisor one -cough-

and it's nice to have teachers that you can like. i think i've said it before actually. but somehow, things i think i will do, i don't really end up doing. i also realised after emailing ppl for a while i'll get bored/busy (or the other party will) and it'll just stagnate. but i guess meeting once in a long while is better than never. heh. at least they still remember me, i think.

okay i think i need to sleep soon. ladida. at least today virtually no back pain haha. and deborah keeps telling me about her new cute colleagues (and a cute french manager!) i'm so jealous:( hmph. haha.

oooh i'm very happy now cos daryl sent me the apple ipod flea movie! it's hilarious! haha. i shall show it to my bro when he gets back. sooo funny:D totally made my day:):):)

anyway, met stanford pple today, quite a huge gathering i must say. and actually when i went there and just saw clusters of pple i felt slightly disconcerted. heh. but i guess that's what the gathering's for, just go round and get to know pple. met lots of nice pple, although there was a lack of things to talk about now and then. oh well, looking forward to getting to know everyone better:)

but i don't want to leave again. aiyah. i think i'm forever ambivalent abt stuff. and when the numbers start diminishing.. that's when the compulsion to stay grows.

wah i'm so tired. i think it must be the vaccine. haha. anyway, i slept at 3 last night, got up at 10.30. ate mango cake yay!!:) haha. and finally went to get meningitis vaccine done. (yay!)

then down to toa payoh to look for specs. again. yes. visited like 6 shops i think. very sick of trying frames. decided on one final one, but wanted to check out sth else i saw last week before i made my decision. arm starts feeling sore from vaccination like chris said.

home. sleep!! yeah..
then out to westmall for dinner. supposed to eat thai food but ended up mostly indonesian food haha. oh well. oh i saw my other pair of frames that i was considering and finally am almost decided. happily. and saw nice comfy shoes! yay. keds sneakers. am thinking abt whether to get those/scholl/track shoes i.e. nike.

k sentences are quite short n snappy and not formulated properly today cos i can feel my head going round and round already, telling me i desperately need sleep. gnite.

i think i was actually quite happy today until i came back and discovered my housing assignment. (yes, finally). maybe i should've checked my mail while at work. but again that would have made me lose even more concentration heh. anyway, christine gave me a very-pink-watch! hmm. i'm afraid i'm never going to wear it. it is really, really pink. i mean i like pink, but there are limits. oh well. i shall stand it on my desk so it can replace my mini clock which broke down a few months ago haha.

and then the up-pitching.. wah.. i think i'm too accustomed to summaries/down-pitching things for p1s, cos it was quite difficult to cheemify the clozes.. man. so didn't finish that much of it. or rather, not satisfied. maybe i'm too perfectionistic.

there was this baby crawling contest at united sq which was quite hilarious cos the babies refused to crawl to the finishing line, mostly, and had to be coaxed there with jangling of keys/food/etc.

then selene's farewell party.. rather surprising there weren't very many rg pple.. and i didn't even realise it was shan i was talking to on the phone haha oops:p but it was nice to see/talk to people i normally don't see (yingling, shan, hwying, anna, claire, emtok) and hadn't seen lijia in so long! and serene t. sigh. chris joon ser jane all gone. feels weird. even though i don't always see them.. but still. at least there was pam:)

and i don't know why i'm still awake. ohh.. right i don't have to wake up early anymore yay:)
anyway yes.. so i came home and found that i got posted to loro. which i didn't even know where it was.. so i had to frantically search for housing websites (and almost wanted to curse that i didn't bookmark the pages bcos it'd been such a long time since i surfed the housing websites)
and realised it was florence moore hall, which i thought was supposed to be sle-dominant.

in any case, i was at first rather annoyed i didn't get frosoco (even after writing that idiotic essay! !!! !!!!!). i mean, it does have a lot of perks. but i guess i didn't even pray specifically that i'll get it, because i wasn't sure it would be best for me (e.g. given the distance frm main campus). so well, shouldn't be complaining. i think i'm a terrible person. when i'm unhappy i just flare up at any little thing and usually my family gets the flak: sigh. actually i think it's mostly my mom. poor mommy:(

anyway, i hope everything else goes fine. i think i really need to sleep.

when i read blogs of people who're going away soon/have left, i'm profoundly grateful that it's not time for me to leave yet. it just heralds the start of a totally new phase. leaving a lot of things behind. a lot of things will change whether i want them to or not. and keeping in touch. can i do that? more like, can i do tt succesfully? can i make the most of uni? can i handle all that plus other various newfound responsibilities? i'm totally not ready for this.

heh. so much for wanting to experience all the independence and wat not. i think studying overseas held such allure for me because when i was small i used to love those boarding school books. like mallory towers, chalet school, etc. i also liked nancy drew and famous five and etc but that's another thing. read for the story. anyway.. so yes, these boarding school thingies sounded really fun and all.. i think that must be partly why i wanted to go overseas. and also cos my brother went. i think i'm very influenced by him, actually. mac-convert and all. actually i think windows seems easier to use, mac is just prettier (and virus-free).

anyway. yeah. i haven't packed, i don't want to, i haven't bought a lot of stuff, ... haven't done the meningitis vaccination! aah. ahh. and then i'll have farewell notes to write soon. which is good in a way because these notes will express something that i normally wouldn't say. not in a day-to-day conversation anyway. it's kind of like the end-of-X-years-of-sch appreciation-of-friendship note. to put it very bluntly.

today lesley was wondering at how i could write in such a young manner. (at least, i think that was what she said.) she said she can write but it takes time and her writing's quite dry. she was commenting on my oral reading passages, one of which was on a gal visiting the zoo, another one of a guy getting scolded by the discipline mistress for a crumpled shirt. i'm not sure if sounding young is such a good thing heh. for one, it might be that my writing's becoming juvenile. but again, maybe i just managed to slip into the what-p1s-would-like mode in these past few weeks.

and i was rather surprised when the teacher said she wouldn't give the p3s my cloze cos the language was trickier. i mean yeah there's also time constraint.. but i was still quite surprised. cos of all the 3 clozes, mine had the least hard words. as in, least number of difficult vocab words. ah well. and rachel's so fun to bully haha. miss her on mondays. today she was squishing my arm and telling me -i'm- nice to bully. hmph. it felt like the blood pressure machine, u noe, the one that squashes ur arm until you can't feel your arm. although she didn't squash me that hard. but still.

i think i must go and read some oscar wilde. or saki. suddenly miss their style of humour.

okay my blog entry doesn't sound particularly happy, i realised. but i had quite an okay day today.. was actually doing work most of the time rofl. and nowadays i do work until the last min b4 i leave. rather amazing. but i guess it's cos i'm the only intern in eru left so all the little things get dumped to me. ah well.

today's class was funny. melvyn's always so nonsensical. though i think not so ridiculous today la. and the first time i see him wearing hakama! hahaha so amusing. nvm. i wish deborah would come though, miss training with her. anyway, at least i think i didn't roll as badly as last mon: if not tmr cannot work again haha:p the other day i was reading some horoscope book and it said librans have an aggressive streak and thus will take to judo very well. i wonder... haha.

hais 9 - 7 tmr to make up for friday so i can go for selene's party! oh no.. friday ser n jane will be leaving. blah. anyway, it'll be gd to see selene n anna n hwying n etc:)
oh i met tiff in the morning at the mrt today! so coincidental:) it was nice to see her.. tt silly gal says she keeps falling asleep during briefings haha:)

i think i'm a conditioned pessimist, tend to think the worst then realise reality isn't so bad. which may or may not be gd, since i feel happier when things end up better than expected. haha. wat a weird way to think. just me.

this is so uncanny. suddenly, the lines+melody of "It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right. I hope you had the time of your life." became stuck in my mind. and i couldn't remember wat song it was.. so i yahooed it. and found that it was the song that chris quoted on her blog and i actually have the song! haha. i like the song. but when i saw the entire chunk of lyrics (okay not that it was that substantial to begin with), i felt very sad. chris this is all your fault. because it's all true for our rg class. at any rate, it is, for me.

was reading some books (koped frm tll library as usual:D) about americans writing about france and french customs. some of it's so true (even after 8 years) and even if the rest isn't (i think), it's still hilarious. maybe i should have gone to france to study. it'll save a whole lot of $$ at any rate. but there's no use thinking about "maybes". maybe i'll just spend a quarter in paris:) oops. i just said maybe again. nvm.

surprisingly enough i did quite a bit work at work today haha. in the morning, that is. maybe cos i had deadlines to meet so i actually did my stuff. but by the end of the day i was quite sleepy/tired/sian already. this is called burn out:p

and sleepy because i slept maybe 5 hrs last night. not good. which is partly cos of a loong phone conversation. i shall try my best to forget the contents. just rather horrifying to find out some things i suppose. and to dwell on them is even worse. please don't ask me wat i'm talking about. this paragraph is meant to be cryptic.

suddenly i can't decide wat sort of mood i'm in. so confusing. sad that everyone's starting to leave? unhappy/dissatisfied in general? not wanting to leave? knowing that uni life is not going to be easy? aargh. i wish they'd hurry up and send my housing stuff. grr. not even a confirmed date yet, and i'll still have to add 5 days to that date unless they fedex it.

oh, i just remembered something. while trying to write that oral reading passage this morning, i realised wat's gd abt my current job. it's kind of like interning at sph, you get to write stuff and it's printed, and you get recognition (in the form of your name printed as author). just that i think it's better here cos i don't have to do surveys:p and i get to write any sort of stuff i like as long as i stick to lesley's theme. yeah, and i get more authority cos i'm the only intern left in eru/helping out with library. so, in that sense, one feels more important/valued. i bet tinky felt even more powerful cos she was there for the longest time and dabbled in the most things:)
but well, that only goes when everyone (including myself) is satisfied with my work. which may not necessarily always be the case.

i think i shall refrain from making funny faces at cameras.

anyway, my brother's hilarious. he suggested i buy a large sheet, dump my laundry in the middle of it and tie up the four ends into a bundle. then put it on a stick and march off to the laundry room. like a tramp or watever u call it.. u noe those u always see in books. haha.
and then when we saw this mini straw container he suggested i buy it.. so i asked "wat'm i gonna put inside?" and he said "u could keep a pet snake". rofl.

my shopping attempts today were rather unfruitful. ikea's fun to walk through though.. their bedrooms are always so nicely furnished. and makes you feel like getting a new house/redecorating ur room. i find that i like a lot of useless things. like moodlighting, which looks oh so pretty but is really quite impractical. so sad.

and queensway. man. i've never felt so clueless before. i wonder how i went shopping for shoes last time. oh well. i really feel like i need more time for shopping but with work.. how?? maybe i'll disappear off to orchard during lunch to walk around la. then i'll end up eating on the go again.. which isn't fantastic given that my dinners are usually not of the sit-down-and-eat variety due to time constraints.

decided to put up two examples of wat i wrote for the p1s.
no. 1: mad hatter suggests baking a huge biscuit for a table cloth so if they spill anything on it, they can just eat up the biscuit. march hare doesn't like the idea cos the table cloth will disappear in no time.
no. 2: in an abandoned garden, there are talking fruits and veges. one day the tomatoes roll out of bed to go to sch, and meet their strawberry fren on the way. she didn't eat her breakfast properly so had chocolate all over her (choc-coated strawberry haha:) and then at sch they bullied the dragonfruit cos it looks weird. so they got scolded. (i decided i must try to inculcate some values/educate them on wat a dragonfruit looks like)

so.. today's dinner didn't turn out to be rg gep farewell after all, sadly.. oh well. wat to do:( grr. but it was still fun anyway:) we had v gd food! waha:) love their stingray.. the chilli is fantastic.. esp with the lime.

joon lyd me
pam on top, frm left to right - me jane tinky

anyway, i don't know why but everyone at work had the mistaken impression that i injured my leg. hmm. oh well. it was nice they actually asked though. and i was very happy i made the correct decision to go to bugis to look for earrings! yeahh.. i didn't know i would find something which satisfied me so perfectly but i had the impression i would find what i was looking for:) yay.. but they were so pretty i almost couldn't bear to give them away.. but i think they're more chris than me la:)

yay and tmr's friday! yippee:D it's rather funny, when i don't work, i'll slack and wish i had something to do. when i work, i will want to slack and also will realise i actually have quite a number of things to do which i wish i had done when i was slacking. like wat ting was saying yesterday. ah well. humans.. reverse psychology.

i think powell's book is so right. at least, i think i read it frm powell's book. it said that a person is always changing, because that is growth. there is no static self. so you may have met your friend just a few weeks ago, and you meet the same friend again, but he/she is not the same person. and neither are you. interesting huh. i found it to be true today. or maybe it's a matter of perspective.

i remembered, when i was in sec 1, i used to avoid going out alone with someone else (and i'm not talking about guys). afraid that i wouldn't have things to talk about, afraid of awkward silences (which still happen now actually), afraid the other person would be really bored. but sometimes, not going out in a group is good. get to talk about more personal things.

anyway, watched charlie n choc factory! yay:) haha. oh, i didn't go to work today:D big grin. no minutes-taking today! wahahaha. so i decided i must take advantage of this one free weekday and go watch show.

now about the show. it's really quite twisted. i mean, willy wonka/johnny depp is so so sadistic. although i'm sure there's a better word to describe him. positively evil sometimes.. looking pleased when the children get disposed of one by one. and the guy who played the oompa loompa.. man.. i really wish they'd chosen a better-looking actor. it was quite painful having to look at ugly little men for the movie duration. this is why actors/actresses must look gd, one pays money to look at them for ~2hrs, evidently some quality is expected..

and i also thought that the oompa loompas' songs and dances were very commercialised. when i read the book, i kind of imagined simple singing and folk-dance-type of dance.. not rock and techno and mass-dance-type of dance. the edible grass field + waterfall thingy looked kind of fake. but maybe it was supposed to.

besides that i thought the child actors were very good.. charlie (freddie highmore).. mike teavee was funny.. although his sneering expression reminded me of draco malfoy haha. and the chocolate! wahh. i was telling chris i wanted to go eat choc instead of ice cream aft tt.. and i think tim burton has a fetish for patterns and precision. the factory, the trucks going out of the factory, the bikes delivering the posters, all had a perfect pattern. quite appealing in a way.

and although johnny depp's sadism was a tad freaky sometimes (and his annoying little giggle and hairstyle and makeup) he was still quite amusing at times. though i stand by my opinion that he makes a better pirate than anything else. ohh.. the way he clapped when the puppets caught fire was so funny/terrible.. the shocked looks on the kids' and parents' faces were hilarious..

three fav quotes frm him in the movie:
1. in the field/waterfall room:
"Everything in this room is eatable. In fact, even I am eatable. But that, my dear children, is called cannibalism which is in fact frowned upon in most societies."
2. when one of the kids asks wat the top/best prize is: "the best of prize is a .. surprise!"
3. upon discovering a silver hair during his semi-annual haircut: "And in that moment I realised; 'I must find a... hair (heir)'".

more funny quotes:
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0367594/quotes

and i had a very good time with chris today! yay:)

today's class gathering had the best turn out ever.. well not that we have had many to start with. but still, 17 out of 25 is fantastic. the only pple not there: prc scholars, ray, matthew, shaun, yonglai, candice. after reading that powell book, i find that with the class, we're like maybe at the fourth level of communication which is quite sad.

fifth level: cliched conversation e.g. how're you (and standard reply: fine)
fourth: talking about other people, wat they've been doing (reporting facts abt others)
third: sharing one's ideas/judgement
second: sharing one's emotions ("gut-level" communication)
first: peak communication (total honesty and openness)

so, u noe, we talk about wat's happening in our lives currently i.e. unis and etc.. it's just so superficial in a way. or maybe i expect too much. i find that anything less than maybe a level 3 is unfulfilling (and i get bored really easily, i need a change of attitude, and i seem to have said this before). but like andrew said, i guess we're not that gd enuff frens to progress to that level. oh well. it gets tedious after a while.

anyway, today i woke up to find that the state of my back hadn't improved much and i still felt the most exquisite pain if i twist in certain ways. luckily there's mommy to help massage and buy yoko-yoko haha. hopefully tmr it'll be fine if not i'll be even more unhappy at work.

i don't mind admitting that i'm in intense pain right now. when i shift from position to position. crap. i mean, i don't mind moderate aching but this is really too much! i should've stopped when i had to and not pretended everything was alright. bah. alvin was so helpful, one of his suggestions: "maybe you ought to gain some weight so you won't be so bony" he's such a hoot.. but that doesn't help when it's so painful! augh. and i think i'll have two "wristbands" tmr, just wait and see. and first time i've seen deborah in outside clothes. impressive:p and rather different, i must say.

anyway.. ml is hilarious.. she made them line up outside the library and wave at me.. and they had to file in and say "gd afternoon jie jie". rofl. then this guy was taking forever to choose a book to borrow so first she went "u have exactly 23 seconds left to borrow your book!" and later, exasperated "you're not choosing a wife u noe.. just a book!" rofl.

and i was quite annoyed when tst popped into the library and told me to -ahem- wear a jacket because parents could see the library from outside and one must always wear a jacket when in sight of parents. right. it happens to be like a sauna in the library, in case you didn't know.. of course i'm exaggerating, but stuffy air doesn't really go with jackets, unless your dearest wish is for me to suffocate. but there, i'm being uncharitable, she's not a bad person. i think. i wonder exactly which hr person told wtc that she ought to dye her hair back to black.. another ridiculous thing. at least she said jc hasn't said anything so she doesn't care.

ahh.. sharks. so painful. hope it subsides by tmr if not i'm done for.

haha yayyy i finally got to sleep a loooong time today:D let's see.. i think it was around 11hours. i was going to take a short nap last night and wake up to watch the arts central show at 10pm about smart animals but felt too tired. and actually i woke up at 7sth (i think for a moment, i thought it was a working day) then i realised it's saturday! if i wake up early today i won't get many chances to wake up late so i'd better make full use of it.. refused to get up and back to sleep i went:D yay. i haven't gotten the chance to sleep late in like.. at least 2 weeks.

and also the first saturday in a loong while that i get to laze around at home. whee~

ahh. i was clearing out msgs in my phone yest and realised i should really get down to finishing that quote compilation: haha. i am such a procrastinator. i think it's cos of the magnitude of the thing.. i'm so glad it's the weekend.. so sleepy every day. and working, no matter how, gets mundane.

though today we had a fun time laughing over oral pictures:D actually i didn't realise the train was heading towards the restaurant (with no tracks, i might add) until johann pointed it out. then we started looking for mistakes. and it was hilarious! haha.. got to amuse jane n lesley n rachel n debbie. and rachel is mad.. first she threatened to squeeze me (more like wring me) if i didn't shelve the books properly. then later she called me a pink piggie (or sth like that) cos i was wearing a red-pink shirt today. right. and she keeps accusing me of being v free/slacking. which i admit i do, but really, one doesn't have to point it out. anyway it's fun to annoy rachel:p

i think i figured out why i was a little scared of the eru pple. most of them are taller than me! bleah. i mean, it was an unconscious thing and i only thought about it and realised it just now. but i think that's just a small part of it. really depends.

looking foward to next week! two meet-ups:) and holidayyy!! haha.. i must watch charlie n the choc factory soon. i can't figure out what some parts of the reviews meant.. so johnny depp's acting was lousy? that's sad.. i think i shall have to wait and see for myself. time to go read my newly-koped books! i think tuesdays with morrie is much better than five pple in heaven.. maybe cos it deals with deeper issues wrt life and death.

ahh. i'm looking forward to nxt week.. got holiday! haha. and finally more time to sleep. i hope. today step groove/soul was fun:) the rhythm! nice beat..

work is fun when i can annoy rachel in the library.. haha.. just goes to show 1st impressions are sometimes erroneous. somehow i thought she wasn't that friendly but well.. proven wrong, happily:) on the other hand it's not gd to be proven wrong sometimes though (i.e. think someone's nice and find out otherwise)

today's lunch was gd! and then sitting in at johann's farewell lunch.. ml is really hilarious.. i think her classes must be loads of fun.. she has a very nice voice. and lcn too. and i still can't help laughing when i think abt jc telling tchers to warn their kids about large vans (bcos the compo for p2s was about this stranger tailing a lil girl, and large vans are usually involved in kidnapping cases). and then dg said, sarcastically and solemnly, (jc wasn't at meeting) "stay away from large vans.. even if your father drives one.." rofl

okay i just finished reading tuesdays with morrie. frankly, when I read the synopsis, I thought I wasn't going to like it because, why would I want to read a book about a dying prof and a student? okay, ex-student. in any case, I found that it was a rather powerful book. but when I was thinking about it, I couldn't really remember the things that morrie said? although when I was reading the book, they sounded sensible.

heh sometimes it's so hard to verbalise feelings. anyway, later i was thinking about what i could remember from the book that made a lot of sense to me. but it's mostly things like love and relationships are impt, our culture doesn't make us feel gd/help us to be more human. but it's humans who make up culture isn't it?

and things like, appreciating small things. when i think about it (and i read the bad reviews on amazon too, haha) a lot of the things there are really quite cliched, i think it's the story woven in that makes a difference.

or maybe it just meant more to me coming on the heels of reading that book about communication. and it does help one view death with less fear and more determination to do something about one's life. just that as usual, i think i'll forget everything.. something bad about me. i tend to gloss over things very fast. e.g. sleep and wake up and hey presto! all worries (and any other resolutions) gone.

but yes, there is much to be said about living a life that you believe in. which hitherto i doubt many people have been doing. the same way it's easier to stay here than go off to study, it's easier to just pretend everything's fine and do normal routine stuff than pursue wat you really want. again, that's been said so many times but hard to do.

i don't know why i'm so tired today. i kept yawning and yawning throughout the day.. and during meeting as well. although that happens once or so the past few meetings, today it was definitely more than that.

arrh i just opened another explorer window to do something and i forgot wat it was! bah.

i have decided one thing gd abt tll is that i get to kope bks frm the library. although that's not really allowed, but who cares. as i told ting, i am the self-professed worst employee. haha. i just do things my own way i think. and take lots of breaks. jane and kiat chuan and ting were so surprised at me. but joon wasn't. i guess it's who you work for.. ohwell.

ah. and i came across this book by john powell called "why i am afraid to tell you who i am". scanned thru it.. quite interesting. about how people behave around others. pple always say there is a "true self" as a core and many people put on masks, but really, ur true self is always changing, that's what growth is. i think i shall read that one day.. very interesting. and the different levels of communication. the lowest is the cliche sort e.g. "how was ur day?" and the typical answer "fine, thank you".

jane and joon came to lunch today! i must add that jane was rather late. grr. oh well. anyway talking to them (they have like 2.5 weeks left) made me realise something i actually wudn't realised until everyone's gone.. the feeling of not wanting to go. of missing everything here.

and i thought about it a little tonight.. it'll be a different style of teaching there and i'll miss it here.. ahh. rather inevitable though i guess. bleah. suddenly i'm scared all over again! bah.

and i think andrew is right, it's hard to find a job i won't be bored with. cos i told him i can't do things repeatedly cos the repetition makes me go mad. okay it doesn't really, but i get bored and don't feel like doing it anymore, must go do sth else.

oh wed i met ms hoo! she was so funny.. saying she decided to go enquire about learning lab cos the pple at the outside reception looked v free. and then i met her again later aft she was reunited w russell n grandma, and she accused me of slacking cos i take so many toilet breaks. in which i tried to defend myself by telling her the first time i saw her, i was looking for a teacher in the berlin wing. ah well.

ah.. okay.. thurs. i was talking to this p1 kid in the library cos her mom came late.. and asked her "how old do you think i am?" and she said "nine". (maybe cos before that she said something which sounded like nine, and i asked "nine?") anyway, it was quite funny.. i went back into eru to whine at johann who laughed at me.

fri. christine called me a goldfish and puckered her lips in an imitation of one. later on, in the library, i discovered two pages of some book lying on a shelf. so i brought them to rachel. i don't know why i couldnt' stop laughing, but there you are. went into tlu, waved the two pages at her, she stared at the pages+me. informed her that i found them on a shelf, and she was getting ready to whine, when her colleagues told her "don't cry lah.. got other things to cry about". so she complained "aiyah these kids.. why they like that..."
and i found that jane's from rj! wow. and all the pple in eru are arts pple. oh wait i think wtc said she did trip sci. well yeah.. it's so... dunno. stereotypical?

today! haha woke up late. oh well. my bed was v comfy, not nice to leave:( anyway, went sentosa, played beach vball. i'm really quite bad at it, my right thumb-where-it-joins-to-the-wrist is quite bruised now, and so is my inner right forearm. ahem ahem. then played touch rug. i don't remember wat sports i used to like, this is quite sad. not to mention alarming.
and then, it started raining and there were 7 of us stuck under that pathetic shelter, which wasn't of much help. luckily those china pple left their mats next to the shelter so we had extra protection.. ahaha. but still got rather cold. ah well.
rcs meeting. i think it was kinda pointless for the overseas pple to go since we can't join them.. i think? and that'll be like 4 years later.. =shrug=

oh and i got a little high after homezone.. first time in a long while too. just started laughing, probably bcos i was sandwiched btwn the twins and going mad. i mean, first, max "charmaine is fun to bully" and then immediately on the other side, martyn repeats the exact same thing. and then later it was sth abt daryl not liking them. and it was really, exactly the same thing! i don't know if they did it purposely or wat.. but it was quite funny somehow. just was in a crazy mood i guess. sometimes it's difficult to be in a crazy mood cos pple will look at you in a weird manner.. sometimes it's just good to go crazy and let go of everything.

ahh.. on a related line, i am totally sick of listening to star wars dialogue in the tll library.. i shall go mad soon, with the looping star wars trailer.. "the dark side.." "the dark side.." "the dark side.." -sound of light sabers flashing- (x3) and "do something R2!" (x3) u get the idea.. i forgot if rachel or johann very helpfully told me to go memorise the dialogue

heh haven't blogged the entire week.
so, mon.. qamarul n melvyn came for lunch. i wish deborah had come too so i wouldn't be outnumbered! gah. and i started library duty. and i didn't know that monday and tuesday were still part of the odd week cycle! sigh.. so i got mixed up. ah well. ohh.. and i faxed forte the wrong side of the timesheet (used recycled paper) so lorelle got oral pics instead of the timesheet. oops. haha. really pathetic.

tues ran off to esplanade to catch lunchtime concert. was kind of late. anyway they sang my fav song fly me to the moooonn.. haha. their bass is super powerful... man.. v cool:) and one of their tenors was very good.. as in has the jazzy feel. the other guy sounded like he was just singing words. or maybe it was the songs he was singing -shrug-

wed.. ser came for lunch. pizza hut! haha their lunch deal is really quite good. good value for money i mean. for once i ate faster than ser haha. but of cos that was partly cos she was doing more talking (as usual) and had an extra calamari to finish. ahh calamari reminds me of christine calling me clarmari on italy trip.
ah. oh yes so i went back up to help her photostat my ravel score (idiotic gal didn't tell me earlier so i could do it when no one was around.. man...) and ended up getting scolded by flora chan (i think) cos she wanted to use the machine. bah.
then time for meeting.. as usual i felt rather extra sitting in the middle of the path (cos the laptop had to be charged) but can look at the mirror and see who's coming! haha. anyway so christine arrived and tapped me on the head so i stuck my tongue out at her (the outraged expression on her face was quite hilarious) and she called me a horrible hamster! augh.
lesley on sick leave so i didn't hand up my work.

thurs. went in search of porridge for lunch.. lemme see.. i think i'll continue another time. too tired. and stupid sistic website..!$*&(^. freaking annoying. hopefully calling works tmr and we get gd seats. gahh.
anyway i really need sleep, i don't know why i'm going to wake up at 6sth tmr to go to sentosa.. i must be mad.

ouch. poor clar's feet are v painful! anyway, i had a fun time today:) although i felt rather extra at experiences fair, really. and met a few of my seniors. and met chris n ser n emilyn!:) and poor old max haha.. and jane. and johann. and wenyu. and then lyd finally arrived.. and we went off to planet fitness.

i've never gone into one of these gyms.. although i think i've possibly seen one of them (from the outside) in my dreams, weirdly. anyway it was quite cool.. although as usual felt extra cos lyd was the one wanting a tour and i wasn't intending to join them. and on the way to city hall, we stopped by some spectacle shop and lyd happily took down all the branded shades and tried them on me.

anyway we went pacific coffee to have a snack. since lyd didn't have lunch and was hungry. yummy apple strudel:D chunks of apple and raisins and icing sugar! haha. then jiahui msged to say she was going to be late. and lyd called junwan, only to realise joon just woke up (this gal is champion at sleeping) so lyd called them "silly donkeys" (haha somehow it sounds v cute) and threatened to make them pay for dinner. then lyd started telling me the story of pooh and his frens (which she's been hooked on cos apparently they're very amusing - this reminds me of teletubbies) and recommending that i should go read the stories too

shall skip forward to pam's play! haha it was really a mini-rj gathering again.. pam's class, yihan's class, yunlei, lou, aud, mj, engsiang, sengteck, jon chen, ... woah. lou's so funny.. complaining about how sucky smu camp was. anyway the play was quite funny.. although a bit mystifying when the pple changed identities.. and for some part of it i couldn't really make out wat moon n birdboot were talking about. maybe i shall go read the play..

oh before tt lyd suggested going to bugis to eat durians.. so we really did walk there (although jiahui thought it would take an hour to walk there frm old parliament house, haha) and yay! durians! haha but we were so obviously amateurish it was rather pathetic:p nvm, we shall improve.

4 is a nice number for a grp outing:) enjoyed myself lots today!

back from concert. rather tired and i have to wake up by 8 tmr.. well. hopefully nxt week sat i'll get to wake up late. haha. anyway.. concert was good.. i think their blending has improved. haha. just an impression, maybe the recordings will sound different though. or maybe acoustics were better. or maybe they just got better:) i enjoyed the last few songs most though.. probably cos they were my favourites to begin with..

while i was watching them a lot of thoughts came to my mind. some memories, not all of which are pleasant. and wondering about things i'll never know. or never want to know, for that matter. anyway, on a lighter note, what they said about mingze's english and his freestyling was hilarious.. cos it's absolutely true! haha..

oh! i forgot to say something about audry's photo in college day report. she was in this hot pink shirt. so i was like "audry!!" and she claims it's red. really in denial -shakes head-

mooo:( had to wake up at 7.30am again today. groan. poor clar. tmr i can't wake up late either if not i'll be late for church. and then the work week starts again. hai.. anyway, it was fun going back and seeing pple:) although didn't see that many pple.. i think i'll see more tonight:)


rachel! long-lost friend from LDS! haha. LDS is fantastic.. first chris n estelle end up in the same class.. then i found out rachel and alex chia are twins..

my silly pig brother:)

mommy.. people like to say she looks like she's my sister.

dearest fiona.. disclaimer: she normally wear skirts much shorter than this, apparently her mom decided on her outfit. i hope she doesn't kill me for this:p

yingheng and wang ning (mr incredible who's gonna be flying w me n kiat chuan)
mr chan, aud and lu bo! haha. mini 3c gathering.. ohh.. i forgot to take photo with sarah, darn.
me and audry:) the student of the year.. woohoo!~ haha. can u believe this girl got 3 awards.. hais.. she and jireh.

kaicheng, val lau, me, yuxian. val said i'd gotten thinner (yay! haha)

oh mr math chan, upon hearing about my new job, remarked that "everytime i hear from u u're doing something completely different". i wouldn't say completely, but well. mr bio chan is leaving nxt week.. btw serene, mrs lim says she misses u, u're actually quite funny. haha. quick, be honoured! which reminds me, i had better finish that compilation of quotes fast.. heh.

yay.. friday!:) and i finished one cloze passage today for p3 n 4s.. yeah.. 9 more to go for pri 1s. haha. suddenly i have so many things to do. and i only sound happier cos i'm at home now. anyway, for the record, yesterday lesley set me 3 sets of 3 cloze passages, 1 compre and 1 compo. so, i am quite occupied until wednesday. given that i can finish all that. i think at most i can churn out one or two articles per day, it's amazing how johann can finish things in 2 hours. maybe i'm just too perfectionistic. or like i said, low boredom threshold so i have to do bit by bit.

oh, and starting next week i have library duty because the wonderful boss (with another one of his fabulous ideas) has decided that librarians must do the returning of books (instead of letting teachers do it although they're perfectly capable of it). i shall read books there! hah. i mean, while taking breaks from my work, of course:)

and i wish they'll tell me my confirmed pay. then i can decide on how long i should stay. haha.
and i also think i'm not very easy to get to know. which is, hopefully, supposed to change soon. at first i wasn't sure i want that to change, but now i think it should. how confusing.

ah just for everyone's amusement, more accounts of how i never look my age. various staff, on seeing me for the first time, "are you a student?" me "no, i'm working here." staff looks puzzled. me "i'm the new intern". ah.
to top it off, on wed, christine, who interviewed me, walked past me without realising it was me at first then she turned around "so small!! i thought u were a student!" and then yest she called me a sec 3 gal who can't look thru the boston classroom windows (cos i'm too short). nyam nyam nyam.
oh also on wed i was asking this guy "how old are u?" and he said "9. u? 14 ah?"
i think i shall just be thankful i haven't been relegated back to p6.

shall just enjoy my weekend.. i'm going to feel even more broke though, dischordant concert tmr and pam's play on sun. but i'm sure it'll be well worth it, and i'll be happy! whee~ i wish my pay was here.. haha.

hum. today was a very forgetful day. first, when i was seated in the bus, i realised i forgot to bring my timesheet. !#%. then, when i was going into newton mrt, i thought i was in novena and had to take the marina bay line to get to my destination. so, i was wondering why the train was so crowded, then i realised i was headed for orchard. $%^ again. had to run to catch the other train back. i'm quite sure i made some more spastic mistakes but i can't remember them at the moment so we shall leave it as that.

lousy joon woke up late so didn't lunch w me. nvm, i have lyd for company tmr (i think) and ser on mon. and i'm going to feel even more broke: unless we eat at a foodcourt/hawker centre. i'm quite sure lyd wun do that tho haha.

tinky came to visit! it was really nice to see her, hadn't seen her in ages.. and she was actually telling me stuff about tll which i didn't know (nobody having bothered to tell me). so pathetic. oh well.

feeling rather sleepy really. i can't believe another week has passed so quickly. and i really don't enjoy 9 to 5 jobs. or 9 to 6. oh well.

grrr. i was originally in quite a good mood cos i got a pay raise today (amazingly, given that the only thing i've handed up in since last wed is a cloze passage on cloning). and then now i find out that my name, on my new krisflyer card, is "wen juan clarissa". this is the sole fault of that guy with the very strong indian accent at the other end of the line, when i called the sia krisflyer hotline. i am incensed. okay, after eating twisties i have calmed down. but i am still rather annoyed. i think i like eating too much for my own good. at least i hope i still possess this little thing called self control.

ahh.. woke up today and it was such a lovely cool morning i didn't wanna get up. as usual. i realised i kind of like rain. so if it's going to rain in san fran during winter it doesn't sound that bad! heh. or maybe i just like rain cos it's cooling.

anyway, got to work, no one was around. and i quickly got that stupid timesheet signed so i wouldn't have any trouble later. talk about idiotic rules.. drive me nuts. yesterday i brought candice into the centre (where the students normally wait for classes) cos i was gonna get water for her and then someone came out and was like "sorry, you have to wait outside".. like.. problem la there's no one around, i'm just trying to get water and we can go..

but that was yesterday. today i happily spent the morning reading books. since no one from my dept was around, and i couldn't think of anything else related to "civic consciousness" and "a brave deed" (for compo topics). by tomorrow i shall have to find something else to do. library-tidying only presents itself as a job at certain times of the day.

i think i shall quit by end-aug (unless i feel sufficiently poor) haha then can go buy my stuff and clear my room. it is in a horrific state.

oh, and like i was telling hk last night, blogging is cathartic. therefore when i blog, it'll more likely be unhappy. also i don't think i feel happy very often. three main states: not happy, neutral, slightly happy for a while.

my mom wanted me to bring my comforter along. (they don't provide comforters and pillows, ugh) she appears to think that i possess a magical suitcase which will never be fully-filled, and even when laden with a large amount of stuff, will remain feather-light.

i think i didn't blog for a while. oh. it was only one day. oops. yesterday was good! the little mermaid ballet under the stars! i'm glad it didn't rain.. but really, lines like "here is a knife. see, it is sharp" are really too much. luckily that was the worst. the stuffed shark was so cute:p and the crab and the lobster.. and the oysters! hahaha. so cute.

and gd old cheukka.. "can we eat during the performance?" (when sabrina mentioned the floats that they were going to dance on for some nus thing) "float as in the sea one?" and it was great seeing sya! i haven't seen her in ages.. she's so funny n practical:) (and scathing of silly remarks) and of cos lijia who's so tanned now..

anyway, as usual i didn't wanna wake up today. there's nothing like appreciating days of slacking when one has to get up to work. and no one was in my unit at 9am. ... time to slack! haha. i finished reading my book. happily. and i've finished my 2nd cloze passage.

i think i have a very low boredom threshold. i can't sit there and stare at the computer screen for very long, trying to craft something to my satisfaction. i have to walk around. and in that pathetic place, there is no where to walk to. basically, i need to have breaks in between, if not i'll just stare and get tired and accomplish nothing. somehow, putting aside stuff and coming back to it gives me new ideas. which are frequently better.

okay i'm just in quite a bad mood wrt work today.. luckily candice came down for lunch:) and a very good lunch it was! though i'm feeling kinda poor now hmm. and i got to waste extra time. haha. i'm probably one of the best examples of skivers you can find.

yeah and then i decided to go help out at the library and tidy up. and read some books at the same time haha. i think i'm anti-social. i have nothing to say to my colleagues. and there're so many times when i have nothing to say to a lot of people. including my friends. i somehow seem to remember not being this way when i was in sec sch but maybe i was just in self-denial or something.

anyway, i hate working in general. why do people torture themselves this way. okay i'm repeating wat i said in january. the only reason why i'm there, is so that i won't feel poor. but to not feel poor, i have to be unhappy. isn't that sad? clar is just cranky today.

i am further disillusioned. i think peiying is right, i am very unsuspecting. i.e. not cut out for this world. tinky says maybe i just look on the good side. thanks for cheering me up anyhow:)

yeah and i realised every mon n wed i'll have to rush. i think mon's more worth it though haha. and if you really do read this, which i don't think you will, thanks for trying to make me feel better:)

I think the pre-departure seminar made me a little more excited about leaving.. but only for the moment. still fearful of many things!

and yesterday in office when I was looking at the MSN website, I realised that (today) Harry Potter 6 is out! but I can't buy:( oh well. some kind soul please lend it to me? haha. though it's not that such a big deal anymore, I think I was more excited for the 5th book.. now it's kind of just for the sake of finishing the series. I think I've moved on. to better things! haha.

as foreseen, I was quite bored at grandpa's bday dinner. luckily two of my cousins were sitting at my table and my bro was v fascinated at the size of their youngest bro (sitting at the other table). the youngest bro is pri 3, and weighs somewhere in the range of 55 - 60 kg. he's around 1.2m. calculate his bmi, anyone? rofl. anyway, the oldest bro pointed to the youngest bro's tummy and asked "how many months already ah?" rofl.. and the 2 of them came up with various nicknames for the poor guy, including "mohammed ali" and "incredible bulk".. I really like the last name.

oh and I recounted the story of the creative primary 1 kid to my bro.. he sed he wud have given the kid A+ instead of failing him like the teachers apparently did.. totally agree there.. hahaha.

tinky has just related this to me, and it amused me hugely so i hope everyone else has a good laugh. the basic topic was to write about quacky the duck in united square :

this primary 1 wrote about quacky the duck who was walking around united square and then the duck rice seller at the food court saw him and caught him and turned him into roast duck.

tinky says she thinks they failed him. rofl.. although i sympathise with the poor fellow, it's actually quite an original piece of work:p creativity! hahaha. i must go dig up the pri1 file again and see if there's anything funny.

haha. i spent the morning reading the 2nd book in the chronicles of narnia. i.e. the lion, the witch and the wardrobe. it's quite interesting i guess.. although definitely for kids, given the language. which brings to mind my favourite bagthorpe series by helen cresswell.. it has a whole lot of super-cheem words and references I've never heard of and yet it's supposed to be for kids? hmm. anyway I wish they'd reprint it.. like my gerald durrell books.

okay back to the lion the witch n the wardrobe. the Christian references were really so obvious.. i felt kind of weird reading it. because it was too similar to the Bible. it's funny to have a lion instead of Jesus. even though it's a book.. okay nevermind maybe it's just me.

anyway, I stand by what I told Candice last time. Lunchtime is the highlight of the day when you're working! and of cos going home time, but that's at the end of the day so not counted.. I'm always very happy when it's time to knock off.. rofl

and I really wish I weren't writing for primary 1.. I don't think they're going to appreciate my style of writing cos it's been so long since I've done the narrative/descriptive thing. ugh. hmm. I don't know what I can write, actually. haven't tried satirising stuff in a really long time. or maybe that was only cos my brother egged me on. haha.

ah. and last night I woke up in the middle of the night, remembered I hadn't bought stuff to bring overseas, and I hadn't learnt how to cook. 9 weeks. or rather, soon coming to 8.

first day of work. something i realised, while i was staring around for inspiration. a lot of offices have no windows. that's why it's so oppressive, because everywhere you look, it's white walls. or cupboards. or walls. or computers. but actually even at home I don't think i look out of the window very much. maybe that's cos i have the luxury of not-staring-at-the-computer-all-the-time at home.. haha.

and taking minutes is very stressful. maybe cos it was my first time. or i didn't know what's important. i'm v glad i get to miss the 2nd meeting on wednesdays though haha:p

i think i shall take up my mom's suggestion and go read the lion, the witch and the wardrobe so i can, ahem, do my research better. haha. yeahh.... but after looking at all the pri sch stuff i'm like .. all this stuff is so long ago.. like narrative essays with a setting, building up to climax and resolving, different ways to describe stuff... synonyms for walk, anybody?

went to collect cheque today. i must say, i still think it was quite a waste of time to make both of us go down to collect it.. anyway, the tea cup set was so interesting.. i've never seen tea made like that. haha. oops. ignoramus. and he spent quite a lot of time telling us about ypag. some of which bored me to tears, rest of which was rather illuminating. i bet ting enjoyed herself though.. right? heh. this is exactly why i don't want to work for the government. cos i'm not interested. or maybe i'm one of the typical apathetic youth. not a very good sign.

anyway i start work tomorrow. finally, i'll be less broke. but i have to wait till end of the month to get my pay:( bah. therefore outings must be cut down until i receive some $$.

i guess i did have quite a fun time after all.. although i've come to dread the loooong walk to east coast park frm kembangan mrt. bleah. it's really long okay! even while i admit that i'm lazy. 1/2hr walk. and in the hot sun. it was nice cycling though, i haven't cycled in a looong time. a little wobbly at first. like amos said, one doesn't really forget how to cycle. or blade. or play the piano. just becomes rusty from lack of use of the skill.

daryl has taken to poking me cos of the various noises i make when poked.. this is vaguely reminiscent of serene's favourite hobby. not a good sign.

everyone keeps dwelling on the fact that i eat very little. i think it started from camp when my plate was usually quite empty due to the not-so-wonderful food at desaru. so anyway, today charm/daryl described my lunch as "2 grains of rice and a molecule of potato". during dinner jonathan said i was trying to distract them so i'd fling my chicken somewhere else n pretend i'd finished eating it. or fling it into daryl's plate and pretend "wah, daryl, u also never finish!"

there's some conspiracy among them to put me in the boot. cos there're always more than 4 pple when we go out, and only one car. so, in order to fit everyone in, the reasoning is as follows: the smallest (i.e. me) should go into the boot. as suggested by ruishan first, then cynthia, then jonathan. in the space of the afternoon, all at different times. i don't believe they heard each other really, which is even more terrifying. haha. -shakes head-

amusing pple.. although really, while i was in school i don't think i would have spent so much time going out.. so that's one thing to think about hmm.

ah, i just realised stanford's commencement address by steve jobs is in today's papers. roxy! haha.

haha, last week i had one cut on my left index finger. this week, i have cuts on my left middle finger, and right index n middle fingers. even though they're less deep cuts, but still.. sheesh. next time i need like fully-protected gloves to blade.

anyway, i had a good day! happy clar:) although it's on journeys (with no books to read) that one starts reflecting on many many things. not all of which are pleasant. e.g. i lead a very boring life at the moment.

haha.. thanks to ser for alerting me to peiying's newest blog post.. her projection into the future is a magnificent piece of work! i think only pple who were there will get the jokes though.. but that's the good thing too:D i'll remember all those things we talked about tonight.. i think it was quite a good turn out, happily for everyone:) usually i don't like gatherings with too many people cos half the time you don't get to talk to half of the people purely due to seating arrangements, but cos today we were at crystal jade la mian (yum!!) with a nice round table.. it was good!

i think next time we should only have gatherings at places with round tables. haha. when there're more than.. 6 pple. anyway.. everyone go read peiying's projection into the future! rofl. am quite looking forward to blading tmr, it's fun!! whee~ and blading on sunday again (i hope my legs won't drop off)

alright, i finally booked my air ticket. oh dear.. i think i'd better learn to get things done faster without my mom reminding me: anyway, leaving 18 sept morning. and will be back in dec, happily. haha.

i'm so sad paris lost. but somehow before i heard the results i already saw "london wins 2012 bid" in my head. weird huh.

ahh.. i found the movie review on the new paper website. i remembered correctly! the actor n actress for "be with you" fell in love on set. so it says. how sweet.. fairytale ending maybe.. haha.

anyway, on my mom's suggestion, which i finally decided to take up, i called up one of my previous job-agency-contacts. hopefully she gets me a good job, since nobody else seems to be replying to me. and it's so weird, yesterday i was at raffles place wondering if anyone was still working there and it seems like there's no one now.. whereas in april or so there were tons of pple around. i think i know why.. all the ernst n young pple disappeared. n chris n anna n lynette n kahli n ...

funny journey of emotions.
before really applying to US unis, excited about going overseas.
when applying, more worrying about the applications than anything else.
when results were out, joy! of course there was an element of shock/surprise.
while trying to decide whether to stay/go, huge dilemma.
after I made my choice, reluctance to leave. which became even more pronounced while filling up those famous 14 forms, because it was an indication of just how much stuff I'd have to do on my own there. and with the reluctance to leave came fear of independence.
now.. I don't really feel anything. maybe the excitement will reappear when I go shopping. haha. or maybe I need to go look at the bulletin. or when my housing stuff comes out.

there'll be so few people left to send me off! if I have a sending-off, in the first place.

wow i'm so tired. as usual. i think i'm going to sleep another 10 hrs man. haha. everytime I spend the whole day out that happens. and then mommy won't be happy when I wake up late n i'll get scolded. bleah. anyway, be with you is a very sweet show. albeit very sad. it reminded me a teeny bit of "turn left turn right" (supposedly-unrequited love, in a way) and also of "quill" (wringing out the sad bits).

i have 10 weeks left. and no air ticket yet. wish they could house me on 17th so i can leave on saturday. and the weirdest thing is that i don't know why i prefer sat to sun. maybe more pple'll be free? ah well. shall see what happens.

ZZzzzz

i think i had a quite a gd time overall:) though it was a looong day. and had nice dessert at marche! haha. yum. fat.